“Impregnateyou?” A look of understanding came over his face and he made a low, rumbling sound that was obviously amused. After a moment, I realized he waslaughingat me, the big bastard!
“You think this is funny?” I demanded, glaring up at him. “Make it stop! You’re supposed to be my owner sohelp me!”
I hoped that by appealing to his pet-owner instincts, I might get some other result than just laughter. But the gray giant just kept rumbling.
“Little one,” he said at last, still chuckling. “Just let the washing arm go so it can do its job. It’s not trying to fill you with seed—it simply wants to wash and dry you.”
“It…it what?” I was nearly at the end of my strength. The silver toilet tentacle wasstrong,and I didn’t know how much longer I could hold it. I glared up at him. “I don’t believe you! If it only wants to clean me, then why is it holding me down? I nodded at the other tentacle, still wrapped around my waist.
“You must have activated the safety and auto-cleaning mechanisms when you climbed up,” my captor said, pointing down to the glowing bricks at my feet. “They’re usually meant for children. If you’ll simply let the cleaner go, it will do its job and you’ll be released.”
I didn’t know if I believed him, but at that moment I lost my grip on the second tentacle. Probably because my hands were getting sweaty and slick and my strength was giving out.
I gasped and tensed up as the tentacle at last dived between my legs. I was expecting it to shove itself into me, just like they do in thehentaivids, so I was braced for the worst.
Instead, I felt a spray of warm water showering my sensitive areas. It did a thorough job of cleaning me—both front and back—and then the water was replaced by a warm gust of air which dried me thoroughly. After that, the second tentacle withdrew and the first tentacle unwound itself from around my waist, freeing me at last.
With a little cry, I launched myself off the alien toilet. I didn’t care that my worst fears hadn’t been realized—I felt traumatized by the whole experience and all I wanted was to get as far from the strange contraption as possible.
My captor caught me before I hit the ground and picked me up to hold me in his arms.
“Let me go! Let me down!” I exclaimed, beating my fists on his broad chest.
He only shook his head.
“Calm down, little one—you’re safe enough.”
“No, I’m not—let me go!” I insisted.
“I don’t think so.” He frowned thoughtfully. “You’re a clever one, aren’t you? First you escape your crate, and then you use the facilities to relieve yourself. However did you manage? Maybe it has something to do with theLa-ti-zalpowers the Commercians claimed you have.”
“I don’t have any kind of superpowers!” I said sulkily. “I just had to pee really freaking bad!”
He shook his head. “Ihadheard of some people training their pets to use the toilet, but I hadn’t really thought it was possible. It’s convenient though—at least I won’t have to change the lining in your crate.”
He was looking at me the same way someone might watch a viral video where some clever pet owner has taught their cat to use the commode and then flush afterwards. And to be honest, it made me freakingmad.
“For the last time, I amnotan animal!” I spat at him.
“All non-Korrigans are animals—lesser beings,” he said absently. “But I am not here to argue with you, little one—it is beneath me. However, since you are here in the bathing area, it seems like a good time to give you a bath.”
“What? I don’t need a bath!” I exclaimed, writhing in his arms. “I just took a shower this morning!”
“On your home planet of Earth,” he reminded me. “Which has some unique bacteria, since it has been locked away from the rest of the universe for so long. I will bathe you with a solution that will render them harmless and also form a protective coating on your fragile skin, which will keep you safe on the alien worlds I plan to visit.”
“What? No!” I exclaimed. “I don’t want any kind of coating—I just want to gohome!”
“Thisisyour home now and I am your Master,” he said, giving me a stern look. “You seem to be a very intelligent pet, so I will give you a choice, little one. You can either behave yourself and have your bath now, or I can lock you in your crate for a few moreahrnsandthenyou can have your bath. Either way, you’re getting bathed.”
I could tell that he meant it. It was the look in those full-black eyes of his and the way his eyebrows were drawn low. It was amazing how expressive his eyes were, considering there was no pupil or iris—or at least, none that I could see.
“Could I at least bathe myself?” I asked, wilting in his arms. “I’m perfectly capable—I do it every day back home.”
He frowned and shook his head.
“As a responsible pet owner, I must see to your wellbeing myself. You might miss some areas if you’re allowed to try taking a bath on your own.”
“But—” I began, but he was already putting me down into the hot tub-sized bathtub and turning on the water.