I manage to swallow a few mouthfuls of the gorgeous chicken pasta Ash made before pushing it aside. “I have something for you, and I need a favor,” I say, sipping my water.
“What is it?” Ash looks as glum as I feel, and I hope my gift will cheer her up.
I drop the keys to the rental in her palm. “The car is yours. I bought it and put it in your name.”
“Get the fuck out!” Her mouth opens and closes like a fish out of water. “Why would you do that?”
“Because you’re my bestie. I love you, and I’m going to miss you. Plus, I know how much you hate the smelly bus. This way, you’ll be able to pop back home and see your folks whenever you want.”
She bursts out crying, flinging herself at me. “You’re the best friend I’ve ever had, Viv, and it’s not because you bought me a car, you crazy bitch.” Sniffling, she eases back, swiping her tears away. “You have helped me more than you realize. I see your strength and your humility and your amazing heart, and it inspires me to be a better person.”
“Youarea good person, Ash. One of the best I know.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever had a true friend before you. I don’t have this bond with Cat. I can tell you anything, and I know you’ll never judge. I will miss you more than words.”
“This isn’t goodbye, Ash. Only goodbye for now.” Reeve’s face appears in my mind’s eye, and I hear him telling me that back in January. A pang of longing sweeps over me, and what I wouldn’t give for one of Reeve’s hugs now.
“I am seriously in shock.” Ash tosses the keys in her palm. “I can’t believe you bought me a car.”
“You’re welcome. I feel happier knowing you’re not risking life and limb taking the bus,” I joke, trying to bolster my mood. “I need one last favor.”
“Anything. You know that.”
Walking to my room, I retrieve the special edition Fender from my closet.
She gasps when I arrive back in the kitchen with it. “I got this for Dillon. I had hoped our last night would go differently, and I had planned on giving it to him myself. Will you see he gets it?”
“He doesn’t fucking deserve it,” she snaps, still mad at her brother.
Taking it out of the case, I run my fingers over his name etched into the wood.
“Jesus, Viv. It’s beautiful. He’s going to feel like such an ass when I give this to him.” She folds her arms across her chest. “If it didn’t have his name on it, I’d probably have given this to Jamie.”
I burst out laughing. “At least you’re honest.”
“Then I’d take it back off him when he did something to piss me off and give it to my brother when he redeemed himself.” She traces her fingers over the guitar strap where Toxic Gods is embedded in the leather.
“Look after him for me,” I say in case he doesn’t come through as I hope.
“I will if you promise to look after yourself.”
“Always.” If there’s one thing I’ve learned on this journey of self-discovery, it’s that I can’t care for anyone if I don’t care for myself first.
“This isn’t goodbye, Viv.” Ash hugs me close. “Itisonly goodbye for now. I feel that deep in my bones as if it’s been ordained by God himself.”
I don’t know if she’s right. I guess time will tell.