I knew I was falling for her again. Back then, she was the person I pictured in my mind every night when I took care of my aching cock.
But spending this much time alone with her, laughing and talking as if we were a couple, with her touches and caresses all night... I can't take it anymore! My hand isn't doing the trick.
Picking up my phone, I dial a number I haven't called in a while. I just don't have it in me anymore to keep going on like this. I thought I was stronger, I thought I could abide by her rules, but I can't.
I'm not some sex-crazed addict, but I used to have a routine. Anytime something happened that I couldn't control or when I was too stressed because of work, I would call in a girl to come take my mind off everything. To get rid of the pent-up energy, and clear my mind so that I could find a solution to my problem.
The problem is that I haven't been able to do that for months, and tonight is my breaking point.
I can’t go the rest of my fucking life without sex. I can't just live off having my hand do the job, especially since it's not doing anything for me anymore. It’s not possible.
I'm a fucking fool to even think for a moment that I stand a chance with Harlow. I ruined her life, no matter how good my intentions may have been back then. They led her to be homeless, kidnapped, and raped for years.
My mind can't shut down, and I feel like I'm slowly losing it. I need something, anything.
“Hello. Finding Pleasure Escort Service. How may I help you?” a woman answers after a few rings.
“Hi. Dean Beckett here. I’ll be needing Cindy over here as soon as possible. I’ll pay extra if she can be here within 10 minutes,” I say, my voice tight and my stomach uneasy at what I'm about to do, but I'm desperate.
“Oh, Mr. Beckett. So lovely to hear from you again. It’s been a while.”
“Yes. Life has been busy. Please send her to my office like always,” I ask, growing impatient. My foot taps rapidly as I sit at my desk, trying to keep calm.
“She lives nearby. I can have her over in five.”
“Perfect. Thank you.” I hang up my phone and stand up to pace again. I lose my tie, needing to get it off. I feel like I'm being strangled.
Sweat starts to drip down my spine and bead on my hairline.Fuck, why is it so hot in here?I take my suit jacket off and toss it over the couch in my office.
A few minutes later, there's a buzz from the main door. I let Cindy in. After a few moments, I hear a knock on my office door.
“Come in,” I command, and she obeys. Cindy is a tall, pretty lady with red, curly hair. I’ve never had an overwhelming attraction to her, but she's good at what she does.
“Hello, Dean. I was starting to think you forgot about me,” she purrs.
No. This isn't like how it normally is. I don't have time for her flirting. I need this now. Hard and fast before my brain can tell me to smarten the hell up.
“No. Life has been keeping me busy. Look, I don't mean to sound like an asshole, but I really just need you to take care of this,” I say, pointing to my never-ending boner. “I'll pay you extra for getting here as fast as you did.”
“Okay. I can do that,” she shrugs, stalking toward me. She wastes no time dropping to her knees and unzipping my pants. She takes out my thick cock and licks her lips.
“This is gonna be hard and fast.” I know she likes it rough, so there are no complaints from her.
She wraps her lips around my cock, and I moan at the contact. It’s been so long since I’ve felt the heat of another; the wetness of someone's mouth.
I grip a large chunk of her hair, holding her in place, then I try with everything I have to purge these urges. To use her mouth to try and fuck all of my thoughts of Harlow out of my head.
Tossing my head back, I try to concentrate on the feeling. Thrusting my hips ruthlessly as I continue to hit the back of her throat, making her take my whole cock.
I don't stop when she gags.
I don't stop when the saliva pours out of her mouth from not being able to swallow.
I don't stop until Harlow’s face flashes behind my closed eyes and I cum hard down Cindy's throat, moaning Harlow's name.
I’m ruined. She's embedded herself into my subconscious, my heart, and my soul. She owns me, even as some other woman sucks my cock.
My life is no longer my own. She owns that too.
I’m ruined, and I don't know if I’ll make it to the other end alive.