Oh, dear heavens, the smell!Only slightly familiar with a dirty baby nappie, for she’d never had reason to be, the stench of a grown man’s excrement caused her to dry heave while the other two continued what was undoubtedly a familiar conversation. The mess in the garment was still warm and she could barely look at it as she scurried over the floor to the bucket. However, she was the only one reacting in such a way, and embarrassment fired deep in her cheeks.
I’m better than this, aren’t I?She had no idea if she meant her reaction or the chore.
With no one to rescue her from the task, she plunged the soiled fabric into the water and swished it around until the worst of the mess had fallen away. Finn’s words from the other day rang in her ears. You’ll have to get your hands dirty to make a considerable difference. Had he meant in this type of situation? While she scrunched up her nose and squeezed the excess water from the garment, she shoved all thoughts and feelings away. Then she threw the fabric into the assigned bin, retrieved a fresh cloth, and returned to the soldier’s cot.
Miss Clark glanced up at her with an encouraging smile. “Thank you.” She gave one more swipe of the rag to the man’s privates. It came away faintly soiled. “If you’d like to dress the area, I’ll lift his hips.”
“All right.” Jane attempted to school her features into a mask of bland indifference as the nurse hefted the man’s hips. She slipped the unfolded garment beneath his hairy buttocks.
“Go ahead and look your fill, my lady. I’m not ashamed,” he joked while he gripped the sides of the cot to assist in moving his body so she could wrap the makeshift drawers about his thighs and equipage.
Her cheeks continued to burn, and she wouldn’t look him in the eyes. “I’d rather not. Thank you.” She took one of the pins Miss Clark handed her and did her best to close one side of the modified diaper, but her fingers fumbled so much with them both watching, she mucked it up.
“It’s difficult your first time.” Gently, the nurse batted her hands out of the way and then deftly manipulated the pin. “Fold over the side and stab all layers of cloth through.” She did the same with the other side. “Twice a week, men like Mr. Sumtner come to the clinic for muscle exercises and a bath. It’s oftentimes the only chance they have of cleaning the area, which is important for personal hygiene.”
Jane merely nodded, for she’d been rendered speechless. The blinders fell from her eyes, for she realized how privileged members of the ton were to have valets and other servants that would assist in daily bathing and exercise. What a terrible person I’ve been to think my silly talk of cheerful attitudes would help. “I appreciate the tutelage.” Why weren’t laws passed in Parliament that would render aid to these men who’d given so much for King and country?
“Don’t worry. The more experience you gain, the easier it will be.” Miss Clark patted her hand and flashed her a tentative smile. “We could surely use another set of hands around here.”
“So I gathered.” She swallowed around the lump of tears in her throat. “I’ll endeavor to volunteer more of my time.” No matter how uncomfortable it made her.
“I’m glad to hear that.”
“Me too, my lady.” The soldier blew her a kiss. “Having a glimpse of those bosoms does wonders for my attitude.” He winked.
Jane fled the room as Miss Clark said, “Time for your exercise, Mr. Sumtner, so let’s get you dressed. How naughty you are to tease the lady.”
Back in the main room, Trey happened to catch her eye as his group broke up.
“If you don’t mind, little sis, could you check Mr. Wolmack’s arm dressing? We’ve had a surge of new patients arrive in the last half hour, and I don’t have time to do it.”
“I’d be happy to.” That she knew how to do and was familiar with, but it didn’t mean she enjoyed the task. Once she’d gathered the correct supplies, she stopped at a chair where the soldier sat. “Let’s see how progress had been.”
The older man nodded. “It doesn’t seem to heal properly.”
“Tell me again how you injured yourself.” Jane unwound the bandage currently on his forearm. The wound, though not oozing pus or blood, looked decidedly angry, and the certain smell that arose from it nearly had her emptying the contents of her stomach right there. She swallowed the hot saliva several times to ward off retching.
“I’m a bricklayer by trade. One of the buggers fell off a wall and hit me. Tore through my sleeve and left a big gash behind some three weeks ago. Haven’t had the coin to see a doctor.” He met her gaze. “Someone told me about this clinic. I’m leaving my father’s watch for the surgeon here as payment.” His eyes filled with tears. “Hoping it’s enough.”
Oh, dear God. When will the abject poverty and class separation stop?She nodded. His arm was hot to the touch, which meant infection. “You’ll need to have Doctor Marsden take a look at this, and definitely will need a salve.” Her stomach heaved and she stood abruptly. The supplies tumbled from her lap. “I’ll let him know you’re here.”
Needing an escape, she’d barely told Royce about the man as she passed him in the short corridor that led to his exam room. Then she pushed against a door that dumped her into the alley behind the clinic. Without finesse or dignity, Jane cast up her accounts into a scraggly bush. She continued to heave until there was nothing left to give. Tears streamed down her face as she wiped her mouth with a portion of the apron’s skirt.
Belatedly, she remembered she’d need to scrub her hands with the astringent soap kept on the premises before and after tending to patients, but instead, she stumbled to the few steps she’d tripped down to reach the alley and she sat hard upon them. Now she fully understood more of what Finn struggled with, and the reality of it was horrible.
She wept for the injustice of it all, for the plight of all those men inside the clinic, for every forgotten man that society had turned their collective backs upon and pretended not to see, and when she had no more tears, she sat on those steps and let her heart break.
I need to do better, to use my position in society to help these people.Only by her example—her brothers’ work—would she draw the ton’s attention to the problem. Until there was sweeping reform in the country, she could—would—make a difference one person at a time.
Finally, with a shuddering sigh, she stood and reentered the clinic and stopped to thoroughly wash her hands in one of the many basins.
When she returned to the main room, the man she’d helped was gone. Hopefully, Royce had taken him back to the exam area, for the both of them were nowhere in the common room, but as the baby fine hairs on her nape quivered, she scanned the room and gasped. Her heart leaped. Finn was there. He chatted with the man in the Bath chair that she and Miss Clark had bathed, and from the intensity of their expressions, they were engrossed in whatever the conversation was.
He never looked her way, and she didn’t wish to disturb him, for he needed to socialize with others like him. All the same, silly pleasure welled within her chest. Had he come to see her or to visit the clinic for his injury? A new thought stole her happiness at seeing him. Had he injured himself again?
With half her attention on Finn, she drifted over to a battered wooden desk and slipped into the chair behind it. Various folders lay stacked in disarray containing the charts and notes of the current patients of the clinic. Quickly, she sorted them alphabetically and then pulled the two of the men she’d seen that afternoon. While she jotted down notes of what treatment they’d been given, she kept an eye on Finn. When he laughed at something the other man said, she unexpectedly lost a piece of her heart to him, for all that he’d experienced, for the fact he was here at all, for the miracle that he seemed to be helping the other man.
Across the room, Trey met her gaze and lifted an eyebrow in question then gestured with his head at Finn. Jane shrugged, but she smiled. Oh, she was smitten by the man, true enough. It wasn’t a bad thing, but there was a definite challenge ahead.