And the moment it hit my tongue, my wolf went still with a quiet Oh. She had been leashed just like that. Because the man in front of me was her king, and instead of fighting his authority, she was now willing to bow before it.
My fangs grew longer from the combined panic over being trapped by a werewolf and the unfortunate desire kissing him had created. It had been a long time since I’d let myself be properly kissed, and he was a master with his tongue.
I bit his lip.
He swore and stumbled backwards, holding a hand to his now-bloody mouth. “What the fuck, Secret?”
“I said no, and when a lady says no, you better fucking respect that. ” In case biting him hadn’t gotten my point to sink in, I slapped him hard across the face.
“You felt it. Tasted it. Don’t pretend you didn’t. ”
I had. I’d tasted the cinnamon. And now looking at him, it still filled my mouth with its familiar spiciness. “It doesn’t matter. ”
“It does matter. I felt your wolf, and I made her obey me. You’re still my mate. Still my wife. ”
“Don’t you ever say that word to me again, do you hear me? Not ever. You had your chance to make me your wife, and you threw it away. Don’t pretend you want to be my husband now. Fuck you. ”
Without his arm to block me, I turned on my heel and walked back towards the restaurant, fighting back the tears threatening to fall. I wouldn’t cry, not because of Lucas Rain. He’d gotten the best of me too many times.
But my wolf didn’t care about my emotions. She only knew what she’d felt. And to her, he felt like her mate.
Dumb bitch.
Chapter Nineteen
I woke at nightfall wrapped in Holden’s arms.
After we’d left the restaurant with a rushed excuse, I’d gone back to the hotel room with him and dragged him into our bedroom. At first he’d assumed I was in the mood for some rough-and-tumble sex inspired by dinner with an ex-lover. But when I’d burst into tears, all notions of naughty business had vanished.
He’d held me until sunrise,
when daylight forced me into a blessed and much-needed sleep.
With a new night upon us, I hoped to be able to put my encounter with Lucas out of my mind.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Holden whispered.
I couldn’t pretend to still be sleeping since he’d obviously sensed me rise.
“No. ”
“Did he do something?”
I twined my fingers with Holden’s and snuggled deeper into his embrace, needing a false sense of security more now than I had in a long time. “Doesn’t he always?”
“Need me to beat him up for you?”
I tried to laugh but it came out as a half-sob, and I struggled against the urge to start crying again. I’d already ruined the hotel linens with my blood-tinted tears; it wasn’t like I was going to make it any worse.
But I hated the idea of crying about him two nights in a row, not when I’d managed to be unfeeling about him for so long.
“I need to work. I have to figure out what Sutherland was looking for. Really looking for. ”
“Are you sure you don’t need some pick-me-up sex? I’d be more than happy to provide. I’m generous like that. ” He kissed the back of my neck, his lips tickling the fine hairs growing there.
“As fun as that sounds, I need to focus on something other than sex. Or love. Or relationships. I need something gritty and unpleasant. ”
“I don’t know what love is like for you, but it doesn’t get much more gritty and unpleasant. ” He gave me a firm squeeze, and his sharp inhalation told me he was smelling my hair. It was a rare occasion for him to use his lungs, but I’d caught him taking in my scent a few times in the past. It was sort of sweet, in a weird way.