Chapter 2
Gavin
I'dknowhervoice anywhere. It’s a voice I thought I’d never hear again. Of all the people to run into here at Oakside, I never dreamed it would be Lauren.
Her scent fills the room. It wraps around me and makes me feel safe for a moment. Honey and strawberries with a hint of the cherry chopstick she likes to wear. It's nice to know she hasn't changed.
Lauren is the girl I never got over. I loved her with my whole heart, and if I'm being honest, I still love her. Those feelings are as strong at this very moment as they were the day I left.
In time, I thought we'd live our lives and realize we weren't meant to be. I'm sure she’s moved on. But apparently, my logic was horrible because those feelings were merely dormant. They aren’t gone. The moment she stepped back into the picture, there they were.
I was a fool to think there was anyone else out there for me. Even if I didn't want to admit it, I knew it back then. I'm scared to voice it out loud now. It's been years. I'm sure she's changed, and I won't feel the same for her in a few days or weeks.
I never thought I was good enough for Lauren, and I’m sure as hell not good enough for her now. Not that it matters, as she's probably found some great guy, finished school, and started a life. Maybe even built a family. She deserves to be happy, and I won't do anything to jeopardize it. But if she's going to be the one to help me heal and find my way out of this hellhole, I'm not turning it down.
This is going to be heaven and hell all wrapped up in a nice neat little package. Heaven because I’ll get to be around her, and hell because she’s no longer mine.
She's probably on the phone with her boyfriend, making dinner or weekend plans. I always wanted her happy and knew she’d date other people when we broke up. But I don't like it one bit now I’m faced with it. It was easier knowing I wouldn't see it because I wasn't here.
But there's no one else I'd rather have at my side right now. I don’t have a long list of people that could be here for me. I grew up in foster care, and the few friends I made in the service are still deployed. She's also the last person in the world I want to see me like this. I'd rather she remember me as I was the day I walked away and ruined us.
It's for the best she's moved on and is happy. If she isn't single, the temptation to try to start over won't be there.
Hearing a knock on the door, I freeze. She’s back.
But a fraction of a second later, I know it's not her. The footsteps are different, and the perfume isn't hers.
"Hey, Gavin, I wanted to check on you before your session with Lauren," Kaitlyn says.
She's my nurse and so much nicer than the one at the hospital. The people at Oakside seem to care more. They have more time to listen and get to know you. But Kaitlyn is also forcing me to do so much more on my own, which is annoying, even if I know it has to happen.
"I'm good. I guess I need to get my shoes on."
Kaitlyn walks across the room to the closet, grabs my shoes, and hands them to me. Something simple, like putting on shoes, takes me a few extra minutes, but it's a task I can do myself.
It's funny how I take the little victories now. Putting on shoes is something most people are annoyed they have to stop and do, but it’s one of my few victories.
"You’ll like Lauren. She'll be great at helping you get back on solid ground."
"She’s good at anything she puts her mind to," I say without thinking.
Kaitlyn stops moving around the room, and I instantly know I let too much slip. "What?"
I sigh and shake my head."We went to school together way back when."
I'm not willing to admit more than that. Hopefully, she’ll drop it. Kaitlyn is good at reading a situation.
"Oh, that's great. This is a small town, but you start to realize what a small world it is when we keep having patients run into people they know." Kaitlyn says, wrapping her hand around my wrist and taking my pulse.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, Easton, our head of security was one of the first patients here. Noah was the only one who could get through to him but only for short periods of time. Then in walks Paisley, his best friend’s sister, and now his new wife."
We’re both quiet while she takes my blood pressure and listens with the cold stethoscope on my skin.
"Anyway, in walks Paisley, and it's like she flipped a switch and was able to reach him on a level none of us could. Paisley says it's because we all have that one person we would walk through hell for, and it takes that person to pull us out of our dark moments. For Easton, it was Paisley. For Noah, it was Lexi. Who is it for you?"
Lauren's face comes to mind instantly. She was the person I thought of when I was stuck on deployments or going into dangerous situations. Everything I did was to keep her safe.