Actually, I can think of a couple hundred other things I would rather do.
Frustrated about my lack of movement, he growls, “Jesus, Harlow, it was a joke. I know your memories are gone, but I didn’t think your sense of humor was too.”
“Didn’t sound like a joke,” I sneer.
He rolls his eyes and pulls out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket, “Whatever, your sense of humor obviously sucks, by the way.”
“Maybe you just aren’t good at telling jokes,” I tilt my head to the side, watching as he lights up the end of his cigarette, a bright cherry appearing at the end. Sucking in a deep breath of nicotine, he holds the air inside his lungs for a moment before releasing it, a pillar of smoke snaking out of his nose and into the chilly night air.
“Did you miss me?” he asks, his eyes piercing mine before I break the connection and look away.
“No, I wasn’t lying when I said I didn’t remember you.”
“I can help you remember me…” his voice trails off, “I mean if you want me to.” I know I should be shoving my foot up this guy’s ass by now, but my curiosity outweighs my need to hurt him.
“Did we ever… you know?” My cheeks start to flame as the question rolls off my tongue.
“Fuck?” Matt hisses into the air, “No, you never let me inside those cotton panties of yours.” He takes another drag of his cigarette, exhaling the smoke, before rubbing the end against the bottom of his shoe. His insult doesn’t go unnoticed. It’s clear to me that I was a good girl before all of this happened, or at least somewhat of one if I held onto my v-card.
“Why the hell are we engaged then?”
Matt smiles again, and I swear the brown in his eyes grows darker, “’Cause it makes sense. It will be good for both of our families and good for business. So, let’s just get it over with. You did agree to marry me at one point, that’s the truth, and I think we still should, we don’t have to be in love for this to work. We don’t have to hate each other either. This could be a mutual benefit for both of us, so let’s just be adults here and do what’s best for everybody.”
I’m left speechless by his admission. That’s a lot to take in, and I need a minute to actually grasp onto everything he just said. Even though his confession hurt, in a way, it was also honest, and after feeling like my parents have been hiding stuff from me, I do appreciate that honesty. Still, hearing that I agreed to marry for reasons other than love makes my chest ache.
Was I really that kind of person?
“How would it benefit us to get married?” I ask after gathering my thoughts.
Matt shrugs, “Mostly because our fathers do a lot of business together, and they are planning on merging their companies after our marriage. It would show the board members that this would still be a family business, which your father has always claimed it to be. Also, my father wants me to take over the company in a few years, and I might have a bit of a wild side. Hookers and partying all night. It’s kind of a turn off for some of the investors, getting married and settling down, would ease their minds.”
“So, what you’re saying is, we’re getting married for show, to boost our families images?”
“It doesn’t have to be that way. I mean, I do like you… you’re really pretty,” he says, his eyes briefly scanning my body.
“Ah… thanks.” I guess he said that to compliment me, but it feels more like an insult. Are my looks all he likes about me? Is that what he bases my character on?
“We could have a good life together, and I would take care of you. I mean, I’m an asshole, but I protect what’s mine.”
“I don’t know. I don’t remember you, or anyone for that matter. I don’t know what’s real and what’s not.”
Matt nods as if he understands, “I see that this is something you need to think about. If you could do me a small favor and not tell your parents that I told you the truth about us, I would appreciate it. They asked me to tell you we were in love and all that shit. Just a precaution in case we do get married. I don’t want to piss off the in-laws right off the bat.”
“I won’t tell them, and thanks for being honest with me. I really appreciate it.”
“No problem, here is my number. Call me if you want to talk more.” He hands me a business card. I take it and hold on to it tightly like it’s a lifeline. I feel like I might need his honesty in the future.