The ache in my palms started to spread. Before I tore my hand away from her, like I’d intended to, it raked up her side until my thumb passed across the hard tip of her nipple. The action made her breath hitch. Her eyes fluttered closed, but she recovered quickly and returned her gaze to mine.
She was afraid of me, but at the same time, my touch turned her on. I could tell by the way her lips fell apart and how hard her nipples were, as I continued to pass my thumb across one.
Megan was giving it a good effort, but she couldn’t hide the flaming heat blazing in her gaze or the lust that hung heavily in her eyes.
Seeing her react this way to my touch heightened my arousal and reminded me that I hadn’t been with a woman in a lot of fucking months. The realization made my breathing kick up a few notches, and noticing how turned on Megan was didn’t help my dilemma.
I could no longer fight it. I was about to lose it. I was about to lose control of my actions. One second I was testing her to see if it was lust or fear she was hiding. The next second I’d lifted her onto the counter top and pulled her roughly into me, spreading her legs around me. She dropped her gaze and heaved deep breaths as her arms were forced to rest at my sides.
One of my hands gripped her ass, holding her against me while the other one roamed her body taking liberties I didn’t have permission to take. One of her hands started to rise. It sat shaking against my abs as if she were unsure of what to do with it.
Her other hand had a tight grip of my shirt on the opposite side. She was displaying the same behavior I’d seen that caused me to act this way in the first place. On one hand, she was terrified while on the other hand, she’d taken a hold of me.
I pressed my bearded cheek against hers, enjoying her soft warmth as it radiated into me. My lust-filled whispers kissed her ear.
“I want to fuck you, Megan. I want to fuck you so fucking bad that I can hardly stand it. Fuck, you’re killing me.”
My lust had turned me into a raging monster I’d lost control of. But, I had to regain control and calm myself because Megan obviously had no idea what she was doing to me. She was so afraid but so turned on at the same time. I needed to pull it together or I was going to lose it. Plus…rubbers.
I’d never had a woman in my house, so I was sure I didn’t have any fucking rubbers. The fact that Megan had made no attempt to fight me or push me away made me linger.
“Can I fuck you with no condom, Megan?”
This question got her attention, and for the first time, she eased her head away from mine before she scooted away from me. She’d released my shirt, and her trembling fingers were no long massaging my abs. Her gaze captured mine.
“I hope that you won’t, but there is not much I can do about it if you force it.”
The word force dialed down my intensity. She may as well have poured a bucket of ice over my head. I’d never had to force myself on any woman. Most, freely offered me their pussy.
“I don’t have anything,” I informed her; unsure of why I felt the need to tell her that.
Megan had me talking crazy and ready to do crazy shit. At twenty-seven, Megan had me ready to break a major rule I’d set for myself and had followed emphatically over the years. The last time I’d fucked with no condom on, I was a loose-dick eighteen-year-old boy who battled a constant pussy-drought as I searched desperately for a sliver of wetness in a sea of stingy teen girls.
“How do you know that I don’t have anything?” she asked, her voice low but serious.
“Megan, I believed you when you said you’d become a recluse. I’m willing to bet you haven’t had sex since your husband was killed. Your pussy is probably tighter than a virgin bride and wetter than a fucking dripping faucet.”
She dropped her head further, a tell-tale sign that I’d likely hit the nail on the head. I wasn’t going to fuck her without a condom, but I’d be damned if it wasn’t taking every ounce of my willpower to leave her alone. My dick was as hard as a steel support beam, but I managed to back away with a loud groan.
After placing Megan’s feet back on the floor, I turned away from her quickly. It had barely been forty-eight hours, and I’d almost done the one thing my father had ordered me not to do. I swiped at the beads of sweat that had gathered at my hairline and forced myself to get as far away from Megan’s tempting ass as I could get.
I didn’t need to store up any firewood or chop it. I’d used my fireplace twice in three years, but I was about to go and pick up an ax and start chopping down some fucking trees. I’d never reacted to a woman like that. I needed to expend some of this built-up energy. The way I was feeling, those fucking woods were about to catch hell.