I nodded my head and opened my eyes to look at her. "I think that I would be more disappointed with you if you took the job he was offering, to be honest. I would rather see you stay in the current job you’re in, no matter how easy it is to you, or have no job at all. You can always stay back home for a while and find something here, if you are truly unhappy. Don't sell yourself out because you feel you need to work away from home. Now what else is bothering you?"
"Nothing." Here I went again, lying. I wanted to scream out that I had feelings for the man staying across the hall from me. I wanted to tell her that I thought he was the one and that I was crushed that, after a wonderful night together, he wasn't speaking to me.
"Alexa, I know my children, dear. Don't lie to me."
I looked at Mom, knowing full well she knew there was more. The sound of the front door opening caused me to jump and look over my shoulder. Drew and Zach walked in carrying a couple of bags of groceries my Mom must have asked them to pick up. Zach came up the stairs first, Drew trailing behind. Mom was already occupied with Zach. Drew took one look at me and mouthed, "Are you all right?" I gave him a nod and turned my face away from him.
"What are you boys up to now?" she asked.
"Heading out to ski," Zach answered as he grabbed a glass of water. "Want to come, Lexi?"
"Lexi isn't feeling well. Has a headache. She is going to stay with me and bake."
"Oh, well, feel better there, sis."
"Dinner will be on about seven. Don’t be late," Mom called after them as she began putting the items away that they had purchased.
While Zach ran down to his room, I watched Drew grab his gloves from the closet, and then leave the room to get his ski pants. I couldn't help but watch after him. Mom finally cleared her throat, turning my attention back to her.
"What else is going on, Alexa? What else is bothering you?"
"Nothing, Mom. Let’s just get these cookies baked. I'll help, but I don't want to make them on my own," I said, turning my attention to her while thoughts of Drew ran through my mind.
Chapter 22
Alexa
I walkedwith my head down, concentrating on my feet kicking through the snow. Last night, I had called my new boss over in Europe and spoke with him about my upcoming assignments after Christmas. As he explained my assignments I felt as if I were brand new in the industry, and my heart became more unsettled than before. I was feeling so conflicted. I didn't know what I was going to do. Come January, I would more than likely be on a plane back to Europe. Drew had barely spoken to me all week, and every time I had suggested we do something, he would come up with some excuse as to why he couldn't. I didn't know what I had done wrong, but when I went to talk to him about it the other night after everyone was in bed, I had found his bedroom door locked again. I even softly knocked, but he didn't answer.
He had been right, that one night had changed everything between us, and the way he was acting was making me regret my decision to climb into that shower. There had never been a time in my life that I could remember Drew not being there for me.
I wandered into the ski shop and stood in line, patiently awaiting my turn at the counter. I listened to the conversations around me, the laughter, the two love birds behind me kissing and snuggling, and in an instant I felt utterly alone. I smiled to myself as he quietly told the woman he was with how much he loved her. The smile fell from my face as I wished that Drew was here with me and that it was my ear those words were being whispered to. I also secretly wished that if he had confessed how he felt, I would know exactly what to do about work in the new year.
Fifteen minutes later, with a new sense of sadness surrounding me, I left the ski shop. I had the annual boxing day skiing tickets in hand for Zach and Drew, and I stepped out the front door to continue my way to the next stop I needed to make. As soon as I stepped out the door, I saw Drew across the street. He walked with his head down, his hands shoved into his pockets, and he stopped in front of Gwen's Book Shop and entered.
Excitedly, I went to step forward and collided with a man carrying bags upon bags of gifts, the force of him knocking me to the ground, and I fell with a hard thump.
"Watch where you are going, young lady," the man sneered as he continued walking without even stopping to see if I was okay.
"Yeah, Merry Christmas to you too, Scrooge!" I shouted after him as people around me looked down at me as I sat on the sidewalk.
Getting up, I brushed myself off and walked across the street to the bookstore. I peeked through the window and saw Drew speaking with the salesgirl behind the counter. He laughed at whatever it was that she said, and then he wandered off to the back of the bookstore. I let out a breath and pulled on the door, the jingling bell alerting my arrival. I smiled to the girl behind the counter and went off in the same direction as Drew.
I watched from a distance as Drew slipped into the History section. I quickly made my way up to where he was and slipped down the aisle in front of him. He had his back to me so I peeked through the shelves. I watched as he picked up book after book, reading the backs of them. I was enjoying the view of his ass in his snug jeans when he suddenly turned around.
I dropped to the floor, praying that he hadn't seen me, but it was too late. I heard him start to laugh on the other side of the shelf, and the next thing I knew, his feet were in front of me.
"Lexi? What are you doing?"
"Ah, there it is. I finally I found it," I said, grabbing a book from the bottom of the shelf without reading the title and standing up. "Thank goodness they have it and the girl was right, exactly where she said it would be!" I exclaimed. "I was afraid I would have to order it online and risk it not being here Christmas morning." I smiled.
I could feel his stare and peeked up at him, a soft smile resting on his lips. I could feel my cheeks start to burn as we stood across from one another. "Are you following me?" he asked, reaching and taking the book from my hand. He read the title and looked back up at me.
"No, no, I came in to get my mother this book for Christmas," I stated matter of fact.
"Is that so?" he asked, crossing his right foot over the left and leaning up against the bookshelf.
"Yes." I nodded. "You see she has been going on and on about that book. Even made the comment to me the other day while we were out shopping how badly she wanted it."