“No.” Finn shook his head. “I apologize if it is distasteful.”
“We all have bodily functions. I’m not embarrassed.” Nimble fingers undid the pins at the sides. She let down the front of the towel and then took his member in her hand while he watched. Though he couldn’t feel her working him over, he saw it, and that in itself sent heated desire through his chest, to say nothing of the thoughts racing in his mind.
Did every man think it the height of scandal to witness a woman fondle their bits? His breath caught when she gathered her hair over one shoulder and then slowly, oh so slowly took his hardening shaft into her mouth. He lost the ability to breathe, to swallow, to think, to exist as she bobbed up and down his length. Oh, God, it was too much even though he couldn’t feel it, as he remembered what the act had been like. He hooked a hand around her nape and guided her more fully onto his erection.
“Jane…” She met his gaze as she worked him over. Amusement sparkled in those emerald depths as if she were having the most marvelous time. Every shattered piece of his heart came back together, glued into place by the love she selflessly gave. Tears crowded his throat. If she didn’t leave off, his chest would burst open, he was certain of it.
How was it possible to feel so differently during intercourse yet experience the same intensity?
She came off him and slanted him a look that brimmed with naughtiness. The raw need shadowing her face gave rise to his own. “Quickly, put on your ring. If I don’t have you right now, I’m going to explode.” The urgency in her voice quickened his pulse.
Knowing that this woman wanted him so badly both exhilarated and humbled him, and he fell deeper into love with her. “I’ll be a moment.” Finn fumbled for the decorative box on his bedside table. When he grabbed the sheath and ring, he fit the supple leather to his shaft and tied the loop around his stones as fast as he could. The result was a proud, stiff erection that saluted the ceiling, ready and waiting. “Ride me, my lady.”
“Gladly.” Jane’s eyes held a slightly crazed look, a clear testament to her desire. “You understand I don’t want you merely to stem my desire, don’t you? I need you for much more than sexual congress.” She mounted him, her knees on either side of his hips, and when she took him in hand, he gasped.
How well he remembered what it used to feel like. “I want you to glean everything you need from me, like I do from you.”
“We’re well matched.” Then she moved, bouncing up and down his length, ever faster, always deeper. Her glorious full breasts jiggled, tempting him.
Finn took them in his hands, squeezing, kneading, worrying the stiff tips with the pads of his thumbs. When she leaned over him, her hair and her breasts dragged over his chest. A moan escaped him. God, the sensation was exquisite and quite torturous at the same time. The new position must have hit the right place, for Jane shuddered and gyrated her hips against his, rocking faster and more urgently. He gripped her waist, helping when he could, watching her as she unabashedly took enjoyment from the act of joining with him.
Tears sprang to his eyes. She was magnificent, and he loved her. So much. Not once had she let his reality prevent her from befriending him, loving him, enjoying his company, pushing him to be the man only she saw. He’d put those barriers around himself, but never more would they—or his doubts and fears—come between them.
“Finn, yes! Oh, oh yes!” Her body stiffened. She cried out as she found release, hard if her joyous, light-filled expression was any indication. Shivers racked her form, then she collapsed against him, her ragged breathing tickling his ear.
Odd sensations whooshed over him. Heat filled him like a wave, an all-consuming fire. His ears roared. Tingles danced over his arms, ushering in gooseflesh, and the most intense pleasure pushed through his chest, his head, heating his neck and face. Finn gawked at the ceiling as his upper body shuddered and a sense of repletion sank into him. Was it possible he was spending yet in a different way than he’d known before? When one didn’t concentrate on one’s shaft and stones, was this how it felt?
“This is… fascinating and amazing,” he managed to whisper through the pulses.
And so peaceful. He took a shaky breath, wrapping his arms around her. Perhaps he could have a fulfilled sexual life after all. Never would he have discovered that until the advent of Jane. Because she persisted and refused to give up on him.
I love her.
Eventually, she moved off him with a soft sigh. “I don’t think I’ll be able to move for a while.” Exhaustion wove through her voice.
“Then I must have done something right.” Finn removed the cock ring and sheath from his flagging member. After tossing the aid into the box, he pulled her tight against him. “Thank you.”
“What for?” Her body, snuggled into his, made him grin. She rested a hand on his chest and her head on his shoulder. “You deserved the coupling as much as I did.”
“Not for that.” Gently, he brushed locks of her silky hair from her face so he could press a kiss to her temple. “For never giving up on me.”
“I couldn’t. Since the first, I’ve felt a connection between us.”
So had he, but he’d been too much a coward to recognize it for what it was. “You peered into the heart of this Storme and completely stole it, but there is something I would say to you.”
“I’m listening.” Her warm breath skated over his chest and renewed his awareness of her.
“When I’d thought you’d choose Ballantrae over me, I was afraid, for if I lost you, I might revert to the man I was before I met you, the man trapped by depression and racked with bitterness, a man without hope.” His throat constricted, for it was difficult to share his most private thoughts. They didn’t reflect well on him. “I need your sun and your warmth.”
Her fingers stilled on his chest. “How can I be that when you nearly left my life that night, Finn? When you assumed no one cared about you, that I didn’t care?” The waver in her voice tugged at his heart. “Tough times will come. Setbacks too, but you can’t think to solve each one of those by attempting to kill yourself. That isn’t the answer.”
“I know that now. Because of you.” He cleared his throat. “You’ve completely changed how I think, how I look at life… and my family.”
“Life has changed for us both,” she said softly. “As I’ve given you light, you have shared your darkness with me. We’re in balance. You’ve opened my eyes, ripped the blinders from them and forced me to look at the world differently.” She lifted on one arm to hold his gaze. “I’m not the same woman I was when we met.”
“No, you’re better.” And he hoped to God he could make her happy.
“No.”