Chapter Thirty-Six
Tamsyn
“Hey, Maddie,” she croaked, and then winced.
A couple days after the attack, it was getting easier to talk, but it didn’t feel normal at all. Like her words were surrounded by bruised and swollen flesh, which she supposed they were. But she’d press on. She was so happy to finally be able to be on the phone with Maddie.
“It’s so good to hear your voice, I’ve been so worried. Hux and Lowell have been keeping us updated but it’s not the same. They agreed with Daddy that we can come visit when you’re out of the hospital. I can’t wait. But you sound terrible. Does it hurt?”
“Yeah.”
“Then you don’t have to say much. I can just talk at you if you want. You know I can go on forever and ever.”
She could hear the anxiety in the forced chipperness of her bestie’s voice. God love Maddie for trying so damn hard.
“That sounds good, but…” Tamsyn swallowed, trying to clear what felt like an extra lump in her throat. Wasn’t it bad enough to deal with her injuries never mind all these feelings? “I had something I wanted to talk to you about.”
“You can just tell me when I get there if you want,” Maddie offered, because she was a good friend.
“I think we should talk about it before that.”
“Unless you’re going to tell me you’re BFF breaking up with me, I can’t imagine there’s anything that important. Oh no, you’re not breaking up with me, are you?”
“Never,” Tamsyn said firmly. “Never ever. You’re stuck with me, bestie.”
Maddie made an exaggerated “phew” sound and a laugh squeezed Tamsyn’s throat. Fuck that hurt, but she wouldn’t trade joking with her BFF for anything. Then she blew a long breath through her nose and closed her eyes, fixing her resolve. Why was this so hard?
“I feel like I’ve been keeping a secret from you, and I don’t like it. We tell each other everything.”
“Probably more than we should,” Maddie agreed.
“Nah. No such thing as TMI between besties.”
Maddie giggled and Tamsyn smiled. She’d shared some very, um, detailed accounts about some of her time with Daddy and Lolo with her best friend. Very detailed indeed. If they’d survived all of that, this was going to be fine, there was nothing to worry about.
“You know Hux and Lo are my daddies.”
Well, Hux definitely still was and the jury was out on Lo, but maybe if she acted like he was here to stay it would just…happen. Sure, that would work.
“Yes. Your very handsome daddies who are obsessed with you.”
It was her turn to giggle. Which hurt less than outright laughing but still wasn’t awesome.
“But the way that they’re my daddies… I’m not a middle with them. I…I’m a little.”
There was a brief pause, and her stomach sunk. What if this was a bigger deal than she’d even worried about? What if Maddie was angry that she’d kept this from her? What if—
“Okay,” her friend said slowly. “Are you going to be a little all the time, then?”
“No, I don’t think so. Not at work, for sure, and I’m not quitting. With them, yes, and with some of the friends I’ve made at Hive. But I like how you and I are friends, I don’t want that to change. I still want to be more middle-y with you. Is-is that okay?”
There was another pause and there was that icky twisty feeling in her tummy again. She was going to need some cuddles when this was over.
“I guess that depends.”
Oh no.
“Depends on what?”