“It’s fine. It’s been a tough few weeks. I just needed to crash.”
He glares at me, and after a few seconds, I lift my eyes to meet his.
I love him more than fucking anything. But fuck, sometimes I also really fucking hate him.
Everything about him is just so… easy. Life for him is so… easy.
The complete fucking opposite to mine. And for as long as I can remember, all I’ve wanted is to be more like him. To see the world through his rose-coloured glasses. To roll with the punches and not take life too seriously.
But that’s not my reality.
While he’s all lightness and laughs, I’m the dark, lost soul who just doesn’t fit by his side.
All my life, I’ve had to listen to people compare the two of us.
Why can’t I play football like him? Why can’t I get grades and succeed at school like him?
It’s exhausting, being the second-rate twin. But it’s also normal now. I know my place, and I embrace it the best I can. All the while fighting to carve out my place in the Family, to prove my worth and find a future where my grades and academic ability don’t matter.
“You need to stop that shit, man. It’s not good for you.”
“It is what it is. It smells like girl in here,” I point out, needing to get to the bottom of my visit.
Alex closes the laptop sitting beside him that he must have been working on when I barged in and studies me once more.
“I was just hanging with Calli. Doing some school work.”
I narrow my eyes at him.
“What? Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Nico will gut you like a fish if you lay a finger on her,” I tell him, not even cringing at the fact that I deserve that kind of end after what I’ve done to her.
Part of me is surprised I didn’t wake up to both Nico and Theo breathing down on me with their knives poised.
But for some reason, she seems to be keeping everything that’s happened between us a secret so far.
What I can’t work out is why.
She has no loyalties to me, not really.
And it’s not like I’ve treated her well.
I got her off at Halloween and walked away without another word. Something that really fucking pained me to do. And then there’s this weekend.
Why wouldn’t she go running to big brother and let him deal with me? Surely it would be easier than waiting around for me to appear in the dead of night to retaliate.
She has to know it’s coming.
She’s proved time and time again that she’s not all that naïve when it comes to me. She’s also shown both of us that she’s clearly got the ability to handle me, too.
So maybe it’s what she wants.
Maybe she’s waiting.
Maybe that’s why she was here.
She wanted me to find her. To know she was hanging out with Alex. To torment me.