“You organized a great party, Leah.”
“Yeah, well, I figured they deserved it. I’m happy they are happy.” She watched them longingly as they danced together. My mother’s head still resting on Joe’s shoulder. “It was the least I could do for them. They’ve both done so much for me, your mother has been so supportive of all my dreams,” she said wiping a tear from her cheek as she smiled and continued watching them.
Joe held my mother close whispering something in her ear and then kissing her gently. I couldn’t help but glance over at Leah, the look on her face said everything she failed to say verbally—she was lost in her thoughts watching them, a soft smile on her lips. But the longer she watched the more her smile disappeared, and tears built in her eyes. She blinked hard and swallowed and I knew what she was thinking—she wanted what they had—but there was no way I was the man to give it to her.
“Leah, I’m sorry about what I said yesterday.”
She cleared her throat, wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand and went back to cleaning up the plates on the table. “It’s fine, Logan.”
Who did she think she was fooling, her eyes lacked that glow she always had around me. I reached out and placed my hand on her shoulder. “It’s not fine, please talk to me.”
“I have nothing to say to you. You’ve made it crystal clear what this is, or I should say was. I can’t do this right now.” She shrugged out of my touch and walked across the kitchen to get away from me. I glanced over my shoulder at our parents who still danced in their own little world.
I walked over to where she stood, she wasn’t about to get away from me that easy. I walked up behind her, placing both my hands on her waist. “Meet me tonight, at the hotel,” I whispered in her ear. “Please. Let me fix this.”
“Why so you can fuck me all over again and watch as I run away from you in tears? Do you even know how to fix this?”
“No, but I will try.”
“I don’t know.”
“Please, Leah, don’t make me beg. Just meet me.”
She still didn’t answer me and continued with what she was doing as if I hadn’t said a word. “Leah, for fuck’s sake, talk to me.”
“I’ll think about it, Logan. That’s it.” She wasn’t playing, she was serious. I would have to wait and see if she showed up. She moved around the kitchen, cleaning, avoiding me completely even when I tried to help her. I didn’t want to fight with her anymore, so I walked into the living room to say goodnight to my mother and Joe. They walked me to the front door.
“You are coming to brunch tomorrow, right?” my mother asked smiling.
I turned around and looked past them into the kitchen, Leah stood there leaning up against the door frame watching the three of us.
“Yes, I will be there,” I said looking Leah directly in the eyes. I was hoping she could read what I was saying to her.
“Great, we will be there at eleven, don’t be late.” My mother leaned in and kissed my cheek. I hugged her goodnight and when I looked up, Leah had already left the doorway and a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach told me she would not show up tonight. I walked out the door praying that my gut was wrong, and she would once again be laying in my arms.
SIXTEEN
Leah
I allowed myself to watch him as he walked out the front door. I had wanted him for so many years it was almost too much for me to take. When I heard those words come from his mouth after spending the night in his arms, I finally realized exactly where he stood. He wanted me too, just not in the same way I had wanted him.
This was all too much for me to process, it wasn’t every day you had sex with the stepbrother you had fallen in love with. Obviously, I couldn’t share this with my father or Anna, which made the whole situation worse. I even debated if I could share this with Jenna. But I had no choice, I didn’t have a therapist which is technically what I really needed, and I had no one else I felt close enough to, so, Jenna was the lucky winner.
As I was putting more things away, I grabbed my phone and sent a message to her. She had moved and was now working in a different state. The time zones were different too, so timing may be tricky. I was hoping she would be finished work by now. Just as I hit send, both Dad and Anna walked into the kitchen. “Leah, honey, are you sure you don’t want any help finishing up tonight?”
“No, Anna, I’m good. Please, go relax with Dad.”
Anna gazed at me, a funny look coming over her face as she took two steps toward me. “Leah, are you sure you’re all right, you’re flushed, and you look upset. Joe, doesn’t she?”
“Yes, she does, are you coming down with something?” Dad asked while Anna placed her hand on my forehead to check for fever.
I smiled. “I’m just tired, so I will finish up here, then make a nice cup of spearmint tea and go relax with a good book. After all, you’re always telling me how I need to do more of that.”
My father let out a yawn and turned toward the living room. “I’m heading to bed,” he said stretching and heading toward the stairway.
“Night, Dad.”
Anna squinted her eyes at me, trying to figure out if I was okay or not. “If something is bothering you, you know you can talk to me,” she said pushing away a couple strands of hair that had fallen into my face.