****
“I didn’t like doing that,” Jonah said a few hours later after Raven had gotten herself together and left.
Jonah had insisted she stay, but she’d been determined to go about her business. He’d also attempted to raise the option of counseling, but she’d shot that down as well.
Smokey and Carlos stepped out of the storage closet where they’d been hiding. Carlos felt sick. One glance at Smokey, and he had a feeling the other man wasn’t feeling too good either.
Neither of them realized just how fucking … damaged Raven was.
This went beyond Abriana’s prospect, or Ava’s false accusation. No, this was Raven’s torment as a child. The death of her mother. The fucking bastards who had used her and had gotten away with it. Raven was destroying herself. She didn’t think she was good enough to live.
Carlos ran a hand down his face. He hadn’t seen it.
And now all he wanted to do was make this right.
“Thank you,” Smokey said, shaking the man’s hand.
“Help her,” Jonah said. “I … I’m going to try to heal her, but this is … it’s going to need the both of you to heal her.”
Smokey nodded, and Carlos still couldn’t fucking speak. He needed to kill. To hurt every single bastard who had ever hurt Raven. The only two people left were himself and Smokey.
They left the priest’s home and set off down the street. Larissa was waiting for them at the diner. It was where they parked their car and bike.
Larissa had gone to Smokey, saying that she felt Raven needed a friend. She’d been suffering from morning sickness, but it was more than that. Something deeper. Larissa had been right.
Neither of them spoke as they walked into town. Carlos couldn’t think of anything to say. Raven needed them. He couldn’t believe he had never seen her do that with the revolver. But Smokey had given her the task of taking care of him. Of keeping him alive, and she’d done that, so many times.
Larissa waited for them in the diner. Big Dick was keeping her company. The club brother frowned incessantly while Larissa just looked happy.
The moment Big Dick caught sight of Smokey, he stood and left the diner. Sliding into the booth on the opposite side of Larissa, the young woman smiled at them.
“Thank you,” Smokey said.
“You’re welcome. I love Raven. She is really nice and has always been there for me, but I think she misses the club.” Larissa reached out, putting a hand on Smokey’s and then on his. “I hope this was able to help you in some way.”
He didn’t think it had helped him. If anything, all it had done was serve to torment him further. Carlos had to find a way to reach Raven. To make her see she was everything, and that he loved her so fucking much. That he’d been so desperate for her, he’d made that fucked-up agreement with Smokey.
Drago was riding his ass to get home. They had the information from Big Dick of where to find Marchetti. He had responsibilities back home, but he wasn’t leaving, not without Raven.
What he had come to realize was that there was no taking Raven away from the club, so as far as he was concerned. He and Smokey were now best buddies. There was no other way around it.
He was never going to make Raven choose. Not between him or Smokey.
Larissa turned to him. “I believe Raven is in love with you. I think she misses you, but she doesn’t know how to tell you. She’s been hurt way too many times, and that makes it impossible for her to trust.”
Carlos nodded. Words failed him.
Raven had been willing to leave with him once, but this was different.
“I’ve got to head back to the library.”
“Thank you,” Smokey said.
“Thank you for listening to me.”
“I would advise you not come directly to the clubhouse,” Smokey said.
Larissa shook her head. “No, you’re right. I’ve seen quite enough.”
Smokey reached into his jacket pocket. “Call me if you need anything.”
She took his card, gave them both a final smile, and left.
“Well, she’s a nice little … woman,” Carlos said.
“Don’t piss me off. Larissa’s a sweet woman. Jonah’s a good man.”
“I can see that. After what we’ve just found out, don’t you think we have a right to be a little pissed?” Carlos asked.
“No. The only person I’m pissed at is myself. I should have known. Raven has always been complicated, but she always seems to keep it together.”
“Do you think she needs therapy?”
“I have no idea,” Smokey said. “I doubt she’d even go for it. This is Raven, after all.”
“True.”
They were silent for several seconds. Carlos didn’t know what Smokey was thinking, but his thoughts were directed toward Raven, on how he was going to be able to help her.
This was impossible. He only knew how to kill her demons, and they were all dead. Those sons of bitches deserved so much more.