The thought made my gut twist and locked mymouth.
Damon came up beside me, his eyes narrowed. “Why are you still here if something back there matters so much more to you?” he said, his voicesharp.
My brother’s head jerked around. “We all helped Rose before any of us even knew about consorts,” Kyler said. “There’s no reason we all have to take that step to keep helping. If Seth’s notready—”
“It’s all right. It’s a fair question,” I broke in. Damon’s comment hadn’t even rankled me. I met his shadowed eyes. “Nothing matters to me more thanthis.”
His lip curled partway into a sneer. “Then what’s stoppingyou?”
The fact that nothing mattered to me more than this. But I didn’t think saying that would clarify things for him. Damon was the last person who’d understand holding back when your instincts were propelling you forward. How often did he think more than a few days into thefuture?
Ky’s attention had shifted back to Rose. Longing was written all over his face. Was that how I looked when I watched hertoo?
Jin was beaming as he tramped along, as if he’d left every hesitation and concern he’d had behind when he’d accepted her proposition. Wereanyof them reallythinking?
It wasn’t just me ready to throw my whole life in with her, was it? Maybe all of us were more invested than was really wise. It could be that what Rose needed right now wasn’t wisdom but exactly this incredible devotion, this passion. To hold her up. To kindle her spark. To help her overcome everything ahead ofher.
And if later on that dedication became too much… Would it make any difference if I wasn’t adding to her burden? Whatever Ky said, after this was done, it’d be the other three guys she turned to, not me. I’d be left on the sidelines if I wasn’t a part of this all the waythrough.
A memory rose up in the back of my mind of the night when Rose had come to me, flustered and shy but just as determined as she was now. Wanting my touch and the security I could give her withit.
I know if I get too caught up, you’ll be looking out for me at least as much as I should be. Probablymore.
I was supposed to be the strong one, so why was I so fucking afraid? Not even afraid of her, but of me, of how well I could stay in control. As if I hadn’t always been the one of us best at keeping my head and heart incheck.
What could I really do about her stepmother and that asshole she’d been supposed to marry if I hung back now? What could I do to keep her steady through whatever cameafterward?
Resolve filled me as I picked up my pace to catch up with Rose. I could give her all that, all my attention and love and all the power she could take from me, and be strong enough not to lean on her too much, couldn’t I? If even I couldn’t… we were all careening toward disasteranyway.
Rose’s pace had slowed. The branches leaned more densely together up ahead. I walked faster to push one aside before she reached it. Like the old days, clearing a path for her. Making her way easier however Icould.
Rose glanced up at me and smiled, so brightly it lit my heart. “Thankyou.”
Yeah. That feltright.
My hand dropped to take hers as we walked on. Damon muttered something behind me, but I ignored him. I could weather his attitude. I could weather just about anything when I hadRose.
I eased another branch aside, and we emerged into a clearer patch of woods. In front of us, amid a stand of trees draped with vine, I caught a glimpse of stone blocks. The rim of atower.
My breath caught. Oh. We’d only come out this far once when we were kids, but the feel of the place had stayed etched in my memory. The stillness and the aura of some kind of significance. Almost likemagic.
Not almost. We could acknowledge it now. This placewasmagic. Why else would Rose have brought ushere?
“All right,” she said with a hitch in her voice. “Here we are. Let’s see if we can do this. I think the three ofyou—”
“Four,” I said. “You’ve got metoo.”
Her lips parted. “Seth…”
I touched her cheek and bent to kiss her. A pleased murmur escaped her. She tilted her head to kiss me back more deeply, looping her arm around my neck. When we eased apart a few inches, every nerve in my body was quivering—with a little apprehension, sure, but mostly withhappiness.
Yes. That was exactly where I was meant tobe.
“I’m sure,” I said. “I promise you, I’ve never been so sure of anything in mylife.”
Chapter Thirty
Rose