Chapter Five
Amelie
The funeral was nice, as far as funerals go. I mean, I barely even knew the guy. He was definitely part of my brother’s crowd. And while I used to try and tag-along with him and Smalls, they definitely had friends I didn’t know about. Judging by their reaction, I wouldn’t have said this guy was a good friend, but then, why would they ask me to come to the funeral for support if they weren’t cut up about his death?
There’s so much I don’t know about Smalls and Aadi’s life. I always knew they sheltered me from a lot. But the crowd gathered today look like some unsavoury characters. Eyes roamed over my body most of the day much to Kalen’s disgust. I have to beg him to drop it. I’m even pretty sure I see a few plain clothed cops watching from a distance.
My father’s house is packed to the brim with men I don’t know, all drinking and telling stories. Chelsea manages to wrangle Kalen into helping her bring out food. I scan the crowd but can’t find Smalls anywhere. He’s a big dude so he isn’t easily missed.
As I head upstairs, the sound of laughter and the beat of some Eminem song fade away. Smalls is sitting on his bed, his hands covering his face. I take a seat beside him, placing my hand on his leg. It’s a gesture I’ve done a million times before, but somehow now it feels wrong. He looks up at me from under his thick lashes, his brown eyes full of sadness. Maybe he is more cut up about this than I originally thought.
“Are you okay?” I ask, and he nods.
“Sometimes this life isn’t fair Amelie. It just sucks that his life was cut short. He had a girl at home...and a son.” He leans forward and places his forehead against mine. “I’ll be okay.”
“You know, you really should go shower. You reek of alcohol, pot, and a teenage boy just hitting puberty.”
He laughs at my comment. “I’m glad you came back,” he says, standing.
“I’m happy too, even if it is under shitty circumstances. Kalen did have to drag me here though.”
“He doesn’t seem so bad – typical rich boy – but not bad. I’m glad you’re happy. But watch out for Aadi. He hasn’t forgotten about Christmas morning, and he may be planning a surprise for your boy.”
“I could tell by the look in his eyes. He thinks he’s sneaky, but he can’t fool me.”
Smalls laughs. He has always tried to be Switzerland between our pranks.
“Can I ask you something?” Smalls asks hesitantly.
“Sure. Shoot.” I try to keep my tone neutral but a little dread creeps in. I hope he’s not going to question my relationship with the guys.
“Are you coming back? Here, I mean. When you graduate?”
“I—”
“I thought so. It’s okay you know. I could tell. You were just so damn eager to get on that plane when that teacher dude showed up. You practically ran for the door.”
“It wasn’t like that. At all.”
“Amelie, you’re a runner. Shit got real with your dad, and instead of sorting it out like an adult, you ran like a baby.”
“First, babies can’t run.”
“You sound like that asshole downstairs.”
“And second, it wasn’t like that at all. They told me that the teacher died. He died, Smalls. And while I logically know that you can’t die from eating a few dozen cookies with Weed in them, I...I wanted to save you.”
“The dude was diabetic or had some underlying medical condition. That’s why he died.”
“It doesn’t matter. I thought you were going to prison if I told the truth, and I couldn’t handle that.” I pause and consider his words. Then I confess, “I ran when Onyx was hurt too. Not when I found him. But when help came and they said he might not make it, I—”
“Sssh, it’s okay. I can understand that with everything that’s happened to you. He will too. But are you telling me that the only reason you went back was because you were trying to save me?”
I shrug. I mean, I’m glad I did. But it’s not the only reason.
“You know I’d do it a hundred times over for you and Aadi. But I also have unfinished business.”
“With them?”