“WHAT?”
“Listen—”
“What?!”
“It’s—”
“What?”
“I—”
“What?!”
I sigh. “Okay, Reike. Let me know when you’re done.”
My sister yells “What?!” eight more times. “Okay, it’s out of my system. Let us resume. So, you and The Wardass smooched—”
“Feels like there should be a better word for that.”
“You sucked faces. Exchanged germs. Swapped saliva. Canoodled. Snogged.”
“The other day you told me in great detail about that Ukrainian guy you pegged, and I didn’t make half the fuss.”
“It’s different.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m a seasoned pegger, but you never do this. You were all like, ‘Neuro’s my wife now, zip up my chastity belt, dig a moat around the Bee-fence,’ and now you’re making out with your nemesis who is apparently into you—”
“Was. Was into me. And it’s just a kiss.” If I say it enough, maybe it’ll erase how close I got to being naked with Levi on my kitchen floor. How I’ve been obsessing over his whereabouts all day long.
“FYI, I’ll return to the States for your wedding, but I recently discovered the bridezilla subreddit, and I’m not going to dye my hair blond to fit the ceremony’s color scheme—”
“Not happening.”
“Right, you’d probably ask for teal green—still a resounding no.”
“Reike, it was just... a kiss. He doesn’t care. And I have no intention of caring ever again. One round of returning wedding gifts was enough.”
“I never got mine back!”
“You never sent one. Anyway, it was just a kiss. Purely...” Physical. Burning. Good. Electric. Obscene. Heavy. Dangerous. Good. Wild. Good, good, good. The most erotic moment of my life. But my head has cooled off, I’m not a horny black hole of sexual tension anymore, and I can see how dumb it was. A stupid idea. Three out of ten, would not do again. Plus, I have other concerns. BLINK. My job. Who’ll feed Félicette once I’m gone. “Nothing. Purely nothing.”
“Right. Emotions are still scary. Boundary maintenance is a priority. The Bee-fence is up in arms. So when you see him at work tomorrow—”
“I’ll be too busy building the best damn helmet this world has ever seen and securing myself a lifetime of professional stability. Away from Trevor.”
“Of course. And I assume The Wardass is perfectly okay pretending that—”
A knock at my door and I glance at the time—10:28 p.m. “Gotta go. It’s probably Rocío coming to reiterate that I’m not her real mother. Or that after you die the enzymes in your digestive tract devour your body from the inside.”
“Of all your colleagues, this girl is my absolute favorite.”
“She was caught porking. On my desk.”
“How does she constantly top herself?”
I roll my eyes. “Bye, Reike.”