Chapter Twenty-Six
PART TWO
Sienna
There wassomething about watching the sunset from my bedroom window that made me feel...hopeful. Maybe it was because the day was coming to an end, and the idea of tomorrow held promise that things might get better.
A new beginning.
Perhaps tomorrow the memories would be erased, and the pain would be gone. Maybe I’d wake up in the morning not missing him at all and not feel like I got swallowed into hell, now living in the devil's asshole.
God. Who was I kidding? It had been weeks since I woke up finding him gone, every trace of him removed as if someone had pressed the ‘delete’ button on Noah's existence. It was like he was never here, as if our time together never happened. If it weren't for the memories that kept torturing me, I'd probably wonder if it wasn't all just a dream.
Of course, it wasn't all a dream. The pain was too fucking real for it to have been a dream. And I was foolish enough to think that I'd wake up one morning, and everything would be all right.
Maybe one day I'd be able to get out of bed with a smile on my face. But that day wasn't today.
I turned away from the window and sat on the edge of the bed, letting my feet dangle. Everything had changed when I kissed him that first night. I could still remember the way the world shifted when his lips claimed mine for the first time. He kissed me like I was his, as if he controlled every aspect of me. It was raw. It was perfect. It was nothing how I imagined kissing a stranger would be. There was an electric buzz that spread from my lips all the way down my body and straight to my toes; a spark that would explode in my chest at any moment.
I closed my eyes, remembering every second of that night. How opening that front door and staring into a stranger’s iridescent blue eyes took my breath away. It was the first time I had ever seen blue irises burn with fire.
“Is this the Whitlock residence?”
I glanced down at his buttoned shirt and casual cargo shorts before noticing the truck behind him, two guys grabbing beer kegs off the back. “You must be looking for Silas.” I placed my hand on my hip and felt slight disappointment settle on my expression. “The beer kegs go on the back patio.”
“Oh, I’m not—”
“Sienna!” Oakley’s voice erupted from behind me, and nerves shattered inside my brain, waking the stupid inside my head, forcing me to do, well…something stupid. I grabbed the blue-eyed stranger’s shirt and pulled him closer, lifting myself on my toes while pulling him down toward me, crashing my lips to his. I couldn’t be sure whether it was the beer I had just downed or the adrenaline of running from Oakley, but feeling this man’s warm lips against mine didn’t just stir a flicker inside my belly; it ignited a goddamn fire that blazed through my system within a single heartbeat.
Swept away in the moment, our kiss deepened. Two strong arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me tighter against him as he plunged his tongue inside my mouth, the tantalizing taste of peppermint and bourbon teasing my tastebuds, leaving me wanting more of it. Our tongues danced, his exploring every corner of my mouth while mine surrendered to the rhythm of our kiss. It was fucking insane. We kissed like it was something we had done a thousand times before. Our kiss was lit with chemistry that crackled around us, the softness of his lips carrying me away while his unyielding kiss kept me captive.
I exhaled and opened my eyes wishing there was a way I could erase every memory of him. If only I knew then what I know now, I never would have opened that door, because that was the moment everything changed. It was the beginning of the end for us.
For me.
I pushed my feet harder against the carpet, letting my toes sink into it. I wished I could pull the rug out from under my bed. I wished I could take it, roll it around me like a blanket, and let this bed take me somewhere else, somewhere far away from the painful thoughts that kept me awake at night. A place where I'd forget all about him and not walk around as if my broken heart was a disability that would never allow me to run right. A place where I'd no longer taste bitterness in my mouth and regret in my throat.
“I'm starting to think Dad is right.”
I glanced over my shoulder at Spencer standing in the doorway with his arms crossed and a look of pity on his face.
I looked back down at my feet while my toes played with the carpet thread. “I want to ask what it is our dearest Daddy is right about, but I'm not sure I care enough to give a fuck.”
“Sienna, it's been weeks—”
“Eight weeks, three days and,” I glanced at my alarm clock, “two hours to be exact.”
The mattress dipped as Spencer sat down beside me, the scent of his spicy cologne invading my space. “You need to deal with this. Get your life back.”
“I know.”
“Hiding here in your room is not going to help you get over what this asshole did to you.”
I shifted, pulling my legs up underneath me. “I'm aware of that.”
“Are you?”
“Yes, Spencer. I am,” I snapped, and glared at him. “Did it ever occur to you that maybe I'm not hiding? That maybe I'm up here in my room trying really fucking hard to put the pieces back together but failing miserably?”