Sammy blew out a breath. “It wasn’t just you. I said some pretty hurtful things, too. I knew what a sensitive topic your mother and sister were and I threw it in your face.” He shook his head. “We were both at fault, but the problem wasn’t you or me. The problem wasus.”
Olivia’s skin chilled. “What does that mean?”
“It means we were young and naïve. We loved each other, but it wasn’t enough. Our lives were going down different paths and neither of us was mature enough to handle it. If we hadn’t broken up, we would’ve had to deal with different obstacles—you in New York, me in Cali. Even if I stayed in New York, you’d have worked crazy hours in banking while I worked crazy hours building a bakery from scratch. We never would’ve seen each other, and I’m not convinced that wouldn’t have been the death of us eventually.” His eyes grew sad. “I think we knew that deep down, and I think the thought freaked us out to the point where we lashed out. We weren’t ready for what the real world had to throw at us. Sometimes,” he said softly. “It’s not about love. It’s about timing.”
Everything he said made sense, and it had already happened, so Olivia wasn’t sure why her heart ached so much. Maybe it was because deep down, beneath the layers of logic and practicality, she was a romantic at heart, and the idea that love wasn’t enough to conquer all depressed the hell out of her.
“What about now?” she asked. “How’s our timing now?”
Emotion flared in his eyes before it dimmed. “You’re only in SF for the summer. Stanford for another year. After that, you’re back in New York. I wouldn’t say the timing is great now, either.”
Olivia was quiet for a long moment while her brain whirred, spitting out pros and cons and hypotheticals so fast she almost couldn’t keep up. “I don’thaveto go back to New York,” she said, watching his face carefully. “I’ve worked in the SF branch all summer, and I’ve done a good job. I’m sure I could convince management to let me transfer here if I wanted.”
Sammy’s eyes widened. “Are you saying—” He cleared his throat. “You would move to SF for me?”
“Who says I’m doing it for you? I could be doing it for me,” she teased, because hey, she couldn’t give himallthe power. “Butif that’s the only thing standing between us, then I...wouldn’t be opposed to asking for a transfer.”
“Us?” This time, Sammy’s tone was teasing.
“If you want there to be an ‘us’ again.” Olivia hated being this vulnerable. She wanted to sink into the floor out of embarrassment, but it had to be done. Trying to act all tough because of her pride had netted her nothing but trouble in the past. “Because I do. Out of all the guys I’ve dated—”
Sammy scowled.
“—you’re the one I’ve never been able to let go of.”I’m falling in love with you all over again.She bit back the confession—it was too soon for that—but it was true. All it took was a few months near Sammy and she’d gotten sucked in all over again. His charm, his humor, and his intelligence—not to mention those abs—paired with their chemistry and the way her heart flipped every time she saw him? She hadn’t stood a chance. “I agree we were young and naïve the first time, but we’re notthatyoung and naïve anymore.” She let out a shaky laugh. “We could make it work. Iwantto make it work.”
Sammy yanked her toward him, squeezing her so tight it was hard to breathe. “Liv.” Gravel filled his voice. “Fuck.”
Was that a good “fuck” or a bad “fuck”?
Olivia buried her face in his chest, trying to enjoy this moment while it lasted in case the answer was the latter. Perhaps having this conversation while they were stuck on vacation together may not have been the best idea. If he broke her heart again tonight, Olivia wasn’t sure she could put up a happy face for the rest of his family tomorrow.
Sammy pulled back and stared at her. “When we broke up, I thought you ruined my life,” he said. “I couldn’t eat. I couldn’t sleep. I was a pathetic mess—just ask my friends. And no matter how many years passed or how many dates I went on—”
This time, Olivia was the one who scowled. The thought of Sammy so much as smiling at another woman made her want to scratch said woman’s eyes out.
“—I never recaptured that spark we had. With you, I felt my emotions to the fullest. Joy, anger, sadness...both the good and the bad. But with everyone else, I was a shadow of the person I could be.” He swallowed hard. “Then I realized, you didn’t ruin my life. You ruined me for other women.”
Olivia’s head snapped up in shock.
Sammy flashed a crooked smile. “So yeah, to answer your question, I want to make it work, too. Otherwise, I’m fucked.”
Her tears blended with her laughter, which seemed appropriate because she was a hot mess. “How romantic.”
“Thanks. I thought so.”
Olivia smiled before growing serious again. “So, are we really doing this? You and me?”
Between Edison and their sex session and this conversation, the night had been a rollercoaster of emotions. Everything seemed so sudden, but when she thought about it, they’d been building toward this moment for a while. From the minute she called Sammy the night her apartment flooded, this—them—was a foregone conclusion. Because she’d known, deep down, that Sammy would show up. He was just that type of guy. She hadn’t anticipated becoming roommates with him, but she had known she was opening the door for him to enter her life again beyond a few secret glances at mutual friends’ get-togethers.
Their attraction had never died. Maybe their love hadn’t, either. It’d just been buried and covered with the disguise of hate.
Now that their past had been laid out and stripped bare, and there were no more secrets between them, maybe they could finally move on.
Whether they’d do so together remained to be seen.
“You and me, part two.” Sammy sealed the promise with a soft kiss. “Let’s do it.”