Instead of an intense wave of panic at the idea of loving Iris, I feel calm. Love I can work with. I might not know how, but I’m willing to learn. For her andonlyher.
I switch my water for the whiskey. “I feel like I’m going to need something stronger for the rest of this conversation.”
* * *
Whoever saidthe truth will set you freeis a dumbass. My legs feel weighed down by invisible cement blocks as I walk inside the house. I throw the keys on the counter and make my way toward the stairs, only to change paths toward the bright light on the other side of the house.
A lamp in the corner of the living room basks the space in a low light.
Iris, still dressed in my T-shirt, lays sprawled out on the couch with a blanket covering the bottom half of her body. One of her hands still clutches onto her phone as if she is waiting for a call.
She stayed up for you.
I instantly regret my decision to turn off my phone after she called me the first time. It was a rash choice made in the heat of the moment, but it was clearly the wrong one.
I lift her carefully in my arms, being mindful not to wake her with any sudden movements. She mumbles something before snuggling up to my chest. My chest tightens as I look down at her, wondering how the hell I ended up married to a woman like her.
You know how.
My teeth grind together as I let out an agitated breath. Iris’s head bobs with the movement, but she doesn’t stir.
I carry her up the stairs and toward my room. Somehow, I’m able to get her tucked into bed without waking her up, although she mumbles a few things in her sleep about her mom.
I shower before crawling into bed and tugging Iris against me. I intertwine her legs with mine, securing her to my body so she isn’t able to escape in the morning.
34
IRIS
Iwake up sweating and unable to move anything but my head. Somehow, I ended up in Declan’s bed, trapped by his armsandlegs.
The audacity of this man is unrivaled. I try to escape his grasp, but it only seems to make things worse. His arms tighten around me as he mumbles something unintelligible into my hair.
“Declan.” I push against his chest.
“Shh.” He kisses the top of my forehead before releasing a soft sigh.
“Wake up.” I shove him a bit harder, and that seems to do the trick.
He blinks up at the ceiling before looking at me. “Good morning.” His arms remain locked around me, equally as irritating as his legs securing me to his side.
“You can take yourgood morningand shove it up your ass.”
He laughs, and I’m instantly peeved from the way the sound warms my insides like alcohol in the dead of winter.
“Is there a reason I’m in your bed?”
“Because I wanted to be able to do this.”
My back hits the mattress right before his lips press against mine. The kiss is a complete contrast from yesterday’s desperation, and I find myself growing frustrated with how controlled Declan appears. It’s soft, sweet, and far too tame after the kind of sex we had.
How can he kiss me like that after walking out on me? Blood rushes through my ears, making the tips hot.
I shove at his chest. “Get off.”
“No can do.”
“What?”