Noah could guess at once that the man was Jasper Werther, the man-stealing viper. The uneasy feeling that Jasper Werther had at least an inkling of who he was made the prickles running down Noah’s back even more pronounced.
Noah chose to ignore the prickles—and to ignore the prick—and to keep steady on his righteous course of action.
“Marcus,” he said again. “I’ve traveled all this way, left everything behind me—my job, my family, The Brotherhood, all of it—to come and find you.”
He had an entire speech prepared. He’d had weeks to rehearse it on the ocean crossing. It was sheer perfection, as far as he was concerned. All he needed to do was speak the words of his heart now, and he was certain that everything would fall into order.
He stepped forward again, reaching for Marcus’s hands, but again, Marcus dodged away from him.
“My God, Noah,” Marcus said in a gruff voice, almost as though he were…afraid of Noah. But that was impossible. Except then Marcus said, “Have you taken complete leave of your senses now instead of just partial leave?”
The suggestion that Noah was mad felt like a dagger in his heart. He was not mad.He was not mad!No matter what his sister and the doctors tried to tell him.
He had a speech to deliver, and he would damn well deliver it. And once he did, once those perfect words were spoken, Marcus would see the truth of their love, leave the odious Jasper Werther behind, and return to the happy life they had together.
“I love you, Marcus,” he said, standing tall and putting his heart into it. “I have loved you from the moment I laid eyes on you. We are destined to be, my love. You are the anchor that grounds me, and I am the wind that lifts you aloft. Do not let a few petty misunderstandings come between us. Our love is perfection. It is the stuff of fable and fairy tale. I shall be devoted to your happiness every moment of my life. I will—”
“Enough!” Marcus shouted, as though Noah had spewed a string of gross epithets at him instead of professing the tenderest of emotions. He glanced apologetically to Jasper Werther, then took a step toward Noah. He removed his hat to shove a hand through his hair, then sighed, “Noah, it is over between us. It has been over for quite some time. I am very sorry that you cannot comprehend that—”
“I do not accept it,” Noah cut him off, panic welling within him. This was not how the scene was meant to play out. Marcus was meant to be moved by his words and fly back to him.
Marcus sighed again, more heavily. “I do not wish to be with you, Noah. You must put that notion out of your mind at once and attempt to move on with your life. We are not suited.”
“Yes, we are,” Noah argued, a maelstrom of emotion raging within him. “I love you. We are meant to be together. We are two halves of the same whole.”
Had he said his magic words wrong? Shit, shit, shit. If he had spoken the words correctly, Marcus would have fallen into his arms, and they could have been happy.
“Let me try again,” he said in a rush, holding up his hands. He took a deep steadying breath, pressed his eyes closed, and fought to remember the exact wording of his declaration. “I love you, Marcus. I have loved you from the moment I first laid eyes on you.” That was better. “We are destined—”
“Noah, stop!” Marcus shouted again. “You have to stop this at once. We are over. We were never meant to be.”
Noah opened his eyes to what amounted to a nightmare. “I refuse to believe that,” he said with far more bravado than he felt. “I love you, and you love me.”
“I do not,” Marcus said, sounding sad and exhausted now.
“But we are—”
“He does not want you,” Jasper Werther said, stepping forward as if he could shield Marcus from Noah. “You treated him abominably,” the bastard went on. “You made his life a living hell with your erratic ways and your mania. I can see that mania on full display right now, and I do not blame Marcus for leaving you one bit.”
“You know nothing of it,” Noah protested, his heart breaking into a thousand pieces. If he had just spoken the words correctly…. “You are no one, sir. You are nothing to him.”
“Jasper is my beloved,” Marcus said, taking Jasper Werther’s hand and gazing into the man’s eyes with the sort of love that should have been reserved for Noah. “We are very happy together.”
Jasper Werther smiled back at Marcus, making Noah feel sick. That was supposed to be him. Some devil had intervened and cast a spell on his dear Marcus. It was a nightmare.
“This cannot be happening,” Noah said, reeling back a step. “I left everything. I traveled across an ocean to find you. I am supposed to win you back. We are supposed to be happy together.”
“It wasn’t meant to be, Noah,” Marcus said, a bit kinder, but still too hard. “You shouldn’t have come.” Before Noah could say anything else, he went on with, “Now, if you will excuse me, I think it would be best if I left. I’m expected at the Tribune Building. Good day to you, Noah, and…and I hope you make it home safely.”
With a curt nod, Marcus put his hat back on and marched for the door. Jasper Werther followed him, giving Noah the evil eye as he passed. When they were almost to the door, Werther leaned in to whisper something to Marcus. The two began a conversation as they left the building.
Noah felt as though all the sunshine and happiness had been sucked out of the world with Marcus’s exit. He’d left everything in his determination to win Marcus back, and he’d failed. He’d been so sure, so absolutely certain that Marcus would come flying back into his arms the moment he saw how much Noah loved him and missed him.
He’d been so certain.
He didn’t know what to do. Everyone in the club was staring at him, and instead of giving him the confidence of an audience, it made him want to sink in on himself. His hands and feet had gone numb, and the irritating buzz of thoughts and feelings inside him, telling him he was worthless, he was a fool, he had brought shame to himself and his loved ones, was too much. He raised a hand to his ear as if he could block those voices, but they were inside him. They were always inside him.
“Are you quite alright?” a friendly voice said from the bar.