I didn’t respond. It wasn’t my job to make her feel comfortable. “Jaydon and I have some business to work on this morning.”
Her amber eyes scanned me as if I was her opponent. I didn’t wiggle in my blouse and skinny jeans.
“I believe you said Jay told you to find your clothes.” I kept my voice monotone and slid my leather bag from my shoulders to pull out a stack of papers. “Do you need help with that? And also, did you happen to sign an NDA?”
The leggy woman put a hand on her bony hip, still standing there in lingerie. “I told Jay he didn’t need that with me.”
“Nevertheless, I’d appreciate you—”
“He still had security make me sign one. Now I see why, if you always hound him like this.” She sneered as she bent at her waist. “But guess what? I don’t want anything more from him. You know why?”
I packed up my bag, trying not to engage. The zipper that usually slid closed so quickly snagged on a paper. I pulled it back but didn’t get any traction.
“Honey, him in a bed is good enough. Him between my legs…”
Jay ambled out of the bathroom with just sweatpants on, drying his dark mussed hair. Water droplets beaded on his chest.
“Mikka.” His voice cracked like the guilt was breaking it. “I told the bellboy I would be ready in twenty minutes…”
Seeing him and knowing she’d been with him just weeks after he’d had his lips on mine cut as deep as the woman wanted it to. It exposed feelings I wanted to keep covered up and left them raw, broken, and unattended on the hotel floor.
“And I received his message, Jay.” I looked down and shoved the zipper harder as I realized my vision was blurring under tears I definitely couldn’t shed.
I wasn’t Jaydon’s type, or anyone’s type in LA really. I was naturally thin but my muscles weren’t tanned and toned like the woman who stood there in all her half-dressed glory.
LA accepted me anyway. Not based on appearance but based on performance.
My clients trusted me to go above and beyond for them. I did. Every single time.
Specifically for Jay.
Specifically for America’s royalty.
The zipper finally gave way, as did my drive to overcome my sudden lapse in judgement for feeling something for my friend. I stepped over a pillow and my ridiculous feelings to attend to what was important.
“So, for a hotel party, this is pretty mild. We should start cleaning though.” I glanced around and my stare fell on the woman. “Do you need me to call you a car?”
She reared back, her mouth opening and closing when Jay didn’t jump to her defense. She threw up her hands and skittered around grabbing her clothes. “I guess I’ll go then.”
I folded my hands together and waited. I let the awkward silence stretch as the woman turned to him. Jay nodded and some of his manners kicked in. He led her to the door, whispered something charming no doubt as she giggled and then closed the door behind her. Before he turned to me, he leaned his head on the wall. His shoulders moved with the deep breaths he took.
“I’m not here to patronize you, Jay.” Even if I wanted to throw accusations, I couldn’t. I had Dougie and the painful physical reminder of him every time I took a breath.
Jay turned and the muscles in his neck coiled, his abs flexed. I saw pain before I saw the shame. “You should be. Look at my room.”
We both eyed it, me, probably more trepid than him.
“It’s not the best I’ve seen and definitely not the worst.” I measured my words because we were on uneven ground. My words weeks before were directed at him maliciously and I should have chosen them more carefully especially because he was my friend, a friend I didn’t want to lose over a kiss that meant nothing.
I zeroed in on the drugs at the table. They were illegal, glaringly accessible, and served as a reminder that he had a problem, one we had to fix. “Do you want me to clean it up?”
He cracked his knuckles and I swear his eye started twitching. “No, I… can you just give me twenty minutes?”
The shame. It was always a big motivator. I remember the first time my mother used it as a weapon against me. I’d fought her so hard on cleaning my bedroom one day. She finally surrendered. Little did I know she went and invited as many parents of my friends over as she could. When they arrived with their children, my mom directed them to my room.
Never again did I have it a mess.
“Twenty minutes for what, Jay?” I went to grab a white towel from the bathroom and ran water over it. Then I re-entered and started wiping up the powder.