“If you’re willing to put in the work,” Mason said, “the rewards can be incredible.”
“And he ought to know.” Mallory grinned at him. “He’s happy as a pig in shit with Jordan.”
“Oink,” Mason said, making the others laugh.
“You guys all have your lives so together.”
“So do you, Jace,” Nina said. “You shouldn’t sell yourself short.”
“I’m an ex-con bartender with two kids someone else is raising. I’d hardly consider my life in any way together.”
“Look at where you were six years ago,” Mason said. “Think about how far you’ve already come rather than how far you have to go to get where you want to be.”
“Mason makes a good point,” Nina said. “For what it’s worth, I find that the people who tend to do the best in this program and in a sober life are the ones who have genuine regret for what’s happened in the past and want to do better in the future. They’re the ones who tend to work the hardest to maintain their sobriety and to chart a better course for the future. I see those qualities in you.”
“I’m glad you do,” Jace said, moved by her words, “but I feel like a work very much in progress.”
“We all are,” Mason said. “When I was first with Jordan, I couldn’t imagine what a woman like her saw in me. I almost messed it up by having so much self-doubt. You need to think of yourself as a clean slate, like a dry-erase board wiped clean with a new set of markers that you can use to create a whole new picture.”
“That’s very profound, Mason,” Nina said.
Mason rolled his eyes. “If you say so.”
“I do say so,” Nina replied. “What do you think of that metaphor, Jace?”
“I like it.”
“To continue Mason’s metaphor,” Mallory said, “you could put the mistakes of the past in a box off to the side, stored in a safe place to remind you not to make them again.”
“You guys are good at this,” Jace said, grinning.
“We’ve all been where you are,” Mallory said. “We understand how hard it is to rebuild, but we’ve found the effort is worthwhile. The rewards can be enormous.”
The others nodded in agreement.
“Thank you for listening to me and for the outstanding advice.”
“We’re here every day, same time and place,” Quinn said, smiling.
“I’m very thankful for that.” Jace was amazed at how much lighter he felt after airing his worries with the group that had become so important to him. When Mallory, Quinn and Mason invited him to join them for coffee again, he was pleased to accept.
After the meeting, Jeff pulled him aside. “I heard what you said, and I respect the effort you’re making, but please… My sister is so special. Please be good to her.”
“I promise you I will. She’s very special to me, too.”
Jeff nodded, seeming satisfied by what Jace had said.
Jace extended his hand to Jeff, who shook it. “Thanks for looking out for her, and maybe don’t tell her I was talking about her at an AA meeting?”
Jeff smiled. “I won’t.”
They parted company in the church parking lot, where Quinn, Mallory and Mason waited for him. When they were seated at Rebecca’s with coffees and muffins in front of them, Jace thanked them again for the insight they’d shared at the meeting.
“You’re doing all the right things,” Quinn said. “That’s what matters—and it’ll matter to Cindy, too.”
“Part of me feels like I should just leave her alone. She’s been through so much. More than I even know about, I’m sure.”
“It’s a lot,” Mason said. “Her dad is a piece of work and got away with his shit for years because he was a high-ranking officer.”