“Fuck,” I groan against her mouth at the same time she gasps.
Bloody fucking hell. This is not normal, after all.
At first, I denied it because it didn’t make any sense, but now, it’s crystal clear. Being inside Rai is like finding home—which is bloody weird considering I’ve never had a home. And until her, I didn’t think I had the right to covet it.
Now, I want it—need it—with everything in me.
I let her legs trap me in as I slide in and out of her in a rhythm I’ve never tried before—slow, moderate and too fucking deep. I take my time rotating my hips, pulling out almost completely then thrusting back in. I tell myself it’s because I don’t want to hurt the baby, but soon after, the pace grabs and drags me under.
My body has never been in synergy with hers as it is now. Rai holds her breath, then gasps, then holds her breath again. She has never been good at controlling her air intake whenever she’s turned on.
I place two fingers in her mouth and open it, using the chance to glide them against her tongue. “Breathe, Princess. In. Out. That’s it.”
Her eyes never leave mine as she follows my lead.
I slide my fingers from her mouth and use them to part her arse cheeks. Rai gasps as I slowly push my middle finger inside. Her walls clench further around my dick as a moan rips from her throat.
Holy fuck. I want to own every inch of her here and now, but she’s too damn tight.
Still fucking her in the arse, I pick up my pace in her pussy, and she bucks off the bed, murmuring, “There…there…”
“Here?” I rasp against her ear as I pull out then pound back in, hitting her sweet spot.
She shudders and her legs tremble as she shatters all around me. Rai might act like she needs no one on the outside, but she always, without a doubt, comes undone around me.
And in a way, she has the same effect on me. I’ve never wanted to own anyone as much as I crave her. I never thought about complete belonging before she came along. She’s the only one who drives me crazy day in and day out.
I keep thrusting into her a few more times before my own orgasm sweeps me under. A groan spills from my lips as I empty myself inside her tight walls.
Rai slowly closes her eyes, lips pursing. I wrap my arms around her waist, holding her close. My head rests in the crook of her neck and I nibble on the hickey I left there yesterday.
She remains still for a minute and her breathing eventually goes back to normal.
I think she’s fallen asleep, but then she whispers, “I’m going to abort the baby.”
24
Rai
Kyle isn’t there when I wake up in the morning.
In fact, he hasn’t been there since I said those words. He pulled out of me, and although he didn’t leave the bed, he didn’t hold me either.
He was there in body, but not in soul. For the first time since we got married, he slept with enough distance between us that I shivered in the cold.
And in a way, it felt like he disappeared again.
I should’ve seen that coming when I said I’d get an abortion, but predicting something is entirely different from actually witnessing him withdraw from me. I guess a stupid part of me hoped he’d rectify his mistake by letting me have the final decision and actually respecting it.
Instead, he didn’t talk to me, didn’t fight, and didn’t even make one of his distasteful passive-aggressive remarks. He just left as he usually does.
I try to ignore the soreness between my legs as I get ready for my day. I shouldn’t have let him fuck me last night.
I really, really shouldn’t have.
But hearing his soothing voice and feeling his warmth at my back loosened me up. It’s the fucking hormones; I can feel them stealing my good judgment away and scattering it into the air.
That’s why I said what I did right after we finished. I couldn’t just allow him to take everything from me without a fight. He wronged me. He put a baby in me without my permission, so fuck him and fuck the way he withdrew from me.
Ruslan and Katia wait for me in front of my room, expressions concerned.
“Did you even get any sleep?” I ask.
Ruslan gives a sharp nod. “Yes, miss.”
“No, you didn’t. Look at those bloodshot eyes.”
“They will eventually go away.” Katia lowers her head. “We…we would’ve never been able to live with ourselves if something happened to you.”
“If we were there, you wouldn’t have had to go through that, miss,” Ruslan agrees.
“Hey, you two, I was the one who told you to make sure Asher and Gareth were safe. Okay?”