Chapter Ten
Perri
Rash decisions never feel this awful.
Leaving Parker’s place after he stormed out was a hard decision to make. Whatever happened in the time before we saw one another yesterday and my leaving, it was not good. Something switched inside of him, and I am afraid there is no way to switch things back to the way they were.
Might be for the best—what was I thinking diving into the deep end of something with a man I just met? For a few days, long enough to get lost in the waves of what he made me feel, I thought I could manage it. I let myself believe I could be enough for someone. How can I be when I am not even sure I am enough for myself?
Going back home to my mother after how certain I claimed to be about Parker is not an option. Instead, I booked a hotel room for a few days before I can get out of town. I cannot be here now. Not after all the time I spent here in Hope Springs was spent with Parker. I need to go. I will, once I decide where I will go next.
“Not home for good, sweetheart?” Maude asks as she slides my favorite mochaccino across the counter at me.
“Sadly, no. I mean, I had planned to stay until I made a big mistake. I won’t be here much longer,” I admit with a weary sigh before I thank her for the sweet coffee and say goodby.
Taking my time walking back to the hotel, I consider how I keep failing at the simple things in life. School was a breeze for me, yet I stayed two extra years to get more degrees than I can use. Despite that education, simple tasks like laundry or cooking felt like torture for me. Making friends has always felt impossible so I was always on my own. And dating was never something that interested me before I met Parker.
Once I met him, so much of it made sense. I never wanted to date before because I was waiting to find him. Those simple tasks can be learned, and he was willing to teach me. And friends—it felt as if I had finally found my best friend. Until this morning when today all of that seemed like nothing but a dream. Now it feels like it was maybe all a nightmare.
Parker is a grown man with a duty to our country that I know is important to him. He said being a pilot is who he is. I cannot ask him to make time to take care of a mess like me. There are more important things in this world than a silly little girl who will never be a good partner for him.
“Leaving so soon,” a voice calls, stopping me in my tracks, “were you even going to tell me goodbye, pet?”
Before I can move, he is there, right behind me, his hands on my hips. “I... I said goodbye, Parker. I left a note,” I whisper, my voice trembling.
“That goodbye was not fucking good enough,” he growls as he yanks me back against him, “no goodbye would ever be enough, baby girl.”
“I-I’m sorry....” I trail off when his lips drag over my throat.
“No, baby I am sorry. I was awful yesterday. I never should have bailed on you when I got that call. I cannot imagine the things you have been thinking. I behaved like an asshole,” he murmurs, wrapping thick, strong arms around me to haul me closer, lifting me off my feet.
“I just thought,” I sigh and close my eyes, melting into his embrace, “I thought maybe you realized you really did not want to take care of me,” I admit, closing my eyes as his arms tighten around me.
“Oh, pet,” he hums, kissing at my throat before he comes around to face me, refusing to let me go, “no. I spent most of my life taking care of just me. Looking out for myself. No one else was going to, so I had to. I would not say I was selfish, but I never gave much thought to anyone else. When you crashed into me the day we met, you looked up at me with these soft, doe eyes and I knew I wanted to take care of you for the rest of my life. From that very first second, I knew I would give anything, do anything, and be anyone for you. I fell in love with you the second those eyes looked up at me and you let me know I could take care of you,” his voice is raspy as his eyes soften and I feel my heartbeat stutter in my chest.Did he just say...?
“You...you said you werein lovewith me.... Parker...we just met?”
“Yeah, we did and if I could do anything different, it would be meeting you sooner, just so I could love you longer. I am in love with you, Perri. I screwed up yesterday—when I needed you most, I turned my back on you. I am so fucking sorry, pet,” he whispers, touching his nose to mine as he cradles my face in gentle hands, “I got a bad call, and I lost my shit. I never should have said what I said to you. Never should have let you think for one moment I regretted being with you, because I don’t. I could never regret finding you, Perri. I love you,” he breathes the words against my lips, and I feel as if he is literally breathing life into me.
“I love you too,” I whisper back, my fingers clutching at his shoulders to keep me steady on my feet.
“Say it again, pet,” his voice changes abruptly, raw and deep, “let me hear you say it again,”
“I love you, Parker. I will learn to take care of you, I promise. Even if it takes forever. You told me I do not have to grow up but for the first time in my life, I want to. I won’t ever stop making reckless choices or doing impulsive things—and I won’t promise I will ever be a good cook—but you want to take care of me no matter what. And that means I want to take care of you too.I love you.I am so sorry I left your place, but I was scared you would have been unhappy if I was still there when you got back.”
“Oh, baby girl, no. I was crushed when I came home without my sweet girl there,” he murmurs, kissing me softly as I melt against him, “you take care of me by being there. Being in my life. And we will have forever for you to learn whatever you want to learn. We can learn things together. I won’t ever let you go now that I have you. I love you. You made me feel whole for the first time in my life the very first time you smiled at me—and I can’t be whole without you. Can I take you home now, pet?”
Grinning up at him as he pulls back with light in his beautiful eyes, I nod. “Yes. Take me home,daddy,” I purr, heat flickering between us.
“Fuck. When I get you home, pet,” he growls, sliding a hand beneath my skirt to smack my bare ass, “I am going to show you what you get for thinking you get to leave me.Never. Do you hear me? Youneverget to leave me. I will tie you to my fucking bed and breed you to tie you to me forever.”
“Yes,” I moan, as I rub against him “yes, daddy. I hear you. I won’t ever leave you. I promise you. I swear, you can punish me if you need to,” I whimper as his fingers slide between my cheeks, spreading me before he plunges two inside me. I tighten around his thick fingers, and he grunts.
“Good girl. I ought to bend you over right here and show anyone who wants to see that you belong to me. Punish you by not letting you come on daddy’s cock,” he threatens even as he pumps his fingers inside of me, almost promising I am most certainly going to come.
“Daddy,” I whimper, my hips twisting under his touch, “no, please, don’t punish me. missed you so bad,” I pant the words as he drags his wet fingers back up between my cheeks. I gasp when he rubs at methere.
“Soon I will take you here tonight, pet,” he murmurs against my mouth, “going to own every single part of you. Next time you try to leave me, you will do it with a body branded by me. Because all the rest of you belongs to me, does it not, baby girl?”