"But—"
"No buts. Okay, Luna?'
I nod.
"Good, now…" He steps away from me, turning around and bending down to get a small box off the ground. I see a small flower inside, realizing it's my corsage. A beautiful bunch of pale petals, elegant and perfect. Not too big, nor too small. I hold out my wrist, and he slides it on gently. He holds my wrist afterward, trailing his fingers along my palm. My breath stops, the pads of his fingers gentle and firm at the same time. Then he lets go of my hand, and it falls to my side.
"Ready?"
No, I'm not ready. Not at all.
"Ready."
The dance is torturous. Long and chaotic. People with smiling faces, slightly red-rimmed eyes from the secret alcohol they’ve snuck in, skin glistening from the stuffy auditorium. Everything is perfect… for them.
Roman and I haven’t done anything besides dance. No refreshments, no visiting with our classmates. Straight out of the limo, he brought me to the middle of the dance floor. Wrapping his arms around me tightly, his palms feeling every curve of my sides and waist, pulling me until not an inch of air separated us. This is how we’ve been, where we’ve been, for hours now.
Roman's arms wrap around me, holding me close to his body asTime After Timeby Cyndi Lauper plays through the speakers. My cheek rests against Roman's chest, and his hands rub against my naked shoulders. His skin grazes mine gently, a caress full of love that only Roman provides. "I love you, Luna."
I don't say anything, nuzzling closer to him. I just want to stay like this forever. Stay wrapped in his arms and never leave.But I have to.
I never want this night to end.
"Are you ready to go to the hotel?" he asks, not stopping his dancing. "We should go," he adds after I don’t answer him.
I nod my head against his chest, knowing that once we leave here, I'll be one step closer to Roman leaving me. I take a large, shaky breath and separate from him. "Okay."
He pulls back, his fingers wrapped around my arms as he gives me a sad smile. With a breath that’s just as unsure as I’m feeling, he pulls me along while he says goodbye to everyone important. He tells his friends to meet tomorrow morning at his house so they can load up their new van to take off.
Nora sees me and walks up to me, a sympathetic look on her face. She knows me. She knows how every step has been difficult, nearly impossible with the amount of pain I’m feeling. My heart is leaving me, and she can see it in my gray eyes. Wrapping her small arms around me, she whispers, "It'll be okay. I'll sit with you in your room and cry all day tomorrow if you want, okay? Just have a good night tonight."
I nod, giving her a squeeze before releasing her and walking back up to Roman. He waits for me by the entrance, outstretching his hand to lace his fingers through mine. He pulls me along, and we hop into the limo, driving silently the twenty minutes it takes to get to the hotel outside of town.
It smells like leather in here, the limo so large, easily fitting twelve people, possibly more. There are lights throughout, like we should be throwing a party. Instead, we’re quiet, not saying a word as Roman’s side leans up against mine, his arm tossed over my shoulder while he holds me tightly. We look out opposite windows, not sure what to say, not wanting another minute to pass, wishing we could freeze time.
Once the limo pulls up to the front door, Roman passes the driver a few dollars and hops out, grabbing the small bags he must have shoved in there earlier. I don't remember packing a bag. I wonder if my mom or Nora packed it for me.
But who knows, I could have packed it myself. I've been so out of it lately, it's not totally out of the question.
I stand silently beside Roman as he checks in, grabbing two keys from the front desk before bringing me to the elevator. The hotel is nice, soft muted tones and a cream-colored carpet. It smells like cleaner in here, and I realize this is one of the nicer hotels Roman must have gotten for us. Soft music plays from the ceiling as we wander through the lobby, our feet silent as we walk. A grand piano sits in the corner of the room, and I imagine Roman playing it, a soft tune breaking across the room with me sitting on top of the shiny wood, my legs crossed over one another as tears leak down my cheeks.
We hop inside the elevator and Roman stands behind me, snaking a hand around my waist as he presses a kiss to my naked shoulder. "You doing okay?"
I nod, faking a smile for him. "I'm okay."
"No, you're not." He knows me too well. "But it's okay. I'm not okay either."
The music is louder in the elevator, drowning out my lonesome thoughts. I tap my toes to the upbeat music until the elevator dings, snapping me out of my trance. As the doors roll open, Roman grabs my hand, pulling me along the patterned yellow and red carpeted hallway until he finds our room.
He slides the key card in the door, and when it clicks, the red dot turning to green, he presses down on the handle to open it. I walk in ahead of him, glancing around the nicely-sized room. The bathroom is directly to the left, and what looks to be a coat closet on the right. The same patterned carpet extends into our small suite. There's only a double bed which sits in the middle of the room, with a grayish poufy-looking comforter and two white pillows at the head of the bed. Two small nightstands sit on each side with lamps on them. In front of the bed is a small table with a Bible in the center. There's also a TV stand with a small boxy TV sitting on top.
It smells like clean linens and air freshener in here.
"This is it." Roman sets our bags at the foot of the bed, loosening his tie and taking his coat off before he tosses it onto the foot of the bed. He looks up at me as he untucks his crisp white shirt and lifts his hand to his wrist, unbuttoning the sleeves. "What do you want to do? Want to watch TV? You tired? Hungry?"
I fold my arms across my chest. "I could kind of use a bath. Or a shower. I'm kind of cold and want to wash the school off me."
He chuckles at that, nodding his head. It was stuffy in there, crammed with a bunch of sweaty teenagers. "Want to take a bath? I can see if there's bubbles or something."