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And then I remember that’s the same boy who organized a truce and took me to homecoming so his family could ambush my brother while we weren’t around.

He leans closer, bending to speak into my ear. “Watch your back.”

The next second, he’s disappearing down the hall, his threat still sending chills through me.

twenty-two

Devlin

Other girls might chase me, but they’d never catch me. For Preston, that might have been a thrill. That was his game. Give them just enough to have hope. Make them chase it, make them degrade themselves. See how far they’d debase themselves for a chance to be his plaything, his Darling Doll. Half the time, he never gave them what they wanted. That’s what really broke them.

They never caught me for another reason. I had no interest in being caught. I had no interest in being chased. I had no interest, period.

And then she came along. A girl who wouldn’t chase me. A girl who didn’t even hang around me, pretending she wasn’t waiting for a cue, a sign that I might be interested. That’s what they did with Preston. Even the girls who claimed not to want him, who played hard to get, they were just waiting for him to smile at them, to give them that seed of hope. And when he did, they were on him like ants on honey.

Crystal didn’t wait around giving me sidelong glances and hoping I’d look. She was smart. She avoided me. She stayed the hell away from me.

Even after what had happened between us, she didn’t get clingy or needy like Dolly had. She couldn’t be made to chase me. She respected herself too much for that. And that made me respect her. That made her the first girl who’d ever made me want to chase her.

twenty-three

Crystal

My heart hurts for people who go through life alone. The people who don’t have a whole army of family to hold them up. Who don’t have amazing friends to fall back on. Most of all, for the girl whose life I destroyed. Now I understand. I know how it feels to just be so. Fucking. Done.

“We’re going to find Royal and take down the Darlings once and for all,” Daddy says. He stands at a table set up in the living room, papers and maps strewn across it. “We all have a part to play. If you know your part because we already discussed it today, you can go ahead and get started.”

Uncle Benny and Uncle Donny take a map and sit down on the couch, their heads bent together as they discuss whatever they’re doing. King and Uncle Vinny join another group which includes a couple cousins, our grandfather, a great uncle, and a guy I call uncle even though he’s no blood relation. Our family is complicated.

To be honest, I’m not sure I want to know what they’re planning. I don’t care. If it gets Royal back, and he’s okay, it’s worth anything.

“The whole county’s looking,” Daddy continues. “The mayor had a press conference today. The police force is on board, thanks to Vinny leaning on them a little.” He raises a glass to the lawyer in the family, and a sober chorus of ‘hear, hear’ goes up before everyone turns back to their business.

“Your school is conducting their own investigation into anyone who might know anything. Remember, we want to get their focus on the Darlings and keep it there. Go talk to the administration at school. I’ll do the same. Don’t leave out anything about how much those boys were tormenting you.”

Something funny twists in my belly. It’s true that the Darlings have done nothing but attack and antagonize us since we arrived. But going after them like this feels somehow wrong.

I push the thought away. Anything that brings Royal home is right. If we have to step on a few toes to do it, that’s just the way things are. They’d do the same to us.

“Where’s Mom?” I ask, glancing around.

There’s a beat of silence before Nonna takes my hand and squeezes. “Your mother’s resting,” she says.

“You mean drunk?” I ask, pulling away.

No one answers.

“Well, it’s true,” I say. “I’m tired of pretending. You don’t have to shield and protect me. I’m not a kid. I know Mom’s a lush. And I want to help find Royal. So, here’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to make Devlin Darling fall in love with me, and he’s going to tell me everything he knows about Royal, the Midnight Swans, and the Darling patriarch. And then I’m going to leave him like he left me.”

The uncles shift and check Daddy’s reaction.

“Crystal, we’re not going to let him use you like that,” King says. “You know Royal wouldn’t want you to do that for him.”

“No,” Daddy says, holding up a hand to silence his oldest son. His eyes remain fixed on me, though. “I think that’s a good plan, Crystal. Keep us updated as it unfolds.”

I stand there, disbelieving. Most of me is relieved it went so well, happy that he so readily agreed, but a part of me is hurt, too. I really must be ruined in Daddy’s eyes for him to let me use my body that way.

“Really?” I ask.


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