18
JOHNNY
Claire leaves my side to meet her friends, and I swear it’s like a chunk of my fucking soul goes with her.
I hate it, the intense desire I have to be near her, if only to keep her safe and out of harm's reach. It's out of my control.
I'm the one she needs to be protected from.
The girl who shoved me last night stares directly at me from across the bar while talking to Claire. “Your boyfriend can join us.”
“He’s not my boyfriend.” Claire shoots a glare my way.
“JJ!” Josey waves at me from his spot in the corner, hijacking my attention.
“Hey, man.” I shake his hand and take the seat next to him. “Whiskey, neat,” I tell the barkeep when he approaches.
“That your lady?” Josey tips his glass in the direction of Claire.
I shake my head. “No. Farthest thing from it, actually.”
“Sure.” He downs the contents of his drink and pushes it forward for a refill. “Why does she keep looking over here then?”
“Maybe she’s got the hots for you.” I take a sip and let the booze tingle its way into my body. Anything to distract me from turning toward her again.
Josey chuckles. “Doubtful. Five years ago, possibly. I’m an old man now.”
“What are you, like twenty-six?”
“I’ll be thirty in a few months.”
“Damn. You’re nearly a senior citizen.” I gulp down the rest of my whiskey. “I know you didn’t ask me to come here to have small talk.” I tilt my head. “What’s this about?”
“Listen, J, I feel for you. I really do. You’ve always pegged me as a decent dude. I understand why you’re doing what you are, but I think you underestimate how dangerous this world is.” Josey points to my face. “That shit, it’s nothing compared to some of the stuff I’ve seen.”
I scratch at my chin. “Is this an intervention or something? You think I’m unaware of what I signed up for? Are you trying to scare me straight?”
Josey swirls his finger around the rim of his glass. “No. Not at all. I get it. You’re going to keep doing what you are. There’s no backing out for you at this point, not while you’re still figuring out a contingency plan. But I’m not the only one who sees that. And I’m not the person you need to be worried about.”
A loud crash has everyone stunned for a brief second and a server curses about their dropped tray. Just as quick, the room resumes partying.
Josey continues. “Boss treats you like a toy. He won’t stop until you’re begging him for your life. And he’ll stop at nothing to make damn sure that happens.”
I face him. “This isn’t news to me, Josey. I’m fucked. I’m in over my head, and I have no fucking clue how I’m going to get out of this alive. But you and I both know it’s not about me. If it was, I wouldn’t be tied up in this shit to begin with. I’d be out there.” I motion toward the college crowd laughing and drinking and enjoying their Saturday night. “I wouldn’t be failing all my classes, and I’d probably have some lame job at a coffee shop or something, and I’d sure as shit be chasing after that girl over there. I wouldn’t have two black eyes and busted ribs. I’d be normal. I’d be boring. But that life is over. I left it behind the moment I volunteered to be his bitch because it was the only thing I could do at the time. And until I figure something else out, I have no other choice in the matter.”
I raise my hand to get another round.
Josey keeps his voice low. “I don’t want to see you end up dead, J.”
“Me either.” I peer over my shoulder and locate Claire, just to confirm she’s still okay. If I can’t protect myself, at least I can watch over her when I’m around.
“That package…you get any leads yet?”
“Not a damn thing.” And if I don’t find a lead soon, I really will be a dead man.
Josey shifts his focus around the crowded bar and leans in close. “I can trust you, right?” His dark brown eyes pierce through me with his serious tone.
“Yeah, of course.” I’d never betray Josey, not in a million years.