Not even with Ryan.
Such earnest abandon. As if Breck had been giving part of himself that he rarely gave. And honestly, that would’ve made two of them. Which not only had spiked things higher, but had Kai seriously considering going another round. But not with Breck bound and contained like before. With him flat on his back in Kai’s platform bed. With Kai taking him, repeatedly, deeply, as they continued with that kiss.
Kai’s hand slid lower to suds his hardening shaft, his fingers moving slowly as the memory played on. Breck’s body against his, still damp with sweat, had been intoxicating. Breck would unquestionably make an amazing lover. Would keep Kai very satisfied in the sheets.
Which, incidentally, was the very reason he’d finally ended their kiss. He couldn’t think of Breck like that. He’d get attached. And then his impetuous heart would want a say, which was a bad idea all around.
Sighing, he resumed washing his body. He didn’t like feeling torn. Or the fact that a very real part of him wanted to see where this might go. Breck was into him, showing the signs. Problem was, that wasn’t enough. Not with Breck’s mindset and unique situation. That he was attracted to Kai didnotmean he’d make concessions. Especially where his life goals were concerned. God knew, Ryan certainly hadn’t. Kai refused to be another man’s side gig ever again.
He frowned as water sluiced over his head, suds rushing down his body and into the drain.
Breck wasn’t Ryan, though. He was different.
Maybe hewouldmake concessions. Unlike Ryan, maybe hewanteda companion.
Kai groaned and rubbed his face, then shut off the water. Climbing out of the shower, he reached for a towel.
Bottom line: there was no way to know.
And thus, no concrete way to ever really decide.
Meaning he’d have to play this thing with Breck by ear. Because while a part of him could see Breck in his future, he didn’t like putting his heart on the line. Which made this whole thing like a fork in the road. Maybe tonight would shed some light on which direction to go.
Drying off, he finished things up in the bathroom, then combed his hair back and secured it behind his head. He regarded himself in the mirror. Dark brown eyes stared coolly back, wordlessly relaying one sentiment.I hope you know what you’re doing.
His lips quirked. Because he didn’t. Was flying by the seat of his pants. No plans. Just raw instinct. But sometimes that was the best.
Heading back into his bedroom, he donned the night’s attire; every article, incidentally, black. Black leather pants. Black nylon tee—that, under certain lighting, appeared nearly transparent. Two studded wrist cuffs. A studded belt. And combat boots.
The downstairs buzzer sounded. He descended the steps into his living room, then made his way to the security panel beside his door. “Come on up,” he instructed through the intercom, remotely unlocking things in the vestibule below.
Breck pushed through the door a moment later, dressed as always in athlete-chic. Knee-length basketball shorts and a slightly snug tee.
“Hey.” He smiled. But then he abruptly stilled, his jaw going slack as he regarded Kai’s duds. “Damn,” he mumbled. “Jesus... Look atchu.”
Kai grinned, amused. “Long time, no see.”
Breck tamped a laugh. “Yeah, nearly twenty-four hours.”
“Hungry?”
“No, I’m good. But thanks.”
Kai poured himself some water. “How ’bout a drink.”
“Naw… I think I’m good there, too…” Breck was staring at Kai’s outfit again, his expression a mix of trepidation and blatant desire.
Kai’s body heated under the weight of his stare.
Breck cleared his throat and crossed his arms. “So… what’s the plan?”
“Get you dressed.” Kai took a drink. “Then hit the road.”
Breck shifted his weight, then gestured with his chin. “Am I dressing like you?”
“Sort of.” Kai smiled.
Breck narrowed his eyes. “Don’t make me regret this.”