Ann chuckled. “I think our respective partners might have some insight into each of us the other might find useful.”
“Oh…I hadn’t thought of it like that. But we could have that conversation here.”
“Neutral ground,” Ann replied. “I was reminded recently of how useful neutral ground is.”
“I guess,” Heidi agreed. Still, she felt there was some ulterior motive Ann wasn’t sharing in terms of this plan. But she reminded herself that she wanted to trust and to trust fully. Drawing in a deep breath, Heidi took a risk she never would have before. “I’ll talk to her, but I’m on board, so long as we lay out some ground rules first.”
“Like what?” Ann twisted to face Heidi.
“First, I don’t sleep alone.”
“I think we can manage that.” Ann kissed her lightly.
“Second, this is not to break anyone up or cause any arguments. It is solely a fact-finding trip, a learning trip.”
“Agreed.” Ann’s voice rose, and Heidi could tell she was getting excited about this prospect.
She had to come up with more rules. The overwhelming desire to protect herself and all of them through this entire process consumed her. “Third, no one leaves once we get there until it’s time to go. We don’t leave on a bad note.”
“Yes. Let’s do this.”
Heidi paused. Was this something she really wanted? Did she need to know what Ann’s partner knew about her? It would be a wonderful insight, no doubt, and perhaps it would fill in some missing blanks she’d been wondering about. Since they struggled so much to communicate with each other, maybe their girlfriends could help them figure that out. On the other hand, her relationship with Lila was so new, she didn’t want to set that off on the wrong foot.
“Let’s see how it plays out for now before we make any plans.”
“For sure,” Ann replied.
Without warning, Ann moved and hovered over Heidi. It surprised her, and she drew in a sharp breath, gripping the sheets under her to center herself before she remembered this was Ann, someone who was safe.
“I love you,” Ann whispered.
“I love you, too,” Heidi responded with a kiss.
“I’m glad you had a good night out. I know how much you needed it.”
“Thanks.” And Heidi genuinely meant it. “I think I learned a lot tonight when I didn’t expect to.”
“Even better. You’ll have to tell me all about it.”
“Mmhmm.” Heidi moved in, kissing Ann more deeply. There still seemed to be a barrier between them, one she had hoped was gone by then with all the changes she had made and all the work they had done recently. She couldn’t even put her finger on what it was that seemed to come between them, but it was still there. Cursing it, Heidi wrapped her hand around the back of Ann’s neck and dragged her in deeper for a kiss. She wouldn’t push her luck on what they did that night, not after her evening with Lila, and she was going to have to think more deeply about Ann’s suggestion of a weekend getaway, but for now she was content to have Ann next to her under the covers.
CHAPTER15
Lila rolledout her yoga mat before she turned the television on and selected her streaming service. She needed to concentrate and center herself before Ann came over. Dating two people with consistency was more chaotic than she’d anticipated especially because both of them currently seemed to have intense needs.
It was good, though. She enjoyed both Ann and Heidi, but moving into a committed relationship with the both of them at the same time was a larger adjustment than she’d anticipated. Still, her last night with Heidi made her smile. Heidi was so sweet, and in a way, so innocent. She hadn’t experienced pleasure when there was full trust yet, and Lila could see why. Even in the short time they’d known each other, she’d seen Heidi break down walls each and every time they were together. She was slowly coming out of her shell.
The video played on the television, and Lila shook out her arms and legs as she prepared to stretch her body and center her mind. She tried to do yoga at least three days a week when she had the time, but it had been difficult lately to get a good session in. This was exactly what she needed before Ann arrived for their weekly dinner date—well, it was weekly until the fiasco of attempting to go toIndigohad knocked them off their pattern.
She was still somewhat curious about what had pulled Ann away so rapidly and if that entire situation had resolved, but she also didn’t want to pry. Ann was always so closed off about sharing anything to do with her partner, to the point Lila still didn’t even know the woman’s name. Ann always played it off as her partner being a severely private person. Lila had gone along with it, trusting that Ann wasn’t lying.
With the way Ann had opened up recently, she was pretty sure the truth lay closer to Ann and her partner having some deep underlying issues they were still working through. Which, in Lila’s estimation, sounded like a pretty typical relationship. She loved her stepfather dearly, but she knew he and her mother didn’t have a perfect relationship and still argued. They’d been married ten years at that point and there were still problems that arose.
Moving into a downward dog before shifting into a warrior pose, Lila drew deep breaths in and out. Her mind spun with thoughts of Ann and then thoughts of Heidi. She had to stop it if this session of yoga was truly going to work. Re-centering herself, Lila listened to the directions from the instructor as she shifted into a tree pose.
Her muscles tightened and relaxed on command. She cleared her mind of the stresses in her life. She listened to the steady rhythm of her heart and pushed everything else from her mind. This was her time, and she was going to use it to prepare herself for the next few days when she couldn’t do this.
Lila spent the next hour doing yoga, a light sheen of sweat on her skin when the video finally ended. She shook out her muscles and then cleaned up from her session, feeling far more at ease than she had been before. Yes, a good hour of yoga had been exactly what she needed. She hopped in the shower to clean herself up before Ann was due to arrive.