“Don’t the collars share their feelings?”
I nodded.
“It’s not like they could lie. It’s not like on Earth when you don’t know if a guy’s just lying for sex.”
I shifted in the beanbag, bringing my knee up so I could face her. “I knew. I felt the truth. They showed it to me. Then they left for their meeting and… well, there wasn’t time.”
She squeezed my shoulder. “And now?”
I touched the collar again.
“Now I’m alone here.” I sighed. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean that you and Wulf and the kids aren’t my family and I’m not alone. But… I know what having mates is like. I almost had my own family, and now I want it. Want what you and Wulf have. What Nik and Sam offered.”
Olivia was quiet as she studied me. “Yeah, it’s not the same thing.”
“I came here to be with you guys. I don’t regret it, but now I know what I’m missing. You have a life with Wulf. I don’t have anything here. I’m just the fifth wheel.”
“I know it’s too soon, but you could mate someone else.”
I didn’t want anyone else, but I couldn’t tell Olivia that. Instead I rolled my eyes and tried for some levity. “That would only work if Wulf lays off his big-brother thing.”
As if he knew we were talking about him, the playroom door slid open and he came in, his head almost grazing the top. “Who’s hunting Hive?” His voice boomed through the room, and Tanner and Wyatt froze, spun in place and raised their hands.
Wulf went over and dropped to his knees so he was closer to their height. “Did you look behind the ship?”
They nodded, their heads bobbing in unison.
“We should check again because Hive are known to be tricky and devious. Climb on, fighters.”
Wulf dropped to his hands, and Tanner and Wyatt climbed on as if riding a horse. Wulf crawled toward the back of the room. “Weapons ready!”
“Braun’s interested,” Olivia said, smiling at her mate’s antics. He was a good father, a good role model for the boys. Emma chased after them, tugging on Wulf’s arm until he grinned and lifted her up to sit on the back of his neck where she squealed, pointed and screamed, “Go!”
“Wulf threatened to beat him bloody in the pit if he even breathed near me,” I reminded.
“He still talked with you… when Wulf wasn’t around.” She rubbed her arms as if the topic made her as uncomfortable as it was making me. “He would worship you. You know he would. You may not be the one for each other, but you could be happy.”
I sighed. “Braun’s sweet, Liv. You know that. He’s a nice guy, but I’m not for him. God, he’s like a big brother. I know it, and I think he knows it, too. That Atlan is a looker, and I’m sure he’ll claim some female in that hot up-against-the-wall sort of way. It just won’t be me.”
Olivia fanned herself, probably remembering the time Wulf carried her out of the Bachelor Beast studio… on live TV.
“I think Braun feels stuck, like me,” I admitted.
“You’re not stuck. You’ve got big plans.”
Shaking my head, I looked at my lap. “I did everyone’s hair and makeup for the party. It was so much fun. Sure, I cut hair for Rachel, you and the others, but there’s less than ten women on the planet. I can’t run a spa for ten women.”
Olivia laughed, tugged on one of my curls. “I’d come every day.”
I rolled my eyes, thought of Sam and how he’d found my hair… wild. “Whatever. No women, no spa.”
She scrunched up her face, then smiled when Emma came running over. She climbed into Olivia’s lap as the boys continued to play with Wulf.
“Think you want to go back to Earth, then? You’re the only one of us who has that choice.”
That was a good question. Did I? Unlike Olivia, I was able to go back. I could start up a spa like I wanted. I knew how it should be done. How to get a business license and a loan and everything. There, I could do it. But after being in space, I wasn’t sure if it was for me.
“I’m different, Liv. Two nights with two guys and I had everything. I’d say yes to being claimed. I was willing to leave here, leave you for two hot studs.”