For her?
For him?
For their baby?
And could he live in a marriage like she was describing? With Cora putting up her damned boundaries all the time?
His chest ached as though something heavy were being placed on it.
Dispassionately, he knew what they had to do, but that was the problem: there was nothing dispassionate about his relationship with Cora; there never had been.
None of this mattered, though. His own feelings would have to be dealt with on his own time. Cora was suffering, right now, this minute, and he’d promised he’d never hurt her. He had to fix it.
14
“COME IN?” SHE DASHED at her eyes quickly, pulling her hair over one shoulder and turning, a weak smile on her face that died when Samir strode into the room.
“We don’t have to do this.”
She blinked at him, confused, her blood pounding through her.
“What?”
“I cannot be the cause of your tears, Cora. I won’t marry you when it’s so clearly the last thing you want.”
Her lips parted, forming a perfect circle of surprise and if she’d had any doubts as to how she felt about Samir, his retraction of the proposal showed her the truth.
“I promised I wouldn’t hurt you, and I have. I won’t do it anymore.”
She spun away from him, the anguish she felt perhaps the worst in her life. She walked a little unsteadily to the foot of the bed and sat down, needing the support.
“So what do we do?” She asked, staring at the wall opposite, trying to breathe normally.
“I…will need to think. By Wednesday, if you are still happy to remain in Al Medina until Wednesday, I hope to have an idea.”
He moved towards her, standing closer, but too far away to touch. “Don’t cry, please.”
She couldn’t help it. Another tear splashed down on her knee. “It’s just hormones,” she promised, even when she knew the real culprit was her breaking heart.
He made a gruff noise and then he was crouching down in front of her, one hand lightly on her knee, as though he was uncertain about his right to touch her. Where had the man gone from the jet, who’d promised to kiss her into honesty any time she said she hated him?
She couldn’t meet his eyes.
“I will fix this. It will be okay.”
“How?” She whispered, knowing that wasn’t true. For as long as she loved him, she would feel like this.
His response was to lightly stroke her leg, reassuringly, his own eyes transfixed by his hand moving over the soft fabric of her pants.
“There is no alternative, Samir. You’re right about that. No matter how I feel, or you feel, we owe it to our baby to do this. I have to marry you.”
Samir made another noise, this one angrier, one of disbelief. “Don’t say that.”
“It’s the truth.”
“It makes my skin crawl to think of you marrying me because youhaveto. I will not allow it.”
Her eyes widened and now, finally, she looked into his face and saw his emotions, every bit as turbulent as hers.