“If I can help with anything, please let me know.”
“That’s really sweet of you. How are you doing?”
“Not so great.” That’s the truth, and with another bomb about being pregnant falling in my lap, I still feel tense.
“I’m still in shock, Anastasia. When Desmier told me what happened, it felt unreal, like he was talking about somebody else. But I feel like I should have known. Your father is truly despicable. Truly.”
I nod, holding back tears. “I know. Do you feel differently about me?” I’m interested to know because things will be different now in ways I might not know yet.
For a start, the Butyrskayas were Knights. Things will be different just on the basis of that.
“In what ways, dear?”
“Because I’m not the real Anastasia.” When I say it like that, it feels weird. I’ve decided to keep my name because I’ve gone by Anastasia for too many years to change it. In my heart though, I know I’m Mischa Butyrskaya. “I’m not the girl you spoke so fondly off, who wanted your wedding veil.”
Sadness enters her eyes. “I don’t feel any differently about you. I will always love you no matter who you are. But my heart aches when I think of what must have happened to the real Anastasia. Your father hasn’t been found yet, and knowing him, I doubt he’ll be cooperative in telling anybody anything.”
“No, I don’t think he will be.”
“Did you remember everything?”
“Just the incident itself and what Uther did.” Saying his name like that feels better, but it still hurts. “At least I remembered how the accident happened. A man chased me through the woods, and I ran into the road.”
“Did you see what he looked like?”
“No.”
“My God. This is terrible. How are you feeling otherwise?”
How am I feeling?
Shaken, terrified, freaked out because I’m about to become a mother and I don’t know the first thing about being one.
A wave of nausea hits me, and I place a hand to my stomach.
“Anastasia.” Mira rests her hand on mine. “You look like you’re going to fall off the chair.”
I should tell her what’s going on with me. Or, rather, inside me. If ever I needed to speak to anyone I trust urgently, it’s now. Mira is probably the best person because she’ll know what to do to calm me down.
“I… just got told on the way here that I’m pregnant.”
Mira’s eyes widen. “Oh, my goodness.”
“It’s sudden. And… I don’t know what to make of it.”
Her face hardens and she straightens, moving her hand away from mine. “Well, that’s such a shame. I was hoping you would have closed your legs to that filthy animal. But now you’re having his offspring.”
At first, I think I misheard her or imagined what she said, but her stony glare confirms I didn’t.
“What, Mira?” I ask the question anyway because I’ve never heard her talk that way.
“I think you heard me perfectly. I never thought of you as a whore, but maybe I expected too much when it came to my husband’s bastard son.”
My mouth drops and something eerie races over my skin. “Why are you talking to me like this? I’m not a whore.”
“I beg to differ. You were probably in that monster’s bed days after you were supposed to marry my son.”
My chest tightens and I can’t deny the accusation because I was. I just don’t know why she’s talking to me like this now.