If I do, I know he’ll break my heart. Not the way Liam did. Liam disgraced me, humiliated me, rejected and hurt me, but I know now that I never could have been happy with him. Connor was what I needed—the man I was meant to have.
If I let him know that, though, the rejection from Liam will be nothing compared to the pain of Connor’s rejection. He’ll tear me apart.
I have to protect myself. And the best way to do that is by doing exactly what he said I should.
Marry him, bed him, give him an heir—and then fall in love with someone else. As many someones as I can until I drown how much I want Connor in a sea of other lovers.
He stops in front of the hotel, the bike idling as I slide off it, unbuckling the helmet. I reach for the collar, yanking it off, and drop it in Connor’s outstretched hand.
“See you on the flight to Dublin,” I snap, and then I turn on my heel, stalking back into the hotel lobby.
I make a beeline for the elevator, my heart racing all over again at the fear that I might be caught, but by now, my father is almost certainly asleep. It’s very late, and my father has always been an ‘early to bed, early to rise’ type of man. As for me, all I want is the comfort and safety of my own room. I don’t want to think about Connor McGregor for a second longer tonight or how he made me feel. It’s made doubly difficult by the fact that this hotel feels as if it’s filled with reminders of him around every corner—most especially the elevator, which I can’t wait to get out of. The moment the chime sounds and the doors open, I burst out of it—and directly into a man’s broad chest, which smells warmly of cedar cologne.
“Ah, slow down there, lass,” a deep voice says, one that I immediately recognize as Niall’s.
Shit. Shit, shit, shit!
If he tells on me, I’m fucked. My father will lock me up until Connor agrees to marry me—possibly quite literally. Not to mention I’ve given him ammunition to use against me now—he has blackmail on me. He could use it to Liam’s benefit somehow if he wanted, I’m sure—
His broad, long-fingered hands close around my upper arms as my mind races, turning me as the elevator doors shut and setting me a few inches away from him. His eyes slide up and down the length of my body, and he lets out a soft whistle, his blue eyes gleaming as he takes in the sight of me.
“Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, Saoirse O’Sullivan. Aye, and I never thought I’d see you dressed like this. Where’ve you been, lass?”
“That’s none of your business,” I manage as regally as I can. It’s hard to feel princess-like while wearing a tight leather dress and hooker-heeled boots with a silk thong all twisted up underneath it, but I do my best.
“Looks like that’s likely true,” Niall smirks. “Still, it’s dangerous to be runnin’ around like this, lass. Anyone could take advantage of you.”
His blue eyes skate over me again, and I feel a strange shiver. I’ve never particularly noticed Niall before—he’s my former fiancé’s right hand. The way I was raised doesn’t give me room to notice things like that. But standing there in the dim light of the hotel hallway, I suddenly notice how sharply handsome his features are, his strong chin and full upper lip covered in black stubble, that same black hair swept to one side, thick and messy atop his head, swooping down above those piercing blue eyes. As he leans forward, one hand against the wall as he looms over me, I notice for the first time how leanly muscled he is, lanky and powerful, his tattooed arms bare. He’s wearing a burgundy t-shirt that looks soft and tight dark jeans, and none of it does anything to hide how he’s built.
“I can take care of myself.” I look up at him, trying not to let my thoughts show on my face.
Niall chuckles. “Aye, I believe that, in some instances. But a lass like you, as valuable as you are? You ought to have protection, especially—”
“Dressed like this? I get it.” I duck out from under his arm, trying to ignore how my heart is suddenly beating in my chest.Can he tell what I’ve been up to tonight?My hair is a mess; truthfully,allof mefeelslike a mess, even if I managed to pull my clothing back together before leaving the club.
Niall chuckles, and something about the deep, raspy sound sends another shiver through me. “Sure you don’t want to tell me what you’ve been up to, lass?”
“And give you something to use against my father and me? No, I don’t think I will.” I tilt my chin up, giving him the most dismissive look I can muster.
“So you were doing something you’re not supposed to be. With Connor McGregor, no doubt.” Niall’s eyes narrow, and I realize with a burst of fear that I’m walking myself into the very trap I’d just mentally warned myself to avoid.
“I was out getting a drink.” To my credit, I manage to keep my voice from trembling. “And now I want to go back to my room. Or are you the type of man who enjoys accosting women in hallways and preventing them from going where they want to?”
Niall smirks. “Saoirse, if I wanted to accost you—” He moves towards me again, and I suck in a breath. He smells like leather and woodsy cologne, making my head swim slightly.
It’s as if a part of me that I kept frozen for years has been thawed out, and I notice things I never have before.
“You’re right,” he says, his voice lowering as he stands an inch from me, the wall very close to my back. “It’s none of my business where you were or what you got up to tonight, Saoirse. Go back to your room, if you wish. You startled me, that’s all, and in that dress—”
I catch a flicker of something on his face, something that isn’t just the heat of lust but longing, too. As if he’s looking at me and seeing something—someone, even—that he desperately wants.
A muscle leaps in his clenched jaw, and he steps back further. “Goodnight, Saoirse,” Niall says tightly. “Sleep well.”
He turns and strides away towards the elevator, his muscled ass flexing in the fitted jeans—and then disappears inside, leaving me standing there.
What the fuck?
I fumble for my keycard in my clutch, turning as quickly as I can in the heeled boots, and hurry down the hall to my own room. I feel almost as if I can’t breathe until I’m safely inside, the door locked behind me, and then I suck in lungfuls of the cool, lavender-scented air, closing my eyes as I will my heart to stop racing.