“I know what is causing you pain, Ethan. One moment in time, and you lost a person you loved. A dear friend. A friend who had many who loved him, and they also suffered and grieved. You feel guilty at your part in it, and you feel keen regret. I also want you to understand that Oscar could have chosen to ignore your advice and chase after Catherine. It did take two to climb into that bed, and he should have done the honorable thing as a gentleman and made an offer. A man in love would not stay away, and perhaps he would have eventually come around.”
His fingers caught a lock of her wet hair. “That chance to return to her was taken from him because…” Ethan’s throat worked on a harsh swallow.
“I know,” she said softly. “Mistakes are made every day, and regret can live in our hearts for a long time. I cannot know the burden you carry, but if you allow me, I would share it, and help you carry the weight until it is no longer burdensome.”
He stared at her as if she were a rare creature. “You make no sense,” her duke rasped.
“I understand my heart, and you will know it in full eventually. Now tell me, this fear I see, what is it for?”
He held her gaze for a long moment. “Losing you. I am fucking petrified of losing you.”
The crack in her heart widened. “You cannot lose me,” she whispered. “Our marriage is until death parts us.”
His hands tightened on her hips and across her back as if he would never allow her to jump from him. “I am afraid to lose your light,” he said gruffly. “Your smile, the sweet way you look at me as if you cannot believe I am yours. Because you see, every day, I am shocked that you are mine and so damn grateful for it. I sleep in your arms, and there are no nightmares, only dreams of what our future might hold. I kiss you, and your taste destroys everything horrible that came before it. I…you make me feel in ways I cannot understand, Verity. But by God, I know it to be a love that will never dim, but only grows. I want to amuse you, spoil you, protect and cherish you every day that we are together. I love you.”
She pressed her forehead to his, startled to feel tears on her face. “I love you, Ethan.”
He hugged her to him and buried his face in her neck.
“Love me. Verity,” he said into the curve of her throat.
“I do,” she gasped. “I do. I love you!”
An almost unbearable ache twisted through her soul as a harsh breath of relief issued from him. They stood like that, uncaring that the rain fell in greater earnest. She leaned back so she could lift his face to hers, and kissed his mouth, tasting him and the chill of the rain. “No more regrets, Ethan. We will step forward together and give Thomas a wonderful life. We will introduce him to Lord Preston’s parents and, if they are interested, allow them to be a part of his life. We will surround him with love and acceptance, and we will tell him of his mother and father. We won't look back on the mistakes but on the loving memories.”
“I love you,” he said, taking her mouth into a long and deep kiss that lasted for a very long time.
* * *
Two years later
Verity smiledas she watched Catherine stroll about the lawns with little Thomas and a small baby girl in a perambulator. It had taken some time, but Ethan’s team of investigators had found her living in a small village in Grenoble. Catherine had been married and heavy with child, so she and Verity had exchanged letters for several months, until she paid them a visit only a week ago.
Ethan came up behind her and slipped his hand around her waist, gently resting his hand over Verity’s softly rounded belly. She was six months pregnant with their first child, and everyone greatly anticipated the birth of an heir. Despite this, she knew Ethan would be just as happy if they had a daughter.
“She is different,” Verity whispered. “Catherine is happy. I have never thought I would ever see such lightness in her.”
“Her husband is a good man,” Ethan said gruffly. “We went fishing this morning, and it was rather pleasant.”
She leaned her head back against him. “We spoke at length this morning. Catherine…does not wish to take Thomas with her back to France. She was rather horrified at the notion, promising that was never her intention, nor will it ever be.”
A shudder went through Ethan, and she felt the relief in him. Though he had grown to love Thomas as his own son, and had adopted him, he had braced himself to hand him over to his mother, should she prove that she was responsible enough to lovingly take care of her son. When he had just told Verity, she had cried, desperately afraid of losing Thomas , but had accepted that reuniting son and mother might be a possibility.
Though Catherine clearly loved Thomas, she truly felt the best life for him was in England with Verity and Ethan.
“I am selfish because I am so happy to not lose him,” she whispered.
“You love him,” he said gruffly. “As do I. Catherine was generous enough to forgive my hand in Oscar not offering for her.”
“She believes Mr. Langdon is her perfect match and seeing them together, I cannot help but believe it myself.”
They stood there, clasped in each other’s embrace, watching their family playing on the lawns in the distance. Artie and Thomas chased the cats, and Catherine’s husband joined her and their baby daughter on the blankets to watch the spectacle. Verity turned in the cage of his arms, slipped her hand around his neck, and kissed her duke.
* * *