It wasn't my intention to follow Elijah outside and make out in front of Minton Hall. But, in my head, I had this brilliant plan that I was going to confront him as soon as I had the perfect opportunity. My life isn't going to be spent looking over my shoulder because some guy I had a crush on stumbles back into my life, even if he’s all grown up and acting like a psycho-nut.
My gullibility makes me want to scream until my jaw cracks. Did I really think I could stare Elijah down without a visceral reaction? Not with our history. Not when the feelings I have for him have flooded back into my heart. There's no escaping that once-in-a-lifetime emotion. And what the fuck was that line about being a cockteaser?Hekissedme.
I slip back into class, sit down in my seat, and keep my gaze off him. It's time to start focusing on the future, not the past, and the Kodak internship sounds like a serious chance to be noticed. I take my phone and start brainstorming ideas, putting my thoughts down in notes as I consider what I can shoot. Of course, I'll document my rundown neighborhood. It's tripping with plenty of edgy subjects. While everyone is photographing the campus, I'll have something unique to show off.
There are perks to being a college student. And one of them is being able to leave class early without permission or giving an explanation. The only camera is on my phone, and it isn't safe walking around with my attention glued to it. I need to borrow an old camera that no one will steal. But is it worth it to call my dad and ask to borrow one of his? I walk toward the campus shuttle and decide the answer is yes if I want to win.
I don't notice the nuttiness brewing on the corner when I get off the shuttle and walk down my street. I hear the shouts of a woman, but I can distinguish trouble from drama reasonably quickly. The beats of my surroundings remain consistent. I know which times of day the sane people are out and minding their own business or when it's not a bright idea to walk to the corner store alone. It pisses me off that I can't be alone. Why is Elijah harassing me? What did I ever do to him? I thought we had been in love.
In a few steps, I'm in my building and heading upstairs. Briefly, I think about Lucas and how he nags me constantly to call for a ride. I can't imagine him wanting to climb into his Rover to come to get me late at night when I wouldn't even give him a kiss good night. And even if I had, it would never compare to the one I just got. Great, now I'm thinking about Elijah again.
"What time is it?" Amanda frowns down at her smartwatch when she sees me walk into our apartment. "I thought Wednesday was your late night."
I quickly debate telling Amanda that my crush from long ago is in my class, but I'll have to explain who he is and why it's a big problem. Unfortunately, I don't have the strength to dive in.
"Kodak is offering an internship," I reply, hanging up my coat. "I want to call my dad and ask him to borrow a camera."
"That's popping the lid off the issue bottle," replies Amanda. "Are you sure you want to go there?"
I nod. "I should call my dad every once in a while. Maybe he won't give me too much grief if I call home on a schedule."
Amanda frowns. "Can you go home and get the camera? Because if he sees where you live, the man will lose his shit."
I look around the apartment. On the inside, it's cozy, with plenty of healthy plants and bulky furniture that makes a person want to curl up with a playlist and a cup of decaf. I wish I could airlift the building into a safer neighborhood.
"I'll just call and see what he has first. He used to have a lot of cameras." I sit down on the couch and don't touch my phone. Staring mindlessly at the TV, I'm back at the lake house, and memories of my last summer with Elijah invade my mind.
***
“Take another picture of me.” I pose at the end of the pier before I dive off into the clear water. I paddle out a few feet, treading water, and look back at Elijah, who snaps another picture. “You have to promise me that you’ll delete the crappy ones.”
He smiles, taking the bulky digital camera away from his face. “That will be tough. You look good in all of them, Livi.”
He’s such a liar. I stick my tongue out at him, and he snaps it. “No!” I squeal, paddling back toward the pier. I climb up and chase after him, but I can barely keep up. He grew over the winter, and now Elijah towers over my head. Laughing and panting, I continue to chase him. He backs away from me, his wiry body in a pair of denim cutoffs.
I stop chasing him and leave the pier, taking my towel with me and sitting down on the grass. He lays down beside me and holds the camera up, scanning through the pictures. I stare at Elijah’s chest. It’s not flat anymore. His muscles etch into his chest, across his shoulders, and pop on his arms.
I keep staring at him until he starts to laugh. “What is it?” I poke him. My finger presses against a solid bicep. “Are you laughing at me?”
His blue eyes sparkle in the bright sunlight as he puts the camera down. “You keep checking me out.”
“I’m not,” I protest weakly. I wrap the towel around my body. “Leave me alone.”
He sits up, and he’s so close I can smell the sweat on his skin, and I want to press my lips against his. He’s so warm to the touch.
“I don’t mind if you look,” he whispers, his gaze lowering to my growing breasts under my bikini top. “I don’t mind if you look at all.”
***
My father is willing to mail one of his old digital cameras to the school. Unfortunately, he won’t mail it to my apartment, just in case it’s stolen, so I give him my P.O. box number at the campus post office. I hardly check my P.O., and when I do, it’s filled with flyers for events that have come and gone.
Our conversation is wonderfully short, and that’s a surprise. The usual questions regarding health are asked and if there’s anything new. Dad tells me the town gossip since I left a year ago. But he never talks about Elijah, the only topic I’m curious about.
Cautiously, I bring it up. “Dad, do you remember the Harlows?” Silence is his reply, and I check the screen to see if the call is connected. “Dad?”
“Why are you asking about them?”
The truth would be the easiest explanation, but it will freak dad out if he hears how much Elijah has changed. I try to sound lighthearted as my knees start to shake. “Not for any reason, except I thought about going to the lake again, maybe to take pictures.”