Ican’t sleep. I should have known it was a lost cause before even trying, but hope springs eternal. Even now. I can’t stop thinking about all the new information this night brought, trying to puzzle through it to figure out what’s true and what’s manipulation. The possibility it mightallbe true is…
I don’t know what to think.
Even though I know I should stay in the relative safety of my room, eventually my rushing thoughts demand movement. If I can just work off some of this frantically circling energy, then maybe something will make sense.
Or that’s what I tell myself as I pad barefoot down the hallway. Dawn already lightens the horizon, another night having passed with us at a standstill. I press my forehead to the thick glass of the window and breathe slowly. The coolness does nothing to douse my thoughts, my feelings.
I want Malachi.
It takesso muchto admit that truth to myself. I don’t like it. It’s inconvenient and messy, but itisthe truth. I meant what I said before—there is no way for this thing between us to play out that doesn’t end in heartbreak. It’s an impossible situation.
But then, my entire life is an impossible situation. I’ve had no choice, no recourse,nothingthat was mine and mine alone. Every single thing I’ve done is a reaction with the intent to survive.
What if I simply… said yes? Took what Malachi is offering? Took my chances with this small slice of pleasure?
I lift my head and sigh. I’m looking for an excuse to fuck him. Maybe I just need to stop trying to reason my way through it and simplydoit.
I don’t make the decision to head for the stairs. My body simply moves on its own, each step taking me closer to Malachi’s bedroom on the third floor. Am I really going to do this? I don’t know. I just don’t know.
A sound cuts through my inner turmoil. A soft grunt. I stop short. It almost sounds like someone’s in pain, but even without much personal experience with it, I know what fucking sounds like. I should turn around. Should take the humiliation heating my cheeks and let it increase the distance between me and Malachi’s room.
I don’t. I walk down the hallway. The door is cracked, which feels almost like an invitation to press two fingers to the thick wood and push it open a few inches more. Just enough to see his bed. Just enough to see what he’s doing to Wolf in it.
My breath stalls in my chest and my feet sprout roots to hold me in place. Both men are naked. Wolf is on his hands and knees, each muscle in his lean body looking carved from stone as he shoves himself back against Malachi. No. That’s not what he’s doing. He’s shoving himself back onto Malachi’s cock.
And Malachi?
Gods, he’s a masterpiece. His thick hair is flung over one shoulder and his big body is one hard line, his ass flexing with each thrust as he takes Wolf’s ass. It’s brutal and they both look angry, as if they started a fight and ended up fucking despite themselves.
I should leave. Should walk away. Should do anything but stand here and watch like the worst kind of voyeur.
I wait for hurt or betrayal to rise, but there’s nothing. He told me, after all. He and Wolf are friends who are sometimes more. No matter what Malachi wants from me, he obviously wants Wolf, too. I don’t understand their history, don’t really get how they can be so antagonistic and still seem to care about each other.
Wolf turns his head and meets my gaze. His eyes are the same crimson they were in the library and he grins, flashing fang. He opens his mouth, but I don’t wait around to hear whatever he’s about to say.
I turn and flee.
Each step brings a recrimination with it. Coward. Fool. Weakling. I say I want Malachi, but then the second I get the hint of an invitation to join in and I’m fleeing like a scared little girl.
I stop short at the top of the stairs. What am I doing? I make a decision and then instantly backtrack? Is that really what I’m made of? I close my eyes and take several deep breaths. I’ll just talk to Malachi about it tomorrow like a reasonable person. That’s a logical way to proceed. A nice easy pace.
“What a little coward you are.”
I startle and start to tip down the stairs. My stomach goes weightless and I start to curl in on myself to minimize the damage I’m about to receive.
Rough hands grab my upper arms and yank me back to the relative safety of the third floor landing. Back against a naked chest. I don’t have to look to know it’s Wolf. He’s shorter and leaner than Malachi. And even after only one encounter with him, I recognize the casual cruelty in the amused tone of his voice.
“Let me go.”
“Is that any way to say thank you? You might be hardier than a human, but a broken neck is still a broken neck.” Wolf doesn’t release me. He buries his nose in my neck and inhales deeply. “Gods, you smell good. Or rather, your blood smells good. How you managed to survive this long while walking around like the best kind of candy is beyond me.” His lips brush my throat. “Someone should have sucked you dry by now.”
I swallow hard, the movement pressing my throat more firmly against his fangs. “Wolf.”
“I like the way you say my name, love.” He doesn’t move back, but he also doesn’t close that last minuscule distance between us to draw blood. “Makes me think I’ll like it even more if you say it while I’m inside you.”
I shiver. “You seemed busy.”
“I am. Malachi and I just hit pause for a brief moment.” He gentles his grip on my upper arm and then his thumbs brush the sides of my breasts. “It’d be a shame if you got the wrong idea. That look back there was an invitation.” He eases me back more firmly against his chest. His cock presses against my ass, which is right around the moment when I realize he’s still naked. “Join us.”