As ready as I was for a verbal assault, I deflated at Knix's words. I watched as Bellamy nodded once, then stalked over to the sedan where Grayson was already waiting in the passenger seat. I was shocked that he had even followed Knix’s orders. Not Bellamy, but Grayson. He hadn’t yelled or argued, but he’d taken Knix’s chastising quietly and gracefully, which was very unlike him. Was heokay?
“Harlow?” Knix disrupted my thoughts, and I looked up as he opened the passenger side door to the SUV. “Let’s get out ofhere.”
I grimaced but nodded, and then proceeded to climb and lift myself into the high seat. Knix closed my door behind me as we turned and watched Bellamy and Grayson pull out of the parking lot. I wondered if Bellamy would say anything as they made their way back. Or if Graysonwould.
* * *
The moment Knix and I were alone he turned and leaned over the console. I jumped out of shock as he pressed his lips to mine. His big hand closed over my shoulder and he squeezed, pulling me closer. I moved into him without even realizing what I was doing. How could these guys make me lose my mind just by simply kissing me? Maybe it was my lack of experience with guys before knowing them. But I sure was making up for thatnow.
Knix's kiss swept me away. It was rougher than the first kiss we had shared, almost desperate. My heartbeat thudded against the inside of my ribcage. I closed my eyes and sank into the feel of his soft lips pressing mine open. He pulled back and tilted his head, his hand moving around to the back of my neck. As if I would back away. As if I would want him to stop. I didn't. I fell into the kiss and let him move against me. I found myself gravitating towards him like a small planet circling the sun. He was pulling me closer, yanking me deep into thekiss.
My hands closed around the collar of his shirt, and I gripped the fabric tight, dragging myself closer. I was halfway over the console, but so was he. The interior of the SUV was hot, our breaths combining as our mouths opened and we dove into each other. I gasped when Knix's hand slid back down to my arm and then even further. His fingers searched for the seatbelt and when he realized I had yet to do it, he gripped my hip and then half dragged, half pulled me over into his lap. Something hard pressed against my thigh. My head was spinning, my mind dizzy. I pulled back, but Knix's mouth followed, seeking meout.
"Harlow," Knix's rough whisper against my lips made me shudder in his arms. I finally managed to tug myself away from his mouth. As I sucked in air, panting, Knix's lips trailed against my jawline and then to the column of my throat. He left wet, open-mouthed kisses against my skin and when he got to the sensitive place where shoulder met neck, he sucked hard and I arched up into his touch. Sharp electric sparks drove themselves into my veins. My breasts ached. The place between my legs criedout.
I had to stop this. Didn’t I? No matter how badly my body didn’t want to—how badlyIdidn’t want to—I knew that I needed to pull away. It was Knix who finally managed to pull away and I had to force myself not to dive for his mouth again. My skin tingled where his big hand cupped my thigh and where his other arm pressed against my back as we both took heavy, unevenbreaths.
“That was—” he started before he had to stop and swallow. “I’m sorry,” he continued, “I didn’t mean for it to get so out ofhand.”
A heady feeling thrummed in my veins. I blinked and bit my bottom lip to keep from whimpering as he set me away from him—returning me to my seat. I clenched my thighs together, but nothing would assuage the tender feeling between them. My cheeks flamed red when Knix looked at me. I turned my face away, trying to slow the rise and fall of mychest.
“Are you okay?” heasked.
I swallowed and licked my lips before finally turning to meet his gaze. "I'm fine," I rasped. Knix took a moment to look me over as if he didn't quite believe me, but he eventually just let it go, and rested back against his ownseat.
"I was really worried something had happened to you when you didn't answer us," hesaid.
"We were already inside by the time you guys startedcalling."
He nodded. "Yes, I gathered that, but still..." Knix grimaced and after a beat of silence, he sighed. "I know Grayson's heart is in the right place," he paused before adding, "most of thetime."
"I get where he's coming from," I said quietly. "It does feel like we're not doing enough. Every time I go to class or sleep in my dorm room, I feel like I'm moving on without Erika and it makes me feel like a crap best friend." The admission hurt to say aloud, but it needed to be said. Even though my chest ached, at least I had gotten my thoughts out and now he knew. If anyone should know, it was Knix. Knix would know what to do. He was the leader, the fixer. I looked at him to gauge hisreaction.
"Grayson is too wild right now, Harlow," he said. "I understand that you worry about your friend, but we can't go in, guns blazing. That's not how we operate. I promise you this though, Little Bit." Knix reached over and lifted my chin with his thumb and forefinger. "You're a part of us and Erika is a part of you. We will find her and we will helpher."
My eyes burned with unshed tears. I hadn't known just how badly I had needed to hear him—to just hear someone—say that, but now that it was said, it eased something inside of me. His confidence gave me confidence. I sniffed hard and gave Knix a waterysmile.
"Thank you." He smiled back, leaning over to brush his firm lips softly across mine. It was unexpected and sweet, like ice cream on a hot summer night. I reached for his hand and twined my fingers with his as I kissed him back. When we parted, though, there was still something more I needed tosay.
"I want Grayson to be inIris."
Knix pulled back and reached for the ignition. The SUV rumbled to life and only when he put the car into gear and began rolling towards the parking lot exit, did he speak. "Why?" heasked.
I reached for my seatbelt and buckled up. "Because I think he needs it," Ireplied.
Knix raised both eyebrows as we turned onto the street, heading back towards the house. "You think he needs it?" he repeated curiously. "Did he sayanything?"
I shook my head. "Not exactly. He told me that whatever he did to make Marv hate him so much, he didn't want to do it, but he had to. You didn't see him Knix; you didn't see his face. I think he regrets being unable to join up with Iris. I mean, think about it. Why else would he want me to be socautious?"
Knix frowned and turned to face me as we rolled up to a red light. "You believe that he's jealous of your opportunity inIris?"
"No, that's not it," I continued. "He practically said that after he and Marv had that falling out, he was cut off from Iris. Before, he was supposed to be in it though,right?"
The light turned green and the car rolled forward. "According to his file, he withdrew his interest among other things," Knixadmitted.
I blinked. "There are files?" Tilting my head to the side, I squinted in his direction. "Is there one on me? Can I see it?" Knix's lips quirked as he turned down another street. I sighed. "Right, never mind." That wasn't the point. "The point is," I said, “I’m pretty sure Grayson never actually lost interest. His withdrawal is because of whatever happened with Marv. And that's not really grounds for him being eliminated as a possibility, is it?" I still wasn't a hundred percent sure. I had been given information, but it wasn't like I could pull up everything I had learned about Iris at the drop of ahat.
"No, but things have changed," Knix reminded me. "Grayson has changed. Does he even want to be in Iris? Did you askhim?"