It turned out her spoilt king was the ultimate people-pleaser. And he never really took time to please himself personally.
‘You wouldn’t have to do any of that for me,’ she said. ‘All I’d want is to be in your life. To share things with you—the good and the bad. To be as honest with you as we’ve been this last night. With truth there’s trust, right?’
He was very still. ‘There are things you’ll want to do in your life that you couldn’t do if you stayed here.’
‘Maybe but maybe not. I know you’re the King, I know there are expectations that you will always meet because you love Silvabon and you love the people here and you love the palace even though you’ve had heartache here. I would never want you to renounce your duty or your crown.’ Her heart raced. ‘The thought of a public element to my life scares me a little but I know you’d help me. And maybe I could then even help you with it? I could help others too, couldn’t I? I could find something...’ She trailed off as she saw the tension in his face, but she couldn’t stop herself from fighting for him. He was so worth it. ‘You don’t have to be alone in everything, Felipe. You could have it all—the crown, yes, and a wife, and children. And with us all together, supporting each other, it could be okay...?’
‘I’ve seen people try, remember?’ he said harshly, denying her. ‘They all fail.’
She stared at him so determinedly standing alone and implacable. ‘You’re like a rock in the centre of a fast-flowing river. All the water is swirling around but you’re always there, always anchoring others. Steadfast and dependable, right? But you need your own strength replenished. You can’t keep holding on for everyone else for ever. That’s not fair.’
‘Life isn’t fair.’
‘But you don’t have to be alone. You don’t have to sacrifice everything for everyone else. You can have your dreams. Your person. You could have me.’ She inhaled shakily and confessed it all. ‘I would love you. I’ve already fallen in love with you. Felipe...’
Felipe stood so still—not hearing, not believing. He had to stop her from talking. From confusing him and making every cell inside him ache for something so much more than physical. He was shaking on the inside and he had to stop her from saying that.
‘I watched the video,’ he muttered harshly.
‘You...what?’ She stared at him, clearly derailed. ‘What?’
‘It’s embedded in the article they’ve written. It played automatically.’
‘Why didn’t you stop it?’
Because he couldn’t breathe. Because she was beautiful. Because once it had started he simply couldn’t do anything.
‘I asked you not to,’ she whispered. ‘You said you wouldn’t.’
She was truly hurt now. Pinched and pale and shocked. She’d not believed he’d have ever done that. But he had. Maybe he shouldn’t have told her, but he couldn’t not. He felt too awful not to be honest with her. And now he had to hurt her more. He was being cruel to be kind. He had to push her away. He had to make her run. Because he couldn’t cope with what she was saying. Not now. Not ever.
Her eyes shimmered with reproach. ‘You broke your promise to me.’
‘Yes.’ His throat tightened. Never had he regretted anything more.
He’d betrayed her. And now she shut down in front of him. He saw it—the change, the defiance blooming in her eyes. He leaned against the door—stopping himself from leaning into her.
‘So the thought of this becoming anything more—’ She looked at him directly and asked sadly, ‘That’s a hard no?’
He couldn’t answer that.
‘You only had to let me in,’ she said. ‘Only let me love you. You only had to be there for me.’
No. That wasn’t right. ‘You should have so much more than that, Elsie. You should have someone love you too. I can’t be the man who does. I don’t have—’ He shook his head. ‘Can’t.’
‘Won’t,’she said brokenly. ‘You won’t. There’s a difference.’
‘Can’t.’He couldn’t bear to see her wither. People didn’t thrive at the palace.
His mother had faded. His father had run away. His grandfather had become like stone—unyielding, uncompromising. And suddenly he was furious with her for not believing him. He’d seen it, lived it and he could not see her suffer. She’d want to leave eventually. And when she did? It would destroy him. So she had to go now. Before the damage to them both was irreparable. And he was so angry he could scarcely see straight.
Only her anger propelled her forward. She marched up to him and planted her feet so she stood right in front of him. He couldn’t escape. He could only push.
‘Was I just someone convenient who you wanted only because you knew you couldn’t have me for long? The thrill of the challenge? The fun of deception and claiming someone completely inappropriate for your status?’ Elsie did not want to believe that. But she didn’t know what to believe now.
He’d seen it. The one person she didn’t want to. It was something so private that had been so shredded and he’d promised...
And now here he was telling her he needed her to leave. He didn’t have the energy for her. She wasn’t worth the effort. And the rejection hurt. The denial of her feelings, of her value, sliced so deep, creating a wound like none before. She’d thought he understood her—that they’d understood each other. And now she was angry because, not only was she unwanted, she felt a fool. All over again. She’d had no idea of the ugly truth—just as she’d believed her father had been genuine in that crowdfunding effort when it had been just a scam to get more of what he’d wanted. This was a scam too—Felipe had made her fall with his charm and his assurances. Only he’d lied.