4
Kennedy took some solace in the fact that it hadn’t required any seduction on her part to land her in Knox’s bed. Well, okay, in his arms. Because at the rate they were going they might not even make it to the frumpy quilt-covered mattress bracketed by an outdated brass-bar head and footboard over in the corner of the cabin.
Knox’s urgency was tinged with desperation. It salved the part of her that had never recovered from him so easily walking away from what they’d had. It also let her conscience off the hook, because she felt like she hadn’t coerced him into doing something he wasn’t interested in. That was doubly important when she was about to betray him as he’d done to her so many years ago.
“Stop thinking so much.” Knox rasped before nipping her neck, right below her ear. “For once in your life, just feel. Live in the moment.”
Damn, the reverberations of his primal touch shot through her body, straight to her toes, which curled in her boots. As much as she kept trying to convince herself she was sacrificing her better sense for the Shields, she couldn’t help but melt a little inside as she stared straight into Knox’s emerald eyes. His face, his body, his soul—every bit of that had changed, hardened. But his eyes were so familiar they threatened to break her.
Kennedy reached for Knox, tunneling her hands into the sides of his reddish hair, remembering how silky smooth it felt running between her fingers. It was shorter these days, neater, but still as soft. The only part of him she could say that about.
His arms were like steel as they bracketed her, his forearms planted from elbow to wrist on either side of her shoulders before he leaned on one and put the other to good use. He caressed the entire length of her arm, which was bared in the candy-pink tank top she wore, before briefly squeezing her hand.
And as he did, his lips brushed hers. Both of them gasped before he bounced back, this time sealing their mouths completely. Instinct took over from logic as she surrendered, allowing him access to her entire being when she should have been guarding herself from the influence he obviously still held over her body and, likely, her emotions.
There would be plenty of time to kick herself for this later. So she might as well make it count while she could. Kennedy slid her hands lower so they cupped his neck and used the grip to keep him close and devour him even as he did the same to her.
Knox leaned in, his thigh nudging her pussy, making her rub up against him in a sinuous motion she didn’t know she was capable of until her body craved more.
With each kiss he erased a year of the time they’d spent apart. They might be strangers now, but her body recognized his and remembered their teenaged make out sessions. This time she didn’t intend to stop without having all of him. Kisses and heavy petting weren’t going to be enough to put out the fire he lit inside her as if she’d been kindling drying out without him.
“You smell so good. Clean.” He inhaled, his nose buried in her hair as he caught his breath. His parted lips brushed the skin of her neck as he murmured to her, “I’ve never forgotten that.”
Knox had grown up in shitty circumstances. His mom had been a kid herself when she’d had him. Passed around to relatives who had too many of their own mouths to feed to keep him off the streets for long, Knox had fallen through the cracks. He’d always been obsessed with basics she took for granted, like the concept of leftovers or freshly shampooed hair, and it seemed that hadn’t changed. So why hadn’t he taken the chance he’d had to alter the path his life was on? Why had he thrown it all away—her love included—and gone right back to the gutter he’d nearly clawed his way out of?
She knew the answer, but as someone who’d never experienced addiction, it was still sometimes impossible for her to wrap her head around it.
Then again, she’d never had sex with a man before either and here she was, completely sure of how to react to the things he was doing to her body despite her lack of previous real-life exposure to those stimuli.
Kennedy put her extensive knowledge of anatomy to good use. She shoved her hand under the faded T-shirt that hugged his ripped torso and ran her thumbs along the ridge formed by the tendon that stretched from his iliac crest toward his groin, fashioning a delicious V pointing straight to his cock. Then she worked upward, bunching the thin cotton of his shirt in her hands as the backs of her knuckles skimmed his washboard abs. Damn. He might have been underweight but his lack of body fat put all of him on display.
It didn’t take long before she whipped the fabric from him, his hands halting their roaming only long enough for her to rid him of the shirt. He didn’t even bother to kick off his boots before unbuttoning and unzipping his pants.
She breathed a sigh of relief. Hopefully he wouldn’t bother taking the time to fully undress her, because being naked with him would have made her feel too vulnerable. Even if she was a physician and had seen more bodies than she could count, exposing herself to someone else—him especially—wasn’t something she was good at…or had much practice with.
In that moment, she imagined what it would be like if she’d given in to the equally as strong attraction between her and Marcus any of the times they’d had the opportunity to be intimate. She couldn’t imagine him ever settling for something this perfunctory. No, Marcus would be the kind of man to savor every stitch he removed from her and delight her with hours of foreplay before he ever gave in to his own desires. He was a legend, a man built from patience.
She shuddered, wondering what it would be like to have the best of both worlds—Knox’s passion and Marcus’s thoroughness. Hey, why not? Lots of her friends had committed poly relationships.
Besides, thinking of Marcus now, knowing he was practically there right on the other side of the comms and somewhere outside in the scrub, made her so much more secure and confident as she took this wild leap. She hoped all the porn she’d watched and nights spent with her arsenal of toys, pleasuring herself, would be enough to make her attempts at fucking Knox less laughable. Hell, he’d already had more experience at fifteen than she had now closing in on thirty.
She figured she wasn’t going to have to worry about much except letting him take the lead when he leveled her with the most intense stare she’d ever seen and shoved his hands under her skirt. His fingers wrapped around the lace of her panties. “You don’t care if I destroy these, do you?”
She gulped and shook her head no.
He ripped her panties from her and had her hoisted over his shoulder before she could fully register his intent. His broad palm on her ass kept her securely in place as he marched the three short steps to the bed.
He tossed her onto it, the metal frame creaking ominously as she bounced, then followed her. Except this time he didn’t stop at kissing her. Sure, that’s where he started, his tongue swiping along hers before he yanked her tank top down so that her breasts, small enough not to require a bra, were exposed, smooshed up and together by the cotton of her shirt.
He took a second or two to fondle and suck on them before slithering between her legs. His head disappeared beneath her skirt and then she nearly forgot to think, forgot why she was there, and that this wasn’t just another lascivious dream of hers that he was starring in. No, that was his tongue, exploring every fold of her labia before doing something none of her toys had ever come close to simulating on her flesh.
She moaned and writhed beneath him, trying to press herself tighter to his face when that would have been impossible. Around the time he pressed two fingers deep inside her, Kennedy knew it wouldn’t take much more for her to shatter. She tried to stifle her wild cries, fully aware the entire team—and one man in particular—could hear every catch of her breath, whimper, and moan.
But it was no use. Knox was as good at pleasuring her as she’d always imagined he would be.
“So sweet,” he growled against her. “Going to be heaven on my cock.”
Kennedy blinked back to reality. Right. This wasn’t about her. Shit. “Then fuck me.”