I turn towards him once the door is closed, opening my mouth to say something to him, but he doesn’t give me a chance. Before I can even breathe, Viktor’s hands are on my waist, pulling me towards him, one hand going up to slide into my hair as his mouth comes crashing down onto mine, hard and hot and fierce.
I should push him away. I should tell him that I can’t, that what’s happened hasn’t changed anything, that the last night we spent together is still the last time I ever planned to go to bed with him for anything other than duty. But he’s kissing me as if he needs me more than he needs to breathe, both his hands in my hair now, clutching my head in his hands as his mouth devours mine hungrily.
I’ve never felt need in him like this before, not even the night that he was afraid he would lose Anika, not even that last night. He pulls me to him, his tongue plunging into my mouth, breathing me in, tasting me, and I can feel how hard he is against me, how every inch of him is so desperate for me that I think he might die if I don’t give in.
Why are you fighting this so hard? Don’t you want this, too?
Everything isn’t fixed between us. It’s not solved, it’s not all made right, not by a long shot. But I remember him standing in that room in the mountain chalet, a bloodied knife in his hand like some avenging god, splattered in Alexei’s blood as he carved the man to pieces for me.
He took everything that Alexei did to me, by proxy and with his own hands, and made him pay for it in flesh. He avenged me, and I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t enjoyed every fucking second of watching him kill for me.
Torture for me.
Make a man bleed, for me.
My bear. My husband.
My Viktor.
I can’t tell him no, and I don’t want to. I can feel some emotion that I’m terrified to put a name to surging inside of me, heating my blood as I arch against him, and when Viktor starts to pull away a fraction, opening his mouth as if to say something, it’s my hands that bury themselves in his hair and drag his lips back to mine, my nails that sink into his scalp as I press myself tightly against him and devour his mouth with mine.
Viktor grabs my waist, lifting me up so that my legs go around his waist, carrying me towards the bed as I kiss him fiercely, letting the desire wash over me, the lust, the need to remember that I’malive. Alexei tried to strip me of everything that made me myself, to erase the deepest parts of me, to sever Viktor and I from each other and make me into a shell of what I once was.
He failed.
Viktor spills me back onto the bed, stretching over me as he follows me down, his chest heaving as he pushes my hair out of my face. “Do you want this?” he asks, his voice deep and rough with need. “After what he did to you—”
I reach up, pressing a finger to his lips. “I need this because of it,” I tell him firmly. “I want you, Viktor.” I wind my arms around his neck, pulling him down to me. “I want you to erase it all,” I whisper against his mouth. “Make me forget. Make me forget everything.”
And he does.
Viktor undresses me slowly, hands caressing my body as if he’s unwrapping a gift, sliding over my breasts and waist and hips until he grasps my thighs, spreading my legs apart as he moves down my body, his eyes hot and dark with lust as he presses his mouth against me, his tongue sliding out against my hot and eager flesh.
I cry out when he licks me, the pleasure bursting across my skin, electric sparks dancing over me as he swirls his tongue expertly over my clit, licking and sucking in all the places that he knows I like best, driving me towards a climax hard and fast, knowing that it’s what I need. I let it come, hands buried in his hair as he sucks my clit into his mouth, thrusting two fingers into my wet and aching pussy as he pushes me over the edge, reminding me what pleasure is, what desire feels like, what it feels like toneedso badly that I’d do anything to have him above me, around me, inside of me.
“Viktor!” I scream his name as I come, thighs clamped around his face, and he keeps sucking as I grind against him, coming hard on his tongue as my back arches and I writhe on the bed, riding the wave of pleasure for as long as I can.
The moment I start to go limp, he pulls back, his eyes dark and wild as he jerks open the fly of his pants, his thick cock springing free as he reaches in to pull it out. “I need you now, Caterina,” he growls. “Lyubov moya,I need you.”
I nod breathlessly, swallowing hard as I reach for him, and he leans over me, pressing his swollen cockhead against my entrance and thrusting into me with one hard, hot slide that sends me into another spasm of pleasure, my body clenching tightly around him as I arch upwards, pressing every inch of flesh that I can against his as I cling to him, moaning aloud with the ecstasy of it.
It feels so fucking good. Soright, no matter what I tell myself. And in this moment, thinking of everything that’s happened between Viktor bringing me to his first safe house and now, I have one thought that rings through my head clearly as he starts to thrust with long, powerful strokes that possess me entirely with each one.
We were meant for each other, he and I.
It would take a strong woman to stand at the side of theUssuri. A woman who can be fearless, who can be brave, who can look at blood and death and pain and not flinch. A woman who can rule, just like him.
I could be that woman, if he’d let me.
Viktor groans above me, his hand cupping my face as he kisses me hard, panting against my mouth. “Caterina,” he whispers, as he stiffens, his back arching as he thrusts into me deeply and holds himself there. “I can’t—bladya, I need—”
His voice breaks as I feel him shudder, his cock going iron-hard inside of me, and I feel him start to come, my body tightening around him in response. He kisses me again, hot and fierce, surging inside of me as he shudders with a ripple of pure pleasure, his cum filling me in a hot rush that sends another wave of pleasure over me too, the sensation almost too much.
“Lyubov moya,” he whispers as he leans against me, still shuddering with the last spasms of his climax. “Caterina. My love.”
The words hit me, sending a flood of emotion through me in an almost dizzying rush, and as Viktor rolls to his side I pull away, my heart pounding.
“Caterina, no.” His arms tighten around me, pulling me closer. “Don’t do this, please.”