Chapter 24 - Jade: Home
I woke up to fingers moving up and down my back, the sun shining in my face. I felt a strong arm around me and the events of last night replayed in my mind.
So much had happened in the last 24 hours; it was hard to keep track of it all. My body felt tired and spent, but also satisfied.
“You’re awake,” Grayson said, causing his chest to vibrate a little.
My eyes fluttered open, and I saw the sun rising in the east. The day had only just begun, but it also started the countdown to my return to New York City.
“Good morning.” He kissed the top of my head. “How did you sleep?”
“Like a baby, and you?”
“Haven’t slept that good in what feels like years.”
I couldn’t help the warm and fuzzy feeling that took over my chest. I believed I had something to do with his sleep, but I wouldn’t ask him.
A comfortable silence fell over us as we stared out my window at the sunrise. My mind was plagued with so many questions and what-ifs.I had been so sure of my decision to leave for home but now my brain was completely scrambled. I knew I was needed back at the firm, but there was so much in Riverroad that needed my attention. One of those things being my brother. But the only problem was that Riverroad wasn’t home for me.
I had a home, and it was New York City. Tash was there, Riley was there, and all my friends were there. But Ethan wasn’t there, and neither was Grayson.
So much had shifted in our relationship overnight, it was crazy. We didn’t have sex last night. We made love; a love that was so deep and so pure. I saw it in his eyes. He was telling me he loved me through every kiss and touch and every stroke.
He didn’t need to say the words for me to know it, but I still wanted to hear them. I knew I was still hopelessly and madly in love with Grayson. I didn’t think I ever stopped being in love with him.
“What’s on your mind?” He cupped the side of my face.
“I leave today.” The words filled the room loudly. It was the one reality I didn’t want to face today.
“What time is your flight?”
“What’s the time now?”
“6:02.”
“I board at one, so that means I need to start getting ready.”
Tell me to stay, Grayson, I mentally screamed. If he told me he wanted me to stay, then I would stay. If he told me he loved me, I would stay. I wanted him to want me here. All he had to do was ask. But sadly, he never did.
“So, I guess I will leave you to it.” He removed his arms from around me and started to get up. “I just need to go and help my mom with something. I will come to see you off before you leave.”
Unable to speak, I just nodded and watched him get dressed. Maybe it was just me, and I had only imagined what I saw or maybe he was suppressing it all because he knew as well as I did that maybe the stars for us were just not aligning.
We were like two star-crossed lovers that never got our happily ever after in the end. How I wished I could rewrite our stars so our story would be different.
Grayson put his trousers on and came around the bed and kissed me on the cheek for a second longer than would be normal. When he pulled away, I could see those same emotions swimming behind his eyes.
I thought, when he opened his mouth, he would tell me exactly what I wanted and needed to hear.
“Bye, Jade,” he whispered, and he got up and left.
I stared at the empty door, hoping he would come back in and profess his undying love for me and tell me to stay. When I realized he wasn’t coming back, I pulled the sheets off my bed and started getting ready.
After a long shower and another much-needed cry, I was ready to head to the airport. I had checked my phone periodically, hoping there was a text from Grayson, but there was nothing.
I stared at myself in the mirror. “He’s not coming, Jade. But that’s okay. You got your goodbye and your closure.”
I tried to soothe myself, but it was pointless. That heavy feeling in my chest returned.