Lines were blurring, walls were falling, barriers were toppling and I think we both knew in that moment we would break down everything between us even if it meant others would be hurt in the process.
It was a dangerous thought, one that chilled me to the bone but brought me more comfort than I’d had in a long time.
Driving to the little girl’s house was all a show for the police officer. I chummed it up while speeding as fast as I could to cut down on minutes wasted. Aubrey stayed quiet in the back but the force of her silence spoke louder than words could have.
When we pulled up to the small house, a tiny wind chime moved in the breeze as we hurried to the porch. As we banged on the door, I took in the kid’s shoes lined up below the wind chime. They were worn in but lined up with care.
We heard a scramble and then a very thin woman who looked depleted of life answered the door.
She squinted into the sun and pushed her dark hair from her face, “Yes?”
Aubrey folded her hands together, as she let the officer ask questions about Ollie.
The mom was defensive. She kept the door between herself and us as if we were there to hurt her. “I don’t know where she is. She was supposed to go over to Margie’s.”
The officer nodded like he believed her. “I know. She’s young and probably ran off, right? She do this before?”
The mom’s dark eyes skittered across the lawn behind us, avoiding meeting any of ours. She answered with a whisper, “I don’t know, I was asleep for a little while.”
I saw Aubrey’s knuckles turning white, her nails dug into her skin. We both knew the mother was lying, but it was a matter of getting the truth. The truth from a skittish, abused individual was earned by staying completely composed.
Aubrey had learned that well.
My hand slid into hers, and I rubbed circles over the half-moons that marked her skin where her nails had been.
She breathed in deep and stepped closer to the woman. The woman immediately moved back and pushed the door to just a crack open. “Ollie doesn’t miss days. We document it. She’s always there. She tells us how sweet you are to let her come all the time. We’re just here to make sure we find her alive and well, no other questions asked.”
The woman assessed her for a long time, so long I thought she’d slam the door on us. Finally, she sighed. “Jerry came by.” She cleared her throat and glanced back at me and the cop before she whispered to Aubrey, “He wanted me to go with him somewhere. I told him to leave. He didn’t want to, so I left him in my living room to go lie down.”
Aubrey nodded, her whole body tensing. “Okay. Was Jerry here with Ollie while you were sleeping?”
“I told him to leave and …” Realization dawned finally on the woman’s face. “I … do you think he would have ... oh, no. He wouldn’t have taken her?”
The officer took down his address and called it in. He was all business now that he knew the situation was being documented. He stayed behind with the mother to make sure she could talk to authorities.
When we arrived at Jerry’s, Aubrey instantly recognized purple sneakers on the front porch, and I held her back as officers arrived and entered the premises.
“She’s going to be okay.” For once though, I had no idea of the outcome. We’d made it there quickly but criminals had an uncanny ability to be quicker.
She stared at the house. “You’ve never been a liar, Jax. Don’t start now.”
I stared at the house, letting my hand fall to her thigh so my fingers could trace circles along that soft spot I knew soothed her.
We’d been here before, in front of a house where devastation probably had occurred, waiting for an outcome we probably didn’t want.
It felt the exact same.
Time slowed.
Sounds faded away.
The red-and-blue lights from the squad car lost their color.
I heard her breathing, mine synced to it.
Her tension vibrated through the air, and the hair on my arms stood up like the vibrations commanded them to.
The difference this time, I kept rubbing circles and kept her close. I knew, this time, nothing would stop me from helping her through the outcome. I'd pick her up wherever she fell.