4
Van scrubbed his hands down his jeans over and over, though his palms remained sweaty as fuck.He’d faced armed enemies intent on blowing his brains out during his stint in the Marines and had never once been as afraid of confronting someone as he was about talking to Kyra.
Mostly because she’d been right to rip him a new one in front of every last one of their friends and coworkers.He’d fucked up.Several times.First by allowing his interest in her to peek out, then by giving in to temptation and kissing her that one fateful day, and afterward by pretending it hadn’t meant anything to him in order to maintain the professionalism required of their positions.
Only when he’d seen her making out with Ollie had he realized how badly he’d handled the situation.Because in that moment, it had been painfully obvious that his infatuation with Kyra went beyond bus-buddies or even fascination.
He might be obsessed.
Every night, lying within arm’s reach without the right to extend his hand and touch her had obviously driven him mad.
The rest of the band had left to celebrate Kason’s new single hitting number one on the charts.When Van had realized Kyra was missing from the group and that Jordan was there to keep an eye on Kason’s security in his place, he’d begged off, praying for a minute to talk to Kyra in private—a rare commodity in their situation.
He hoped she was on the bus and not out somewhere on her own.Both because he needed to clear the air and because he hated the idea of her wandering around unprotected.Whether she realized it or not, she was famous.More so every day and, therefore, exposed.
Sunglasses, a hat, and dark baggy clothes weren’t going to be enough to obscure her identity in public for much longer.She rebelled against the loss of her freedom and despised taking bodyguards from his team with her.But that was the price she had to pay for their success.
Someday, when he wasn’t already on precarious footing with her, he’d talk to her about that and make sure she quit dodging them, even if it was only from time to time.
Today, he had much more important, and more difficult, things to say.
Van tapped his code into the bus’s keypad and entered.A sweep of the living areas left him disappointed.No Kyra.
Damn!
He headed toward the rear of the bus, wondering if she was taking advantage of the solitude to indulge in a bubble bath in Kason’s bathroom, which she sometimes did, calling it her spa day.
Except the door was wide open, and no one was in there.
Shit!
He’d resigned himself to hanging out and waiting for her to return.As he entered the corridor between the six berths where he, Kyra, and the rest of the band slept, he realized a shadow crossed the curtain of hers.And it wasn’t his own.
She was sleeping?Kyra despised naps.She thought they were a waste of time she could be doing any of the other things she enjoyed.And no one spent more time in their bunk than they really had to, at least not when they had the whole bus to themselves.Though they were fine for sleeping, there wasn’t a lot of room in them for much anything else.He must have hurt her even more than he’d realized if she was in here, hiding from her problems.
Van drew a deep breath.He took a moment to compose the opening lines of his forgive-me speech as he shuffled from foot to foot.Then he tugged one corner of the curtain back as he quietly asked, “Hey, can we talk?”
Kyra gasped and froze, her eyes wide.She had headphones in, her laptop open, and her hand in her yoga pants.His bug-eyed stare winged from where she was obviously taking care of herself to the porn playing on her screen.
Fuck!
Van snapped the curtain closed again.He stood there, breathing hard, unsure of whether to run away or to dive back inside.
How could he possibly have managed to make thingsworse?
Van thought about Kason.What would he do if this was Wren or Jordan?How would he show them that he cared?He’d risked his entire career for the people he loved.Maybe Van needed to do the same to prove to Kyra that she was important to him.
“You’re just going to stand there?”Kyra shrieked from inside.
“What else am I supposed to do?”he asked.
Kyra yanked the curtain apart then.Her laptop was closed and tucked into the pocket on the wall along with her headphones.She rolled onto her side and leveled a glare at him.“Anything but stand there and judge me.If I don’t do something to relieve the pressure, I’m going to explode.Now get the fuck out of here so I can finish the job you obviously don’t want to do.”
“Don’t tell me what I want,” he snarled, his rational approach out the window.It was impossible to think when she was here, horny, and questioning his desire for her.She had no idea how deeply he longed for her.Mostly because he’d been very careful not to let it show.“You might be able to get away with shit like that with Ollie, but not me.I’m not nearly as nice as he is.”
Kyra sat up so fast she nearly decapitated herself in the limited space of her berth.She jabbed her finger toward the door.“Get out.”
“No.”He leaned forward instead, bracing his hands on her bunk so their faces were inches apart and she had to look directly into his eyes.“I can’t lose you.Whether letting go would be the right thing or not, I just can’t.You’re my best friend.”