“Do you know if something’s up with Harrison?” I asked. “He got so quiet all of a sudden, did you notice?”
“I noticed,” she said with a slow nod. “He wants to quit soccer.”
“Is that all? He’s so good at it, but if he doesn’t want to do it anymore, we can maybe schedule the cooking class in its place.”
She sighed. “No, he doesn’t want to do anything in its place. He got upset because he was tired of doing something different every single day. He wants free time to do whatever he wants.” She paused and then added, “Like a normal kid.”
“Okay,” I said, not loving the sound of my children running free. “But why get so upset about it?”
“He’s afraid of disappointing you,” she blurted.
“What?” I was incredulous.
“He’s always talking about you telling stories about how your father wanted you to do your best and how hard you worked to make him proud. He wants to make you and his grandfather proud. He’s trying to live up to a memory.”
I groaned and let my head drop into my hands. “I just wanted them to stay busy,” I said. “I never meant to put pressure on him.”
She patted my back but pulled away as fast as if I’d burned her. I grabbed her hand and looked at her.
“I’m really sorry things ended up awkward,” I said. “You’re so good with the kids, and I’m thrilled they’re opening up to you like this. I need this kind of feedback.” I let her hand go before she dragged it away.
“Things aren’t awkward,” she said, too fast for me to believe her. I raised my eyebrow and she snickered unconvincingly. “Really, they’re not.”
“You eat in the kitchen now and hide out in your room the minute the kids are in bed,” I countered.
“I’ve been tired,” she said. “But I was going to watch Mississippi Moguls on the big screen in the media room tonight. If that’s okay.”
“It’s more than okay. How about I join you?” Her breath hitched, and I leaned back. “I mean, things are completely normal, right?”
I was playing with fire. I knew it and couldn’t stop. But I needed us back on easy footing for the sake of the kids. What if she’d been too uncomfortable to come to me with Harrison’s problem? We needed to be a team.
“Sure,” she said, warming to the idea. “See you at nine?”
“I’ll bring snacks,” I promised.
I headed to the kitchen to beg the cook to make brownies since they seemed to be Bailey’s favorite. I just wanted to see her smile at me again, and mean it. Yep, I was definitely playing with fire.
Chapter 12 - Bailey
I was brimming with trepidation and overflowing with excitement. I knew I was playing with fire by agreeing to hang out with Will that evening. It was just his look of defeat when I told him about Harrison wanting to quit soccer. He was so distraught, and I hated that he thought he was failing his kids. Now I understood that it ran even deeper, and he thought he was failing his father’s memory as well.
As much as I’d rather be in my comfortable shorty pajamas, I kept my day clothes on. My nanny uniform of jeans and a cotton blouse was unsexy enough to be safe but still looked better than sweats and a t-shirt.
When Will joined me a few minutes after nine with a big bowl of popcorn and a plate of fresh brownies, I had crammed myself into the farthest corner of the big sofa. He rolled his eyes and barely suppressed a laugh but took the hint and sat at the other end.
I started the episode, and we chatted about the show as well as some of the harmless neighborhood gossip I got from the other nannies. It turned out the kid who tried to ruin Christmas for Harrison got busted for smoking on his school grounds and was currently serving a suspension.
“Karma,” Will said, eyes full of fire. “He can smoke the coal he gets in his stocking.”
I laughed so hard at the vigor in his voice that I nearly choked on brownie crumbs. “Remind me never to get on your bad side,” I said.
He reached for the bowl of popcorn which was down by me, and I slid it over to him. He took a handful and sent it back my way, only to want more a few minutes later.
“This is ridiculous,” he said, scooting closer.
We were still a respectable distance apart, and the big ceramic bowl was firmly between us, but now he was close enough for me to smell his cologne. I loved the rich, sea air scent so much that if I knew what it was I’d go to the nearest department store for a sample to put on my pillowcases. I knew most of the reason I loved it so much was because Will wore it, and it reminded me of our night together. I really didn’t need to be thinking about that, not when he was within grabbing distance.
It didn’t help that I kept catching him sneaking glances at me, which meant he was catching me sneaking glances at him. Even when I forced myself to keep my eyes straight forward, I could feel him looking at me, and it made me far warmer than the nice, air conditioned room warranted. Our hands brushed in the popcorn bowl a few times when we both reached in at once, and the feel of his fingers against mine made my breath hitch. I knew all too well what those fingers of his could make me feel, and I wanted that again.