He stepped in front of me to block my view. “I’ll clean up the room. I don’t remember…”
“It’s fine.” I sighed and stepped around him. “Not anything I haven’t seen before, definitely something I’ll see again.”
The truth was I loathed this part of the job. I wanted to help make movies come alive, be there to adjust the lighting, direct a facial expression, make a viewer get lost in something that had the potential to change their life. Instead, I cleaned up mess after mess in the hopes I would get closer by working with actors.
“Meek, I don’t remember half the night in this hotel room.”
I snuck a look at him. Even standing there with his shoulders slumped, the body of that man after a drunken night’s sleep was still perfection. He scratched the scruff of his five o’clock shadow, and my body reacted like any woman’s would. He was what made movies blockbusters—his muscles, his strong jaw, his full lips.
It was a glaring reminder, like a bucket of ice water being thrown on me, that we could never, ever work. A pin up model belonged next to him and even if I was competitive in nature, I was also logical. We weren’t compatible.
I grabbed a few pieces of clothing that looked like his and threw them to him. “Do you remember who you were with last night? Any damage control I have to do?” I wondered if he remembered what I saw in the pictures, if he knew he’d been caught doing lines in the bathroom, with his hand up the woman’s skirt. I tried not to shudder at the thought.
“I think the biggest damage control is that you saw me with her, Meek. I know you got Dougie but we need to talk.”
My heart hammered. I glanced around the room, not wanting to meet his eyes, not wanting to admit to myself that I wanted to hear what he had to say. Dougie and I would work through things and I didn’t need Jay swooping in as a distraction.
“Little Pebble, she wasn’t you, she wasn’t like kissing you…”
I bit my lip.
Damn.
My body wanted to go to him. I wanted to scream at him that he was right, that she wasn’t me. And how could he risk it all on another night like this with another woman?
A woman that wasn’t me.
I reminded myself it should have never been me though. He was planting this little seed in my heart where he had no business doing so. I didn’t want my love for him to flourish beyond a friendship or beyond the mistake we’d already made.
I cleared my throat, ready to dig up the seed and toss it far away where it belonged. I picked up a knocked-over chair to push it back under the table. “Jay, that was weeks ago. It’s not something we ever need to bring up again. No need to try to soothe my ego.” I reminded myself that’s what he was doing anyway. “You get a pass from me, I’m your friend, not a woman you’ve slept with who’s trying to stick around. Honestly, just pass go, collect $200 and forget all about it.”
“A pass?” He cocked his head. Then he strode over to me. His chest brushed up against my arm and I gripped the top of the chair, trying to stave off any reaction to his proximity. He ran his finger and thumb over a strand of my hair as if feeling the weight of it. “Little Pebble, you know I’m not going to forget that kiss for the next decade. We don’t have to talk about it. We don’t have to bring it up. But you need to know: I won’t forget it. I’m sorry it happened that way. I’ve had a few bad nights in the past month and that was one of them. I shouldn’t have put you in that position. So, if it’s a pass you’re handing out, I guess I’ll take what I can get.”
I held my breath. The pain in my side stopped. It felt like the beating of my heart stopped too. I wanted to believe the words so badly, my body leaned toward him as he said them. It was a toxic, damning situation to be in, though. Jay couldn’t commit; he was the farthest thing from commitment I’d ever encountered. “I think it’s good to just move on. It was a bump in the road with lots of alcohol involved.”
He narrowed his eyes like he was about to disagree but then he said, “Does Dougie know?”
“Does he know what?” I jolted away from him at the mention of my boyfriend’s name.
His brow furrowed. “Did you tell him about us?”
“Of course. It’s fine.” The words tumbled out of me and I tried to wave off the growing ball of anxiety in my stomach. “My clients get out of hand all the time.”
“Wait.” His shoulders bunched. “Who?”
“You’re kidding me, right?”
He had the audacity to tsk at me like he had the right to put himself in a different bucket than all the others. “Has Johnny tried something with you? Did someone step over the line?”
I wanted to scream at him. “Isn’t that the pot calling the kettle black? Can you please just get ready so that we can go?”
He held his ground, tried to wither down my resolve with his stare, but I didn’t fold under it anymore. Jaydon Stonewood came from an astute, ruthless family of businessmen. I knew his father had run most of Chicago with investments and then his brother took over. They played their cards right, they handled large deals, and they always, always seemed to win the war of who was a bigger man.
Yet, Jaydon didn’t know a man’s competition had nothing on the strength of a woman. I’d have stood my ground for days to prove my point. Add on to that, my mother and I had many a standoff. His retreat was inevitable.
He backed away without a word. We straightened the hotel room. I found more than one line on the kitchen counter, two more in the bathroom and remnants on the bedroom nightstand. As I cleaned the last one up, he mumbled, “It got out of hand last night. I’m… it’s not usually this bad.”
I nodded. “Okay, Jay.” I didn’t need to fight him. Kicking a wounded animal when they were down was never productive.