Chapter Ten
Caroline gave herself over to John’s care with a soft sigh. She adored it when he kissed her; there was something unexplainable about the mystery of it, that two mouths when met produced the most amazing sensations.
And oh, the way his chest and upper body had felt beneath her fingertips! There was so much banked power there, such muscle and she hadn’t been nearly done exploring. She wanted time to examine the tattoo on his chest in order to copy the exact artwork into her own.
While he moved over her lips, licking, sucking, nibbling as if he wished to memorize their shape, she furrowed her fingers through the hair at his nape. It was one of her favorite parts of him, along with his mouth, his chest, his ridged abdomen, his shoulders…
Pulling slightly away, she stared into his face with a smile. “I feel… different when with you I am. Lighter. Like singing.”
“Good.” That special grin of his returned. “Come.” John hopped onto the bed and then made himself comfortable propped against a bevy of pillows. “Sit here with me.” He patted the mattress at his left side. “I think it’s time I showed you how titillating and powerful a simple touch can be.”
Hiking up her skirting, Caroline climbed onto the bed and then crawled over to his position. “What now?”
“This.” He leaned forward, put his hands on either side of her waist, and hauled her to him so that she reclined back against his chest between his splayed legs.
“Oh, dear.” Trembles ran up and down her spine.
“Relax. You trust me, correct?”
“Yes.” It was much different from when she was in the water with him in the pond. Now she was pressed intimately against him, sitting between his legs while he rested his large hands on her belly. Very nonthreatening but her senses were on alert. Anticipation and wariness prickled her skin. “This is…” Odd yet comforting. She’d never been so close to a man before and had certainly never been in such a position. While at the asylum, male doctors had given perfunctory examinations, and she’d touched her cousins’ hands on occasion, but none of those interactions had made her feel as if she were preparing to jump off a precipice into the unknown.
“Yes?” His voice rumbled in her ear, tickling it, and provoking another set of tingles.
“It is… interesting.” She skated her fingers along one of his forearms. So strong—protective. “You won’t hurt me?”
“Never.” His lips glanced along the side of her neck. “Tell me what you’re feeling. Let me help you be more comfortable with me.”
“I’m feeling frightened.” It was honest. She concentrated on her next words so they wouldn’t come out jumbled. “I wish I was brave, John. Like you.” If she was, she wouldn’t want to launch off the bed merely due to his proximity.
His chuckle sent butterflies awaking in her belly. “I am not brave.”
“You are. You sailed. You were in the navy. Were hurt.” She’d seen the various scars on his body. “I can never be that.”
“Does being near me make you feel afraid?” He splayed the fingers of one hand over her torso just beneath her breasts.
Her heartbeat quickened. “Yes. No.” She shivered. “I don’t know.”
“Then you must practice being brave a few minutes each day. After that, you might still feel fear, but you’ll have the knowledge to conquer it.”
She reveled in the sound of his voice as well as the nautical scent of him. “How?” If she had her druthers, he would read to her for hours and she could lose herself in his tone. Thus far, they’d walked the acreage and toured the manor. At the end of the day, she’d given into exhaustion and slept.
John shrugged. “Do one thing that frightens you. Every day.”
“Everything frightens me.” Even sitting here more or less surrounded by his big presence. What if she came to rely on him too much and he left? What if he discovered he’d made a mistake by marrying her?
“Such gammon.” He closed his lips on her earlobe and chuckled when she squeaked. “You have been doing brave things since we married. Hell, going through with the vows started that change.” Slowly, he eased his hands up her arms leaving gooseflesh in his wake. “You went into the pond with me. You’ve let me kiss you. And lastly, you practically ordered me to strip down and touch you.”
Caroline couldn’t help her smile even if the feel of his hands on her shoulders made her slightly breathless. “You were brave too. Believed I was worth nose hairs.”
“I beg your pardon?” He hooked his thumbs beneath her neckline near her collarbones.
Merciful heavens!“I meant notice.” Drat, but it was difficult enough to concentrate without his particular brand of distraction.
“You are. Never doubt it.” He pressed his lips to a spot beneath her jaw and when he nibbled on the skin there, she shivered with unexpected delight. Then, bit by bit, John tugged at the bodice of her dress. He slid the whole upper portion down, down, down, along her arms until her breasts were bared.
“John?” Confusion and fear were evident to her own ears in that one-word inquiry.
“If at any time you grow too uncomfortable, bid me nay and I’ll cease.”