I looked at myself in the mirror. My eyes were still red, my face a little blotchy, but I felt different, stronger, less alone. I hadn’t realized what a toll it had taken on me, keeping all of that inside, keeping my mother on the outside.
“Ready,” I told her.
We walked back into the party together.
“We need the candles, Countess!” Swiss yelled from outside, proving that we’d chosen the right time to finish our conversation. “And the cake.”
Mom shook her head, smiling with her whole face. Her whole soul. She took a moment to kiss the side of my head.
“Are you going to be okay?” she asked quietly.
I looked out to the party. “Yeah,” I replied.
She gave me one more look before walking toward the kitchen. I went outside, intending on eating since I was suddenly ravenous without all that toxic truth taking up space.
He was on me the second I stopped at the large table of food.
“You okay, baby?” Elden murmured, coming to stand beside me at a distance that was much closer than he’d ever risked.
I glanced around. Mom was in the kitchen preparing the cake, Swiss in there with her and Declan. All of his focus was on them. Everyone else was distracted with their own children or wives.
“I’m fine,” I told him, taking a carrot from the table and nibbling on it. I searched the table that was overflowing with all kinds of snacks. “I’d love a glass of wine,” I groaned, staring longingly at the ice bucket.
Elden chuckled.
Chuckled.
Like we didn’t have my stepfather’s reaction to my pregnancy right before us. Like we didn’t have my pregnancy and the life of our child right ahead of us.
Like he didn’t have a care in the world. Though that was vaguely worrying, I could not help but marvel at what Elden looked like when he chuckled. How he held himself. It was no longer as if the world was on his shoulders. There was something freer about him. And that was because of me. Of us.
“You’re really happy about this.” I leaned forward, closer to him than I should’ve been, brushing up against the edges of his cut.
Elden looked down at me. “I’m really fuckin’ happy about this, baby.”
The air buzzed with electricity. I drifted off somewhere different. Somewhere ours. I was about to go up on my tiptoes, clutch onto his cut and kiss him in front of everyone.
“Cake!” Swiss’s voice boomed from the kitchen and tore the moment apart.
I scuttled back. Elden’s lips clamped together.
I gave him one last look before moving to the kitchen where everyone had gathered for the cake. Elden stood behind me. Much too close. His hands found the hem of my dress. Crept up it until his palm was flat on the skin of my ass. It stayed there the entire time we sang my brother happy birthday.
Because, it seemed, Elden was done hiding things.
We weren’t just playing with fire now. It had been set and was readying to blow with the direction of the wind.
It remained to be seen if it would burn everything to the ground.
ChapterEighteen
“You’re not pushing me away,”I pointed out as we laid in his bed. I’d gone back to the club, slipping out with Elden after Declan had shoved his face in the cake.
We’d gone straight to his room where Elden had torn my sundress off me and spent a long time making me forget about everything but our bodies moving together.
Then I washed my face, complaining about the poor options I had in regard to skincare and brushed my teeth with him standing beside me. It felt surreal to be standing at a sink with Elden, wearing his tee, pregnant with his baby, brushing my teeth. It also felt right.
But a small voice was telling me to run. Telling me that something was going to happen to rip apart this fantasy.