What the hell did that mean? Did he assume his cousin wasn’t attractive or that either of them would ever think of the other with desire? An image of Caroline in that moonbeam gown from the night of the rout danced into his head. She’d been attractive in a wholesome way, and he really was coming to adore the way a tiny dimple appeared in her left cheek when she smiled.
Hadleigh remained unconvinced. “I’m not certain that’s what my cousin needs or even if she can comprehend the complexities of what you’re offering.” His eyes narrowed. “You don’t love her. She might not understand.”
For the love of all that’s holy!
“There is only one way to find out.” Low-grade anger buzzed at the base of John’s spine as he pushed through the ring of annoyed Stormes. Taking her away for a holiday would open doors to her she didn’t have access to currently. Hell, if marriage was what it took to gain Caroline’s freedom, he’d gladly do it. He strode across the room and once in front of Caroline, dropped down onto one knee. “Caroline, you’ve heard what we are talking about.”
She nodded, her eyes round and twin spots of color blazing on her cheeks.
He captured one of her hands in his. “We hardly know each other, but I feel in my heart that removing you from London is what will help you grow and find yourself.”
“But it’s not forever,” she said as her eyebrows drew together.
“What, the move or our engagement?” Slight panic took hold of his chest. What if she didn’t go along with the plan? What would happen to her then, for there was no way Hadleigh would ever let him see her again.
“First, the move.” Her lips curved into a smile. “London is noisy and big and dirty.”
“That it is.” The trust in her face humbled him, and since he had no answer to either of her questions, he plowed ahead. “If your priggish cousin won’t let you escape London, I shall do it myself and vow to take care of you in the best way that I can.”
The earl sputtered, but they both ignored him.
John searched her eyes but found nothing except curiosity and excitement there. “I suspect no one in your life has given you the freedom to explore and accept the woman you are, so I intend to do just that. Will you agree to a betrothal between us?”
Another round of gasps circulated about the room.
Caroline’s hand shook in his, but there was an impish light in her eyes. “Convenience, an engagement?”
“If you’d like.” He nodded with enthusiasm. “You can break it at any time if you find the arrangement unbearable. I merely wish to give you a chance where no one else will.”
“Why?”
“Why what?”
She smiled. “Why would you do this? I am…” Her gaze jogged off to one side as she searched for words. “…No one special.”
“You’re wrong.” He tightened his grip on her hand. “Everyone is valuable in this world. Some of us just need the right encouragement to find that realization.” Yet did she understand that this wasn’t a permanent arrangement and that it would never lead to a real marriage? For he certainly didn’t wish for a wife out of fear he would follow in his father’s footsteps.
For long moments she stared at him as if she might study a painting. Finally, she nodded. “Do you promise not to send me back to the asylum, if you cannot understand me?”
“Absolutely I won’t.” That she would think he might tightened his chest. “Locking you away due to the fact that your mind doesn’t work like other people’s is ridiculous.”
“Or beat me,” she added with a flicker of fear in those blue-gray depths.
That gave him pause while a few of the Stormes protested. What happened to her during her tenure in that asylum? “Perish the thought.”
“You will read to me?”
“As much as you’d like.” For whatever reason, he looked forward to such a domestic situation.
“Let me paint you?”
He pulled a face. “If it will make you happy.”
“Then, I agree.”
“Thank you.” As John rose to his feet, he released her hand. Then, he sought out the earl while excited chatter broke out amidst the family. “I am now engaged to your cousin. According to your own words, I can take her to the countryside for a short holiday.”
“I believe I said if.” Hadleigh’s expression was this side of shrewd, and John didn’t much care for it. “As this exaggerated tableau has played out, I’ve had cause to think more on it.” He nodded. “And as such, I’ve come to my final decision.”