I had no idea what the future held for me, but the idea of having Max by my side was sounding more and more like a good thing. I wasn’t exactly sure how that would all legally work out when it came to taking her to doctor’s appointments and that kind of thing, but that was a bridge we could cross when we got there.
“Thank you,” Max said. “Nobody ever cares what I think, but you do.”
“Oh,” I said, feeling tears of my own welling up in my eyes. I knew how she felt. I’d gone through so much of my life just doing what everybody thought was best for me. I’d learned to shut down my own desires to make sure I was pleasing the people who tried to steer my life. From what I knew of Max, I guessed she felt more like nobody even bothered to try to force her to be a certain way. But at the end of the day we both needed to feel like someone cared what we wanted, even if it was in different ways. I hugged her tighter. “You can always tell me how you’re feeling, okay? Don’t ever forget that.”
“You can tell me, too,” Max said. “Like you haven’t talked about what Uncle Stones did. Do you need to vent or anything?”
“Badly,” I admitted. “Maybe we can use some of this ridiculous pile of cash to buy candy, rent a girly movie, and veg out tonight? I could invite Kate over or we could do it just us.”
“You can invite her. She’s cool.”
I smiled. “Alright. It’s a date. And don’t think you’re going to get through this without telling me everything about this boy of yours.”
43
CHRISTIAN
When I looked back on the past few weeks, it felt like a tornado had ripped through my world. There’d been a brief period of turmoil, chaos, and change. All my carefully laid plans had been tossed to the wind and now it was over as suddenly as it had begun. I sat in my office with the feeling that the storm was gone and the silence I used to crave now felt oppressive.
In a few days, Adrian Bellamo would come to Stone Tower and I would execute the plan I’d worked out with the F.B.I. Perry had been my only real contact with them, and the last time we’d talked he had told me not to reach out or make any sign that I was working with them. I had to pretend I was on my own. I also had to pretend I didn’t know Luco Bellamo had listening devices inside my fucking office, along with people who worked for him crawling through my building to keep tabs on me.
I couldn’t help kicking myself for not simply telling Lola the full truth about what we were up against before everything went to shit. I’d told her people wanted to ruin me, but I hadn’t made it clear how dangerous those people were. If I had…
I sighed, pushing a stack of papers away as I stood and folded my arms. If this shit with Adrian and his father hadn’t happened, I wondered where I’d be. The company was doing well. All our measurables were up and it was getting harder and harder to claim the expansion to Fairhope was a mistake. We were bringing in new clients from locations that had frankly seemed out of reach from our offices in Manhattan. There were people on the ground shaking hands and doing all the things that helped establish trust.
Stone Financial was booming. Lola and I had been clicking on all cylinders. Even if some part of me had known it was doomed to fail between us, I still believed we would’ve had more time. Hell, maybe I could’ve even learned to change just enough for her to make things last. I thought about movie night with Max and how good it had felt to be part of something resembling a family, even if it was just a moment. I thought about having my hands on Lola and knowing she was all mine for the night–about waking up next to her and enjoying the act of going to get her breakfast. She had seemed so excited and appreciative to have a hot breakfast before she’d even showered and gotten ready.
I hadn’t even been having trouble sleeping since I met her. The insomnia that had been following me for years seemed to suddenly and inexplicably dry up. Some of my famously foul moods had gone away once I was sleeping better.
Now it was just over twenty-four hours since I’d broken things off with her and I could already tell the sleepless nights were back. I laid in bed last night and did nothing but toss and turn, haunted by the ghost of not just Lola, but Max.